Bill's Health Update After The VA Visit

VA Home Based Primary Care

 Good news folks! 

First, I think I have Bill's swallowing problem solved. I feed him a homemade egg nog solution. He likes it and doesn't choke. And it's easy to make! So easy, why I didn't try this before? No more grinding up Bill's oatmeal to a powder, cooking it then pureeing it to a liquid to serve it to him and he chokes on it. He loves my homemade egg nog and DOESN'T choke on it. 

Bill's eggnog recipe, of course I leave out the booze

This supplemented with Ensure and an occasional banana smoothie should provide Bill with enough nutrition for his daily dietary needs. And, just as I was writing this blog I received a call from a dietician at the VA to schedule a visit with Bill to check his dietary needs. 

Now the next good news, this past Wednesday "Nicki" from the VA Home Healthcare program visited us for the first time to setup Bill for the VA's home health care program.

Bill with "Nicki", his VA home health care nurse

Folks, I cannot tell you how relieved I am to have this help. Nicki is a registered nurse. She checked Bill's vitals and found them all good. She was very pleased that Bill is still able to walk around and can walk up and dow the stairs to his basement bedroom and bathroom. She said his heart rate was good as well as his lungs. And most important of all, she cared. She told me her father is a Vietnam veteran who now has Parkinson's Disease. I am familiar with that disease, my late good friend Bob McCamley had that disease. I saw firsthand how devastating that is. 

Nicki spent about two hours with us explaining the VA's home healthcare program and asking many questions about Bill's health. She said within the next two months Bill and I would be receiving a number of visits from representatives of the VA home health care program. Physical therapists, dietitians, and nurses. She gave me a number to call should I have any questions or emergencies. She told me that someone would answer that number (no menus to scroll through) on the first few rings. This was good to know. This gives me the level of comfort I had with the home hospice program Bill was on before, the knowledge that I could call someone immediately should I have an emergency. But Bill is off the home hospice program now (he was on twice) because he didn't die. This VA program is much better for us, it is geared to making Bill's last days as comfortable as possible here at his home where he is most comfortable. And it makes life easier for me too. I could not bear to think of Bill spending the rest of his life in some warehouse facility, no matter how nice their dining rooms are. That may work for some people but not for me and Bill.

Folks, the challenges of our life here have taken a good turn. And for that I am so thankful to everyone who has made this possible. And I cannot thank the VA enough for all that they have done for Bill. They have been fantastic!

Bill's Healthcare Update

 Bill continues to have his swallowing problems. 

It takes him a good forty-five minutes to an hour to eat his pureed oatmeal in the morning and in the evening. I didn't even feed him is oatmeal this evening. I can't take the sounds of him choking and gagging for that length of time. I usually go outside while he's eating but the weather is getting to cold for that escape.

Coincidentally I received a call from the VA this morning scheduling a first time visit from the VA Home Health Care system. This is a first for us. The last time we were at the VA, I was informed that Bill qualified (because of his age and psychical condition, for the VA Home Health Care program.  Bill would no longer have to travel to the local VA Outpatient Clinic in Georgetown (twelve miles away) to visit his doctor.

I was informed that this first time visit will take a couple of hours. Visiting will be a VA doctor and a nurse. This visit is to setup Bill.  I have to have all his medications ready. They will give him a comprehensive physical. At this time I will ask them what I can do about feeding Bill. I'm even ready to take on the feeding tube in the stomach option now, seeing how Bill is struggling with swallowing liquids.

Another increasing problem we have is Bill's mental condition at the end of day. He has the classic "Sundowner's Syndrome." He's so confused at the end of the day which for him starts about five PM. It's especially hard on me because Bill can't process what I'm saying to him. He still knows who I am and where he is but that's about it. The rest of what's going on around him confuses him. Even taking his pills and going downstairs to his bedroom. 

Again and again I'll say it. I am so thankful that I can take care of Bill here at his home where he is comfortable. Eventually he will pass on and I hope when that time comes it is peaceful for him here at his home. I just can't bear to think of him in a "facility" or a hospital. The last few years he's been in the hospital too many times already. Even though they took excellent care of him at those hospitals and rehab facilities there truly is no place like home. 

Today was a beautiful fall day. While I was taking advantage of this glorious day around noon time, I saw where Bill came out for a walk. I've posted that video at the beginning of this blog post. This is what it is all about now folks. Enjoying and treasuring whatever time we have left together. 

Traitors

 

Members of Congress who voted to decertify Joe Biden as president in spite of a free and fair election. TRAITORS! COWARDS!

Do you recognize these people? 

They are currently members of Congress (House and Senate) who voted to decertify President Biden's election.

They are all cowards who took an oath to the Constitution and lied. They are more concerned about their own jobs than their professed oath to the Constitution when they took office.

One positive thing I will say about Trump, his bullying and intimidation tactics have exposed the true nature of these Republican politicians.

Shame on them.

Shame on the voters who put them in office.

Shame on our country.

Shame on me because I used to be a Republican.

Hard to believe but way back in 1968 I wrote my college term paper on "The Emerging Republican Majority." This when the Democrats had held power in the House of Representatives for forty years. I never in my lifetime thought the Republicans would take control of the House. But the Republicans have proven "Be careful of what  you wish for."

I changed my voter registration twenty years ago when the George W. Bush administration tried (unsuccessfully) to take away my veteran's health care benefits. A promise was made to me when I joined the Army in 1960 that I had "lifetime healthcare....if I needed it."  In the year 2000, I was jobless and I needed my healthcare. Thank God I had the VA because I had to have several surgeries. If George W. Bush and Karl Rove had their way I would have been on my own. I would have been fucked. However, there was such an outcry that the cowardly Congress at that time backed down and grandfathered me and other veterans like me and I was able to keep my VA health care.

Now the Republicans agenda is to eliminate Social Security and Medicare. 

These cowards are a grave danger to our country.

And they now have a Messiah who they are totally controlled by because they WANT TO KEEP THEIR JOBS. That is their first priority.

THEY ARE ALL COWARDS!

THEY ARE ALL TRAITORS!

Am I worried about the increasing crime in our cities? Of course I am. 

Is Nancy Pelosi the greatest danger to our country? ARE YOU SERIOUS???????

The greatest danger to our country are these cowards. Look at them and remember them. Generations from now they will teach in our classrooms how these cowards almost caused the ruination of our democracy for their own craven self interests. 

Caregiving 2.0

 

My cousin Bud (left) with his mother and my other cousin Tom
(both my aunt and my cousin Tom are gone now)

Yesterday presented new challenges in my role of caregiving for Bill. 

Bill has had trouble swallowing for several years now. His esophagus is shot. 

During his last hospital stay they of course noticed that problem when they tried to feed him regular food. Bill cannot eat regular food. First he has no teeth. He stopped wearing his false teeth almost three years ago when he has his first strokes. He only wore the top ones anyway. 

The doctors advised me to either have an operation to replace is esophagus or have a feeding tube inserted into his stomach. Neither one of these are feasible options at Bill's age. He's closing in on one hundred years. First would the operations be successful and if they were successful, how long would it take him to recover from the operation? 

A feeding tube in his stomach? I don't think so. First of all Bill would lose one of his few pleasures in life, tasting his main course (morning and evening) of oatmeal which I puree with a banana and oat milk. Then there is the added caregiving tasks that would fall on me. Inserting the feeding tube, taking it out. I looked up the side effects. Diarrhea is one of them. No thank you. As it is I change his Depends daily now which usually heavy with his urine. By the way, the Depends work great for containing urine. Just so you know in case you're ever entering that lovely territory in your life's journey. Just saying.

So what I do is first grind up Bill's oatmeal to a powder then I add water and put it in the microwave to cook it. Out of the microwave I put more oat milk in it and a very ripe banana. Bill loves bananas. Then I puree the whole concoction. It's now liquid which Bill drinks.

Bill usually chokes when he drinks his oatmeal/banana puree but lately he's really been having problems. Struggling with gagging and sometimes throwing up what he just swallowed. This isn't a pretty sight folks. I can't stand the sounds so I almost always go out for my daily walk while Bill struggles to eat his oatmeal puree. 

Yesterday I was gone for about forty minutes taking a leisurely walk around Casa Tipton-Kelly and talking to Pat on FaceTime.  I was surprised when I came back in to hear Bill still coughing and gagging on his oatmeal. Oh how I wish I could arrange for him to have a new esophagus. I've often told him that he is being punished for leading such a healthy life. His body is just wearing out. He doesn't have cancer or diabetes or any other illness, just a body that is worn out. Just like his old Jeep that went for almost twenty-five years then a few more years after he gave it up to the garage where he used to get it repaired. 

Bill hasn't eaten meat in over forty years. He's not one of these self proclaimed vegetarians who broadcast their vegetarian. He just stopped eating meat. For many years he only ate peas. Yes, peas. But when his esophagus gave out he had to give up peas. Oh, he also ate a lot of candy but the past year or so he doesn't even eat candy. He does like sugar though. I have to put three heaping tablespoons of sugar on his twice daily serving of oatmeal/banana puree (I forgot to mention that earlier). He also liked ice cream but he stopped eating ice cream (only vanilla) about a year and a half ago. He does like Oreo Thin Lemon cookies which he eats all day. 

Because he doesn't eat grease laden food and meat is the reason I think he's lasted this long. He stopped smoking back in 1967, the same time I stopped smoking after seven years of smoking. I think Bill had smoked for about twenty years. 

So yesterday presented a big challenge. If I can't feed him his oatmeal every day, what to feed him? A banana smoothie? I do feed him two egg custards a day. This for his protein which has made a big difference in the edema in his lower legs. His legs are doing great. He walks every morning by making about twenty "laps" around our finished basement. His bedroom is off to the side in our basement. 

We tried talking it over last night but Bill is difficult to have a conversation with at the end of the day. He suffers from what is known as "Sundowners." Bill doesn't have dementia but he does wind down big time at the end of the day. It's almost fruitless to try and have a conversation with him late afternoon and early evening. Last night was one of those frustrating attempts at a discussion with him. After much frustration I finally gave up. 

This morning we had that conversation again and we both came to the conclusion that his mouth is too dry. Lately I've been having the same problem, a dry mouth. I sleep with my trap open thus when I wake up in the morning my mouth is like a parched desert. This has affected wearing my partial dentures. At my last visit to my dentist she notice that problem and she advised me to get this tablets to take before I go to bed. It helps prevent dry mouth. They work! Now I can wear my partials and enjoy tasting my food again. I think Bill is having the same problem but I can't give him those tablets. Too confusing for him to figure out how they stick to the roof of your mouth. So what he does instead is take one of his lemon cookies and put it under his tongue. So far that seems to help. 

I tell you folks, I wasn't made out to be a caregiver. But like my cousin Bud (same age as me) who took care of his invalid mother at home for the last few years of her life (she lived to be in her nineties too), when I asked him "How do you do it?" He said "You do what you have to do Ronnie!" He not only had to deal with his mother's early dementia but he had to change her colostomy bag every day. God, at least I don't have to do THAT. Thank God Bill can still go to the bathroom by himself. Haven't had a Number Two accident in his Depends for about a year now. Another friend of mine has to deal with his wife who has a myriad of problems. In addition to her problems she's in constant pain. Thank God Bill isn't in pain. Although it sounds painful when he choking while eating his food he says it's not. It's painful for me to hear him though. But that is me, old selfish me. Then here is my longtime friend who is in the final stages of his ALS. I can't even talk to him on FaceTime which I did for years when he was first diagnosed with ALS nine years ago. He can't move his legs at all, totally bedridden. Can't even talk now. Just gibberish. He has a full-time paid caregiver via Medicaid who comes in six days a week to take care of him at his home.

Maybe we're living too long folks. What do you think?

Let's Do It Again

 

Little "Ronnie Tipton", 1st Grade 1946

Do you believe in reincarnation? I do.

I think I'm about to repeat my life cycle again. This picture, which I have posted several times before on this blog, is my first grade elementary school photo. The year was 1946. I was five years old.

I remember clearly when I was four years old, before I started first grade, that I was beginning my journey again. 

Now that I am approaching the end of this life cycle (and believe me, I feel the end coming soon), I am actually looking forward to what awaits me.

Of course I don't believe in the conventional wisdom of Heaven and Hell. That's all man made up propaganda to keep the Great Unwashed Masses under control. Please don't take offense to those of you who find comfort in your religion but this is my belief. The only thing that makes sense to me. 

I do believe this body we posses is only an "overcoat". We wear it until it wears out or is accidentally destroyed then the spirit or soul or whatever you want to call it that inhabits this frame of a body is set loose to the endless ends of the universe and beyond. I hate to burst anyone's bubble but there is no old man with a white beard clothed in a white toga (a la Charleton Heston) awaiting us at St. Peter's Gate to pass judgement on us. Again, all man made myth to control the masses.

What I do know is that I have had quite a journey in this life cycle. In a few weeks I'll be 82 years old. Way past my Sell By Date. Most of my friends and relatives that I knew are long gone. Bill and I survive but once Bill goes (he's 95 now and not long to go for him either), I will feel tremendously alone. 

These days I do a lot of thinking about my past memories. So many good memories. So many good things that happened to me. Me, of no particular talent or intelligence but I do on occasion have a knack for endearing myself to some people. 

Of course I've had a few unpleasant memories but nothing of any consequence. Lots of close calls. So lucky. 

One of the main things I will remember about my life is the kindness often shown to me by so many in my path through this iteration of life. I will never forget them. I am so appreciative of them, especially now knowing the positive role they played in my life.

I was triggered to do this post this morning but a Facebook post of an acquaintance who challenged her readers to remember their fifth grade teacher. I remember all my teachers folks. ALL OF THEM. 

I REMEMBER EVERYBODY.

I have had the question asked "Do you have any regrets?"

Absolutely!

I sure do wish I could have a Do Over on a lot of choices I made but then again, that is what life is about isn't it? Always learning and trying to do better. 

So the day will come when I close my eyes, never to open them again in this body. This body which is increasingly failing me. The one thing I always had was walking. The last year or so I find that I am losing that ability to walk normally, like I did for the past eighty or so years.

I am so thankful that I haven't lost my vision like Bill. That I can still swallow my food unlike Bill who chokes on every swallow of liquified oatmeal and egg custard that is his only food intake now. 

My brain is still working reasonably well but I am definitely more forgetful, misplacing things. Forgetting names (but not my elementary school teachers)!

"Another One Bites The Dust" is playing right now on my playlist that I use to accompany me when I write these blog posts. How appropriate! 

I'm ready. 

Thoughts On A Rainy Fall Saturday

 

Life goes on here at Casa Tipton-Kelly. 

Yesterday I had my annual HVAC heater checkup. Whereas in the past these annual checkups have resulted in little if no cost, this year I wasn't so lucky. I wasn't surprised after being hit with so many unexpected large bills this year. This visit set me back $1,652. 

Here is the breakdown folks

Install 24v Plasma Pure Air Purifier     $883.00

Install new burner(s), flame sensor & igniter in gas furnace                                                    769.00

"Steve" (the service person), showed me pictures of my old burner and it did need replaced. The air purifier also needed replacement. The picture of the old one looked bad, probably why I've been having so many sneezing attacks and runny noses the past several months. 

I could tell the difference almost immediately. The heating element is working much more efficiently and I can breath again. So I don't feel like I was "taken" of these replacements weren't necessary. I can justify this expense. I don't feel as bad about this as I did as replacing my perfectly good tires on my car for almost a $1,000 because of a leak caused by a big nail could no longer be contained.

Then there is the situation in Israel. I've watched a lot of coverage included too many graphic photos and videos of the death and destruction. What an awful situation and there seems to be no solution to that problem they're having over there. I just can't imagine living like that. And who is to fault? Sure, it's "complicated" but can we say religion has a lot to do with it? Sure, we can. 

Look, I was brought up Christian in the Southern Baptist church. I fell away from the church when I was about eleven years old when I had the shit scared out of me by a red faced, foaming at the mouth Pentecostal screaming at me and everyone else at his Sunday service that I was attending with one of my favorite aunts. 

"YOU'RE ALL SINNERS!

"YOU'RE BORN IN SIN!" 

"YOU WILL BE SINNERS UNTIL YOU DIE!"

Yep, that what this religious hate zealot was screaming at a very impressionable eleven year old who heretofore attended Sunday school classes where I was taught all about "Christian values." 

You know, "Love thy neighbor" and "Turn the other cheek" propaganda. Didn't take me too long to figure out "What chance to I have? I'm just a sinner."

I watch the TV and see these Muslims killing innocents including children and babies. The oh so holy Muslims who believe all other religions are infidels and should be put to death. Fuck them!

Then I watch the Israelis do exactly what the Germans did to them during World War II. To do "collective punishment" of Palestinians who live in Gaza for the atrocities committed by the Hamas terrorists. Fuck them. 

I've come to believe that religion has caused more death and destruction in this world than all the famines combined. Look at what the European colonizers did to the New World Indians when they "emancipated" them. They just about wiped out the Indians converting them to their false Christian religion.

I can understand those who find comfort in religion and that's the way they get through their life. What I don't understand or accept is those who condemn others who don't believe in their religion. I don't force my atheism on anybody. "Live and let live" is my modus operandi in life.  

So I will continue to live out the end of my days on this earth here in this peaceful corner of earth where President Biden's summer home is only four miles away from Casa Tipton-Kelly. And I will continue to be thankful that I can live a peaceful life here in spite of our many physical challenges as our bodies age. 

But my heart goes out to all those innocents who are caught in the crossfire on both sides in the Israeli and Palestinian conflict. I hope for peace but I know in my heart that isn't possible. That situation has been that way my whole life and it isn't going to miraculously change in whatever time I have left.

COVID Booster Shots Today!

 

Bill and me November 2011 in Milton, DE at a friend's house

At 2:15 this afternoon both Bill and I are scheduled for our COVID booster shots at our local Walgreen's.

Actually I'm 2:15 and Bill is 2:30. 

I forget which number of COVID shots this is but we might as well get them, as old as we are.

Just last year a friend of mine died from COVID complications. I was surprised because I often saw him and his husband at our local Food Lion, where I do the majority of my grocery shopping. Walgreen's is in the same shopping strip. 

A couple of weeks ago I encountered his now widowed husband (Scott) in Food Lion. I felt so bad for him. Like me and Bill, he and David have been together forever. When you're with someone a long time (this year it will be sixty years for me and Bill), you expect to live forever and then when you do die (which we all do), you expect to go together. I expressed my sympathy to Scott and moved on before I got too emotional. He doesn't need my tears.

Even though Bill is much weaker than he was two and a half years ago before his strokes, he's still "Bill." I just can't imagine my life without him. After all, he's been in my whole adult life since I was twenty-two years old. Yes, I was ONCE twenty-two years old. Bill rescued me from a potential life of debauchery, alcoholism, drug addiction and many failed relationships. Bill has been the one steady rock in my life. Yes, I am one of the fortunate few to have someone like Bill in my life. I still can't imagine my life without Bill. 

So this afternoon we will get our COVID booster shots, which (hopefully) will enable us to live a few more months or maybe even years of a nice peaceful life her in southern coastal Delaware.

The Crack Down of ATVs in Philadelphia

One of the main reasons I moved from our seven acre property in Pennsylvania was because of ATV's and dirt bikes.

Bill and I used to live in center city Philadelphia. I grew tired of the police sirens, being harassed by homeless young black men and the high taxes so we moved to seven undeveloped acres thirty-seven miles west of Philadelphia, near Downingtown PA where I grew up. 

I wanted to move (Bill didn't) because I wanted peace and quiet. It didn't take too long until my neighbor who owned the four acre parcel next to our seven acres, sold his land. The new people who moved in subdivided that four acre lot into two two acre lots. The parents were in the front acreage and the daughter and her family were in the back two acres which adjoined our seven acres. 

Unfortunately for us her dad had an ATV which he used to use for deer hunting in mid state Pennsylvania, where he was originally from. He didn't need his ATV to hunt at his new home but he found another use for it. One of his sons bought another ATV and his son-in-law brought TWO more ATV's. What did they do with them? They created a dirt track around the back two acres adjoining our property and would race each other. Yes, I moved to the country for peace and quiet and what do I get? 

FOUR ATV'S RACING AROUND A DIRT TRACK FOR HOURS ON END. 

And that folks is why I hate ATV's. 

Thank goodness I moved out of Philadelphia before the dirt bikes and ATV's took over the city streets.

I hope the Philadelphia police confiscate EVERY DAMN ATV AND DIRT BIKE and destroy every one. 

Some people just exist to make life miserable for others. 

I'm not religious but I thank God that there is peace and quiet in this neighborhood where I live now. Oh we get the occasional motorcycle hordes racing up and down Route One which adjoins our property (no mufflers of course) but not the HOUR AND HOURS (sometimes as long as four hours on a Saturday) at our property in Pennsylvania. 

One of the things I value and appreciate so much, especially at this time of my life is peace and quiet.

I moved out of Philadelphia to get away from the daily police sirens. I moved out of our home in Pennsylvania to get away from the ATV's and dirt bikes. Here, I will only move away on a gurney with a sheet over my head.

Mom Confronts Armed Biker Who Smashed Car Window

It took a mom protecting her children to finally wake up the Philadelphia police to enforce the law against dirt-bikes and ATV's riding on public streets in Philadelphia.

I'm from Philadelphia and lived and worked in Philadelphia many years. Before COVID and my caretaking responsibilities which began two and a half years ago, I used to visit Philly twice a year. I noticed the last time I visited that ATV's and dirt-bikes were riding down Chestnut Street, right in center city. WTF? I thought it was ILLEGAL to ride that type of vehicle on a city street or any public roads! Well, IT IS! But, the Philadelphia Police under the leadership (?) of Denise Outlaw obviously decided to look the other way. WTF? I lived in Philadelphia when Frank Rizzo was the police commissioner and then mayor. While Frank Rizzo had his many detractors one thing you could count on with Mayor Rizzo was such activity would never be tolerated. 

I consider myself a liberal in most respects but I am definitely against this kind of relaxation of the laws that permit this kind of terrorism to happen, jumping and breaking the back window of this mother's car when her two young children were in the back seat. Thank God no one was injured. This could have quickly have escalated into a real tragedy.

As a result of this incident the Philadelphia Police have finally taken action to remove ALL of the illegal dirt-bikes and ATV's from the Philadelphia City streets. It's about time.

Now to lock up those gangs of looters who are stealing and vandalizing those center city stores.