|My friend Bill B. when it comes to marriage equality - "What's to prevent you from marrying your pet?"|
Yesterday, while having a casual conversation on the phone with my longtime (since grade school) conservative (almost all of my good friends are of the conservative ilk) friend I was again reminded of the Brick Wall of Ignorance that will always be there between us.
Generally we stay away from politics (as I mentioned before, he is of the ditto-head, brainwashed Faux News ilk) and religion (yes, he is of the "I'll pray for you" ilk - "unless you accept Jesus Christ as your savior you're GOING TO HELL" ilk) and just discuss our every growing medical maladies (he also had a stent inserted into his penis a few months ago). However, yesterday the conservation veered towards marriage equality or as he prefers to call it SAME SEX MARRIAGE. While he has known Bill and I for years and likes us as we like him, he doesn't APPROVE (like who asked him?) of that word MARRIAGE applied to our union. Here is his argument (are you sitting down? This is hard to believe from an otherwise reasonably intelligent and rational person) He says: "Well Ron, once you have people of the same sex marrying what's to prevent them from marrying their pet?"
Oh here we go folks, the old Slippery Slope Argument. My first reaction was "Bill (that's his name) do you realize you just insulted me? Do you realize just how ridiculous your argument is? Do you realize that you're trivializing my union with (my) Bill?"
He doesn't answer my questions directly but responds with "Ron, there are people who believe this!" WHAT? Of course there are people who believe that once people of the same sex marry then they will want to marry their pets, cars, and bookends. I asked him "Don't you remember what happened to your former Senator Rick "Man on beast" Santorum when he made the same slippery slope argument? Again, he ignored my direct question and continued to make the lame assed argument "Ron, there ARE people who believe this!"
Honest to God folks, I felt like throwing up. I wanted to hang up the phone. My friend, my longtime friend who I've shared many a good time with was espousing this Faux News/Right Wing NutRepublican/Fundamentalist religion……crap.
Here I'm having this ridiculous and insulting "conversation" with my longtime friend, on the same day that my beloved sister-in-law got in a snit because I posted a picture on my Facebook account (that was taken in 1979) of my Mother getting her hair combed by my niece (er daughter) that showed her daughter in a long, frilly conservative (yes, my sister-in-law is also of the same conservative, religious ilk) dress. I gently poked fun at my niece and said "What is that you're wearing?" Well folks, that set off a firestorm that resulted in me receiving a letter from my sister-in-law informing me that I had "hurt" her (geez, RELAX- by the way I did send her an e-mail apologizing for the unintended hurt and I removed the offending Facebook posting) and then she gave me a dig about my "lifestyle." Well, well. Here we go again. Two people I love and respect coming out in the same day showing their true colors, that they view me as "less than."
I'll be honest with you folks, I was actually sick to my stomach yesterday. I didn't get to sleep until 3 am this morning. I know I shouldn't let things like this bother me but they do. Another thing that bothers me is the knowledge that all my Facebook postings and this blog is being monitored by those who are looking for the least little thing for which to beat me over the head with their sanctimonious cudgel. RELAX FOLKS! If you don't like what I'm saying, DON'T READ MY BLOG. DON'T READ MY FACEBOOK ACCOUNT.
As regular readers of this blog know, there are couple FORMER friends (they discontinued the friendship, if there ever was one) when they read something in my blog (I'm such a terrible person don't you know?) they THEY didn't approve of. One of my blogger friends left a comment on my blog yesterday to the effect that these people who are so quick to criticize and complain never write anything on their Facebook account or blog but they're out there trolling the blogs and Facebook accounts just looking for something to be offended about. Get a life.
I don't know what upset me the most yesterday. Inadvertently upsetting my beloved sister-in-law (who has done a lot for our family and who I much respect) or my horse blinders, head-in-the-sand friend. I think perhaps it is my friend with the horse blinders. I think my sister-in-law knows that I wouldn't intentionally hurt her but she knows me well enough to know that I sometimes go overboard with the kidding without fully considering the repercussions. Even though I thought her complaint was petty and her cheap shot at my "lifestyle" was beneath her, I can understand her situation. She prefers to remain private and here I just shoved her privacy out in the open with my Facebook account posting (which was really about my Mother, not her but I guess in future postings I'll have to blot out her face as I do my two former friends who big girl panties get in a twist whenever they see their mugs posted on my blog - group shots fellas, group shots)!
Perhaps what dismays and saddens me the most and saddens me is my longtime friend. The knowledge that he truly believes that because Bill and I got married and now have the respect and legal protections that he and his straight ilk take for granted, that he considers in his heart considers me and Bill "less than." That once the flood gates are open then "what's to prevent people from marrying their pets?" It truly saddens me that otherwise reasonable, intelligent adults, and especially friends of mine who have known me most of my life, still consider me "less than." They still consider me as damaged goods, some THING to be tolerated.
At times like this I remember the line from "The Help." Aibileen Clark (he black maid and character Viola Davis played) says to Miss Hilly (the consistently racist Southern white woman she works for). Aibileen, exhausted and tired from living with the racism, finally confronts her racist employer, Miss Hilly and says "Ain't you tired, Miss Hilly?"
And that's my question to all my so called friends and relatives who believe in their heart that I am "less than" they are. "Ain't you tired Miss Hilly, ain't you tired?"I know one thing, I'm tired of it.