Cousins

Danny Hart and me - 2010 Lewes, DE

 Oh how the years fly by! 

One of my many cousins paid me a surprise visit at the hotel in Lewes where I worked in 2010. 

He is the son of my cousin Sandy Hadfield Hart. She is my Mother's first cousin. Her father and my Mother's father (my maternal grandfather) were brothers.

Just this past week I've gotten back into updating my family tree on Ancestry.com. I love doing that. Of course I'll never catch up with all the information I still have to post. I hope some family member can take over when I leave this earth. If not, oh well. I enjoyed keeping the records.

Me and cousin Sandy Hadfield Hart 2009 (Danny's mother)

Rehoboth Beach 2026

Rehoboth Beach Boardwalk tonight

Rehoboth Beach boardwalk tonight.

I captured this picture from my Facebook account. Daily someone posts pictures of Rehoboth Beach.

Each summer I like to go down at least once during the day and, hopefully, once during the evening. If I do the evening it has to be only when Pat is here because I don't drive at night anymore.

The Rehoboth Beach boardwalk is only ten miles down the road from where I live in my "Not Many People Can Afford To Live Here" development of Covington Chase. Fancy name eh?

This year it doesn't look like I'll trod on the Rehoboth Beach boardwalk at night this summer. Perhaps in the fall when Pat is scheduled to visit again. He visits me quarterly. Whereas in the past we used to get together and travel to either Philadelphia, Canada, and Palm Springs. These days, when both Pat and I are cash restricted, we're not making those destinations anymore or as much as we used too. It's expensive, especially now with the economy the way it is (inflation, tariffs, cost of living for those of us on fixed incomes).

I love my home here in Covington Chase. It's nice and quiet but occasionally, I do like to get out and mix it up with the summertime crowd. To experience that "summer vibe." Probably not going to happen this year. 

Where I've Been

 

Bill's little memorial flower patch, right beneath my bedroom window. 

Nowhere.

I'm doing a bit of a reset in my daily routine folks.

There are a couple reasons. 

First, I have to stay within my budget. 

I'm naturally a spendaholic. Comes naturally to me. Been fighting it all my life. I don't have a choice now what with my income the only cash flow here at Casa Tipton-Kelly. 

Since Bill died and I haven't returned to work at the hotel, my household income has been cut in half. I can still manage to pay the necessary bills like electric, heat, Internet, phone, insurance (biggest bills by far) and food (smallest bills but not so much anymore). And lawn maintenance. That's a biggie but I do like a nice lawn and I can't mow it anymore myself so I pay José to mow it once a week. After I'm done paying the necessary bills, there isn't much left over. 

I'm not complaining, just stating facts. I am fortunate in that I don't have a mortgage payment. But with the cost of living going up double digits every year I'm falling behind. 

I admit I suffer the most common reason for being a spendaholic, buying things makes me feel good. I remember watching an Oprah show many years ago. I always used to feel superior when she had a show about people with various addictions. I knew I wasn't one of them until she had a show on spendaholics. I fit every symptom. Every one. It was embarrassing.

So in order not to spend money unnecessarily, I don't go out. Also, another reason I don't go out now as much as I used to is because of the heavy summer tourist traffic here in southern coastal Delaware where I live. Casa Tipton-Kelly borders Route One (Coastal Highway that goes all the way to Florida). That's a racetrack out there folks. If I do have to go out say to the supermarket to replenish supplies I go early Saturday or Sunday morning. The only other times I go out are for my doctor's appointments of which I have plenty now that I am old, feeble and failing. I try to arrange those doctors' appointments in Milton away from the Rehoboth Beach area. Usually my doctors' appointments come in bunches. I just finished a bunch when Pat was down here last month. I'm trying to arrange them again for when he visits again. Otherwise I'm on my own like next month when I have my regular six month VA checkup and my foot doctor appointment which happens every three months (I can't cut my toenails anymore).

So I don't go out much anymore but don't cry for me Argentina. I have plenty to do here at Casa Tipton-Kelly. I have more than enough yard work and there is the fish pond. When it's really hot and humid outside, like it has been most of this summer, I stay inside here and watch You Tube, post to my Threads account, talk to Pat on FaceTime and cook. I used to watch movies on my Netflix account but I suspended my account because I can't find any movies that I like. I wasted my money for far too long with my Netflix account. That suspension was long overdue. Lately I've been getting back into updating my Ancestry.com family tree information, which I've neglected for far too long. I really enjoy updating my family tree. I have tons of information backed up that needs posting and my Ancestry.com is another account that I've subscribed to over the years that I haven't been using. Time to make use of that subscription. 

My only problem now is not to sit too long at this computer because my legs swell up. I asked Alexa to remind me to get up every hour so at least I can move around and get the blood flowing in my legs. My heart blood flow is weak and getting weaker by the day so I have to take these measures.

So there you go folks. That's where I've been. 

Have a great day everyone!

Let Them Eat Cake!

 

Lemon cake with lemon buttercream icing 

Legend has it the late doomed French Queen Marie Antoinette said in response to the French peasants clamoring for food during 18th century France drama. Of course she lost her head over such a flippant response to the legitimate pleadings of the French Great Unwashed.

I used to make cake all the time for me and Bill. However, since he died I have lost my taste for cake. Last night that cake urge came back big time. 

One of my favorite cakes is lemon cake. I've tried all recipes from copycat Starbucks Lemon Loaf to the myriad lemon cake recipes interspersed with multiple ads on my iPhone. I have found the very best recipe is a simple box cake mix. My preference is Duncan Hines Perfectly Moist Cake mix. For the icing I prefer to make my own lemon buttercream icing. 

Last night I succumbed to my desire and whipped up this scrumptious lemon cake. 

Yes, I ate that much last night. First, a modest slice then a "bonus" slice before I went to bed.

Life is good.

The Muggies

 

Yesterday's visitor to my butterfly bush

Another hot, muggy day today.

I can't take the humidity.

Last night it rained. Lightening, thunderstorms, winds. Then this morning, humidity lays heavy on. the landscape here in southern coastal Delaware. 

This is to be expected since I live on a peninsula surrounded by water, much like Florida.

On days like this I stay inside my house. It's too dangerous for me to go outside in this heat and humidity. Literally, too dangerous. A few times I almost didn't make it back inside before I passed out. This is the main reason I pay Jose to mow my lawn weekly, which he does every Wednesday (today).

I could stay all day at my computer here in the house but after a while my lower legs swell up. I have poor blood flow. If I take a daily walk it helps to keep my legs from swelling up. I wish I had one of those suburban malls close by that I could take one of those daily old people walks around the mall.

Last night I was up until after two AM. Usually I don't stay up that late but some nights I'm just not sleepy. I did get a good sleep in though and got up later (about 7:30 AM) that I usually do. Lately I've been waking up at 4:30 or 5 AM and can't get back to sleep. I sense "something" is going on. My appetite has changed too. I'm just not that hungry anymore. I've lost weight but not that much so far. About eight to ten pounds. Maybe this all is just an "old age" thing. But I do feel I'm transitioning to a different phase.

Today I will take a lot of time correcting and updating my family tree on Ancestry.com. Something I've been meaning to do for years but life caught up with me the last four or five years. Three years full-time caregiver for Bill and then over two years grieving for his loss. I'll always grieve over not having Bill in my life to love and take care off but I feel it is time to move on now and get ready for my grand exit. But before that happens, some loose ends to clean up. Of course I'll never have all of them cleaned up but I'll do what I can. I don't want to leave too much of a mess for Pat.

Stay cool today folks!

Memories of Bill - 2015

Apple has a nice feature on my iMac. It's called Memory. It randomly selects photos and videos I've taken and chooses a theme and presents these compilations to me occasionally. A few days ago they presented to me several Memory videos of the years I was taking Bill to his various doctors' appointments and caring for him. The years range from 2015 to 2019 with the exception of the year 2017 which I wasn't able to transfer over other my You Tube account. Occasionally I will be posting these Memory compilation videos to this blog in memory of Bill. 

I don't think there is a day that has gone by since Bill died early Saturday morning February 22, 2024 that I haven't thought of him and missed him terribly. The initial shock of grief has lessened somewhat overtime but I know now this grief over not having Bill in your life will never leave me as long as I am alive on this earth in this lifetime. By posting these videos I honor and keep his memory alive.  

My Family Tree

 This morning I posted a reply to one of my favorite bloggers who wrote about his grandparents. He asked his readers to share their memories of their grandparents. I left a long reply briefly sharing information about the grandparents I knew. I thought my reply was interesting and some of you might find the same. I have posted some of this information overt the years in my twenty plus years of blog posting. I'm posting it again, in this condensed form.

 I only knew one grandparent, my maternal grandfather.

Maternal grandfather - George Hadfield

He was a piece of work. He was descended from his grandfather who came over as an immigrant from Glossip, England to work in the wool mills as he and his family did in England. The year was 1854. A womanizer (married three times), cruel to my Mother growing up and at the end of his life he made everyone miserable by berating them with his Jehovah Witness crap which he discovered late in life. He even brought over a young girl my age during one of his visits thinking that would sway me. I told him “The next time you come bring a young man and I might consider….”. Yes, I did that. Of course he never brought over the young man. I think my Mother explained to him my situation. He never bothered me again.

My paternal grandmother was alive when I was but I don’t remember her because he died when I was two years old. She was an uneducated hillbilly from the western mountains of North Carolina. 

Hester Lewis Tipton, my paternal grandmother

She couldn’t read or write but she did chew tobacco and tell my Mother that dancing was “sinful.” Glad I didn’t know her.

My paternal grandfather died two years before I was born.

My paternal grandfather Fieldon Jacob Tipton with my paternal grandmother and two of their grandchildren (my cousins brother and sister Jackie and Bill Tipton) He was a farmer who along with his wife couldn't read or write but they could produce children (had a Toal of 12 sons)

He was descended from Jonathan Tipton who immigrated to this country from Port Royale, Jamaica after the Great Earthquake of 1692 destroyed his rum barrel stave making business. He had money and brought a lot of land in Maryland. His grandson fought along George Washington during the Battle of King’s Mountain. His name was Major Jonathan Tipton and he was my six time great grandfather. He was also involved in the formation of the state of Tennessee when it broke off from North Carolina. He settled in those mountains of Western North Carolina and proceeded to produce a prodigious batch of Tipton’s of which I am descended from. My paternal grandfather was also an uneducated hillbilly from those same western North Carolina mountains bordering on Tennessee. He was in the lumber business and brought his nine sons to Pennsylvania during the depression because they were starving and he and his sons (two more born in PA) lived on his brother-in-law’s fruit and vegetable farm in southern Chester County as field labor. My father met my Mother during this time. My father had multiple scars on his back from beatings received from his father. Such was the nature of chid discipline in those days. He died in 1939, two years before I was born. My Mother never met him, only knew him as “Mr. Tipton.” After the experience with her father, she probably wouldn’t want to meet him either.

My maternal grandmother died at 29 years old giving childbirth.

My maternal grandmother Ethel Hickman Hadfield. She was the oldest daughter of a well to do pig farmer.  Very educated and quite the independent personality I understand from family lore. Unfortunately she died giving childbirth at home to her sixth child at 29 years old).

She was from a long line of historical Quaker families in Pennsylvania. From her picture she was very elegant. She died before my Mother was two years old. My Mother often talked about her.

There was one great grandmother (my maternal grandfather’s mother) who I met only once. She was on her deathbed.

My great maternal grandmother Isabelle "Belle" Donely Hadfield. She is the woman on the right with the long hair. My Mother as a young girl used to brush her grandmother's hair for hours. My Mother said she liked doing that for her grandmother and her grandmother liked it. I only met her once when she was a very old lady on her deathbed when they trooped up all us sweaty great grandkids to see her once before she died. I think she was about the age I am now!

They brought up all us unwashed ruffian offspring to see her before she died. She was also a very elegant lady from another long line of Pennsylvania Quaker families. During the 1880’s she was an actress. All I remember about her was climbing those stairs to the third floor of the house where she lived with her daughter and seeing this very small bird like white haired lady in a bed. As we ruffians came in one by one she turned her head and smiled slightly and nodded her head every so slowly. I will always remember that moment. Years later a cousin gave me a report card that great-grandmother Isabella Donely (she was Irish) had attend a private girls school during her youth. Her grades were excellent. She was a far cry from my tobacco, “dancing is sinful”, paternal grandmother. 

Now you know why my personality is so fucked. Look at my family tree.