Thursday, July 23, 2026

Let Them Eat Cake!

 

Lemon cake with lemon buttercream icing 


Legend has it the late doomed French Queen Marie Antoinette said in response to the French peasants clamoring for food during 18th century France drama. Of course she lost her head over such a flippant response to the legitimate pleadings of the French Great Unwashed.

I used to make cake all the time for me and Bill. However, since he died I have lost my taste for cake. Last night that cake urge came back big time. 

One of my favorite cakes is lemon cake. I've tried all recipes from copycat Starbucks Lemon Loaf to the myriad lemon cake recipes interspersed with multiple ads on my iPhone. I have found the very best recipe is a simple box cake mix. My preference is Duncan Hines Perfectly Moist Cake mix. For the icing I prefer to make my own lemon buttercream icing. 

Last night I succumbed to my desire and whipped up this scrumptious lemon cake. 


Yes, I ate that much last night. First, a modest slice then a "bonus" slice before I went to bed.

Life is good.

Wednesday, July 22, 2026

The Muggies

 

Yesterday's visitor to my butterfly bush


Another hot, muggy day today.

I can't take the humidity.

Last night it rained. Lightening, thunderstorms, winds. Then this morning, humidity lays heavy on. the landscape here in southern coastal Delaware. 

This is to be expected since I live on a peninsula surrounded by water, much like Florida.

On days like this I stay inside my house. It's too dangerous for me to go outside in this heat and humidity. Literally, too dangerous. A few times I almost didn't make it back inside before I passed out. This is the main reason I pay Jose to mow my lawn weekly, which he does every Wednesday (today).

I could stay all day at my computer here in the house but after a while my lower legs swell up. I have poor blood flow. If I take a daily walk it helps to keep my legs from swelling up. I wish I had one of those suburban malls close by that I could take one of those daily old people walks around the mall.

Last night I was up until after two AM. Usually I don't stay up that late but some nights I'm just not sleepy. I did get a good sleep in though and got up later (about 7:30 AM) that I usually do. Lately I've been waking up at 4:30 or 5 AM and can't get back to sleep. I sense "something" is going on. My appetite has changed too. I'm just not that hungry anymore. I've lost weight but not that much so far. About eight to ten pounds. Maybe this all is just an "old age" thing. But I do feel I'm transitioning to a different phase.

Today I will take a lot of time correcting and updating my family tree on Ancestry.com. Something I've been meaning to do for years but life caught up with me the last four or five years. Three years full-time caregiver for Bill and then over two years grieving for his loss. I'll always grieve over not having Bill in my life to love and take care off but I feel it is time to move on now and get ready for my grand exit. But before that happens, some loose ends to clean up. Of course I'll never have all of them cleaned up but I'll do what I can. I don't want to leave too much of a mess for Pat.

Stay cool today folks!


Tuesday, July 21, 2026

Memories of Bill - 2015




Apple has a nice feature on my iMac. It's called Memory. It randomly selects photos and videos I've taken and chooses a theme and presents these compilations to me occasionally. A few days ago they presented to me several Memory videos of the years I was taking Bill to his various doctors' appointments and caring for him. The years range from 2015 to 2019 with the exception of the year 2017 which I wasn't able to transfer over other my You Tube account. Occasionally I will be posting these Memory compilation videos to this blog in memory of Bill. 

I don't think there is a day that has gone by since Bill died early Saturday morning February 22, 2024 that I haven't thought of him and missed him terribly. The initial shock of grief has lessened somewhat overtime but I know now this grief over not having Bill in your life will never leave me as long as I am alive on this earth in this lifetime. By posting these videos I honor and keep his memory alive.  

Monday, July 20, 2026

My Family Tree

 This morning I posted a reply to one of my favorite bloggers who wrote about his grandparents. He asked his readers to share their memories of their grandparents. I left a long reply briefly sharing information about the grandparents I knew. I thought my reply was interesting and some of you might find the same. I have posted some of this information overt the years in my twenty plus years of blog posting. I'm posting it again, in this condensed form.

 I only knew one grandparent, my maternal grandfather.

Maternal grandfather - George Hadfield

He was a piece of work. He was descended from his grandfather who came over as an immigrant from Glossip, England to work in the wool mills as he and his family did in England. The year was 1854. A womanizer (married three times), cruel to my Mother growing up and at the end of his life he made everyone miserable by berating them with his Jehovah Witness crap which he discovered late in life. He even brought over a young girl my age during one of his visits thinking that would sway me. I told him “The next time you come bring a young man and I might consider….”. Yes, I did that. Of course he never brought over the young man. I think my Mother explained to him my situation. He never bothered me again.

My paternal grandmother was alive when I was but I don’t remember her because he died when I was two years old. She was an uneducated hillbilly from the western mountains of North Carolina. 


Hester Lewis Tipton, my paternal grandmother

She couldn’t read or write but she did chew tobacco and tell my Mother that dancing was “sinful.” Glad I didn’t know her.

My paternal grandfather died two years before I was born.

My paternal grandfather Fieldon Jacob Tipton with my paternal grandmother and two of their grandchildren (my cousins brother and sister Jackie and Bill Tipton) He was a farmer who along with his wife couldn't read or write but they could produce children (had a Toal of 12 sons)

He was descended from Jonathan Tipton who immigrated to this country from Port Royale, Jamaica after the Great Earthquake of 1692 destroyed his rum barrel stave making business. He had money and brought a lot of land in Maryland. His grandson fought along George Washington during the Battle of King’s Mountain. His name was Major Jonathan Tipton and he was my six time great grandfather. He was also involved in the formation of the state of Tennessee when it broke off from North Carolina. He settled in those mountains of Western North Carolina and proceeded to produce a prodigious batch of Tipton’s of which I am descended from. My paternal grandfather was also an uneducated hillbilly from those same western North Carolina mountains bordering on Tennessee. He was in the lumber business and brought his nine sons to Pennsylvania during the depression because they were starving and he and his sons (two more born in PA) lived on his brother-in-law’s fruit and vegetable farm in southern Chester County as field labor. My father met my Mother during this time. My father had multiple scars on his back from beatings received from his father. Such was the nature of chid discipline in those days. He died in 1939, two years before I was born. My Mother never met him, only knew him as “Mr. Tipton.” After the experience with her father, she probably wouldn’t want to meet him either.

My maternal grandmother died at 29 years old giving childbirth.

My maternal grandmother Ethel Hickman Hadfield. She was the oldest daughter of a well to do pig farmer.  Very educated and quite the independent personality I understand from family lore. Unfortunately she died giving childbirth at home to her sixth child at 29 years old).

She was from a long line of historical Quaker families in Pennsylvania. From her picture she was very elegant. She died before my Mother was two years old. My Mother often talked about her.

There was one great grandmother (my maternal grandfather’s mother) who I met only once. She was on her deathbed.

My great maternal grandmother Isabelle "Belle" Donely Hadfield. She is the woman on the right with the long hair. My Mother as a young girl used to brush her grandmother's hair for hours. My Mother said she liked doing that for her grandmother and her grandmother liked it. I only met her once when she was a very old lady on her deathbed when they trooped up all us sweaty great grandkids to see her once before she died. I think she was about the age I am now!

They brought up all us unwashed ruffian offspring to see her before she died. She was also a very elegant lady from another long line of Pennsylvania Quaker families. During the 1880’s she was an actress. All I remember about her was climbing those stairs to the third floor of the house where she lived with her daughter and seeing this very small bird like white haired lady in a bed. As we ruffians came in one by one she turned her head and smiled slightly and nodded her head every so slowly. I will always remember that moment. Years later a cousin gave me a report card that great-grandmother Isabella Donely (she was Irish) had attend a private girls school during her youth. Her grades were excellent. She was a far cry from my tobacco, “dancing is sinful”, paternal grandmother. 

Now you know why my personality is so fucked. Look at my family tree.







Friday, July 17, 2026

Results Of Doctor's Appointment

 



This morning I saw my urologist to discuss the results of my recent PET-SCAN. 

He was puzzled by the results of my PET-SCAN because even though I recent elevated levels of my PSA score, the PET-SCAN didn't reveal any traces of prostate cancer, even in my prostate.

He immediately suggested that I begin hormone therapy just to "slow down" any chances of the cancer returning. I immediately shut that down saying "No, I'm fatigued enough." I realize he was going through his usual protocol by suggesting this treatment but I'm not having it. I told him why and I related the story of my friend Rich S. who had both. radiation and hormone therapy and is now dealing with a urethra that is destroyed by scar tissue. My doctor seemed taken aback a bit which didn't surprise me. I think most doctors just expect that you go along with their suggestions. 

I told him I've done quite a bit of thinking and research about what I want to do should my prostate cancer return and spread. I told him that I'm 84 years old and I'm not getting any more treatments for anything. I also told him that should my prostate cancer return and spread that I will take advantage of Delaware's new right to die law. I asked him if he "was on board" with my decision because I would need his approval plus another doctor's. He said "Sure, anything you want." Then I told him I have lived a fabulous life and that most of my friends are gone now and I have no family to speak of so what is the point of continuing? Again, he seemed a little uncomfortable with the way this conversation was going. I continued. I told him that I took are of Bill the last three years of his life. How unhappy Bill was. I also told him of my late brother's three year journey trying to stave off his lymphoma cancer only to die cancer free but of organ failure. By now he was just sitting there listening to me. He knew I had made my decision. And that decision was "watchful waiting." A term much used by older men like me who don't want to go through the side effects of prostate cancer treatment. He then suggested that I se him again in six months after I get another blood test. So that's where I stand now.

Then I left in this smoky town that is Milton. The Canadian wildfires smoke has descended on Delaware.

Life goes on.

Have a great day everyone!

Doctor's Appointment This Morning

 



This morning at 10:00 AM I have an appointment with my urologist to review the results of my recent PET-SCAN. 

That PET-SCAN did not indicate that my prostate cancer had spread throughout the rest of my body. That's the good news. The bad news is that my PSA keeps rising at a rapid rate.

Six months ago, when my doctor noticed my PSA score dramatically increasing he wanted to start radiation and hormone therapy treatments to "get me a couple more years." He also wanted to do another biopsy to see if and how much of the cancer was still in my prostate gland. I turned him down immediately on both counts. He then suggested that I get a PET-SCAN and see him again in six months. That's where I am now today.

So today I will inform my doctor that I will not seek any further treatment for my prostate cancer. 

No radiation therapy.

No hormone therapy.

No biopsies.

At eighty-four years old, I am not going to subject this old body to more stressful "treatments" to hold the possible spread of prostate cancer. 

After seeing what my younger brother went through the last three years of his life with "treatments" only to die "cancer free" but of organ failure, that's route I'm not taking

After seeing my friend Rich S., who was first diagnosed with prostate cancer back in 2013 the same time I was only to have it return in 2019 and he got radiation and hormone therapy treatment only to have his urethra destroyed by scar tissue and now he has to pump his urine out of his bladder with a device while the doctors try to rebuild his urethra with flesh from the inside of his cheek, I'll pass on that "treatment" too.

I will tell my doctor the only thing I need from him is a diagnose of six months or less to live, if it should come to that. I may die of something else besides prostate cancer. It is well known that most men die WITH prostate cancer but not OF prostate cancer. 

I will tell my doctor that I'm taking the "Watchful Waiting" route. If and when my prostate cancer spreads, then give me that six month prognosis so I can make plans for my Grand Exit.

This is one thing I know, I will not leave this world the way my brother did or the way Bill did. I will leave this world as I am now. Fully functional and taking care of myself. No prolonged, undignified, dependent on others, exit for me. I know that is the usual way in our Western culture for dying human beings to go. I have decided to go the way I help seven pets of ours go, on our own terms.

Today is just a formality. After my appointment today I go back to my day to day living the best I can with my stooped over body, aches and pains, calcified heart and slipping memory. My main objective right now is not to fall and injure myself.

Have a great day everyone!

Thursday, July 16, 2026

Healing

 

My damaged right paw


Hand is still sore folks. However, it is healing. 

I'm wearing an exam glove now to protect it from water.

I didn't realize how much I used my right hand until That Damn Cat laid his claws in it. I do have to say, he got a good strike. Five deep wounds. Ask me when the next time I will take care of that cat. 

Like NEVER.


Let Them Eat Cake!

  Lemon cake with lemon buttercream icing  Legend has it the late doomed French Queen Marie Antoinette said in response to the French peasan...