Monday, February 09, 2015
Getting My Affairs in Order
The recent deaths of two of my longtime friends and my estrangement from my family members, the time has come for me to redo my will. I called this morning and made an appointment to have new wills drawn up for both me and Bill as well as new powers of attorney and health care directives.
During his life I often asked my late friend Ed "Do you have a will?" He said he did not because once he was dead he didn't care what happened to him or his estate. Well, that's him. In my case I do care. I care who has the power of attorney if I am disabled. I care who inherits my estate (modest for sure) that I have worked my whole life for and am now working to keep me in relative comfort until my time comes. I care.
I am presently estranged from my brothers. Their problem is that I am openly gay. They have a gay brother who decided to publicly get married and not apologize for it. Oh, it was all right all those years when I had my "friend" Bill. All so "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" but now that I am in the open with it, publicly, that is not acceptable to both of my conservative brothers, or their families. I put on a family reunion, they don't come even though one brother and nephew lived on a few miles away. I never receive birthday or Christmas cards from anyone in my family. No one. Nada. Zip. Nothing. Unbelievable isn't it? My "crime?" I got publicly married to Bill.
They're still my brothers and I love them just the same in spite of their willful ignorance of the reality of my life. They will never change and I will never change. So what am I going to do at the end of my life if I go down slow like my former friend Ed? Have one of them care for their "choose the wrong lifestyle and embarrass us" brother and uncle or someone who really cares for me? I think you know the answer. I know the answer.
So it's done, and I will not have that on my mind if and when it is my time to take that slow trip from this life.
Hard decisions folks, hard decisions.
Tomorrow I get back to posting photos and videos of my wonderful ten day state in Lotus Land, with people who like me just the way I am. With people who care for me and don't look upon me as a defective human being.
This too I will put behind me just as I am putting behind me some other recent developments in my life. I don't know how much time I have left (hopefully many, many years) but this I do know. I will live it on my own terms and anyone who doesn't like it can go their way.