|Me posing make believe like I'm changing our flat tire on Skyline Drive in Virginia the summer of 1965|
No, I'm not talking about a 70 year old former stripper, I'm talking about getting a flat tire in one's vehicle.
Although said photo atop this blog would indicate that I am changing a flat tire on Bill's Chevy Corvair (remember that lemon?) sans 1965, I was actually only doing my "I'm not a doctor but I play one on TV" pose. I am proud to admit that I've never changed a flat tire in my life. NEVER. Why do you think I joined AAA in 1982? Of course I've never had a flat tire since then and my dues have gone from $25 a year to now $89 a year but you know, JUST IN CASE.
I remember an instance when I was in the Army at Ft. Meade in Maryland. A few of my friends and I were going to take a jaunt to nearby Baltimore. All of my friends (all four of them) happened to be gay. Yes, that's another whole story to be told at another time but I always thought it was ironic that before I went into the Army at age 18 I was the only "homosexual" in the world. Hey, I was from a small town and the world "homosexual" was only furtively whispered with scowled faces. But I digress.
So here we were on that humid August night in 1962, five light in the combat boots, taking a gay expedition to Baltimore. About halfway there, as we were crossing a bridge whose name I have forgotten, and we hear a "flap! flap! flap!" OMG! Our driver Doug says "Hey guys I think we have a flat!" The rest of us; me, my friend Ron H., Sal and (yes) another Ron P. all look at each other in askance. The term "WTF?" wasn't even invented at that time but if it was we all would have said it unison. As it were, we all just looked at each other saucer eyed.
Finally someone (me) said "I can't change a flat tire." Someone else (Ron H.) said "I don't know how to change a flat tire either." Sal said "Don't look at me, I don't know how to change one either." And yes, Ron P. expressed a similar response. Hey folks, a carload of gay guys and NO ONE KNEW HOW TO CHANGE A TIRE.
After a few moments of stunned silence (when we realize just how GAY we were), we started to laugh. That's when I said "I like grease on a man's hands but not mine." Similar jocular one liners were made by the others. It really was a joke folks. A carload full of SOLDIERS and NONE OF US knew or wanted to change that flat tire.
So I guess you're all wondering what happened to us. Yep, you guessed it. A car came by with two women. WACs. Yep, they changed our flat tire. Don't tell anybody.
|Wac's to the rescue|