Gay Pride Month

June is Gay Pride month. 

I've only been in two "gay pride" parades or marches in my life. 

The first one was in 1979. It was the first LGBT march for equal right in Washington D.C. 

1979 March on Washington D.C. - I'm somewhere in that mass of people - oh how I wish I had taken my camera. What was I thinking?

I lived in Philadelphia at the time.  I was told a bus was taking folks down to Washington at no cost to participate in the march. At first I hesitated to go, fearing for my safety and embarrassing my family when I was arrested, which I sure would happen. I was so sure, I didn't take my camera with me because I didn't want it confiscated and destroyed. I thought what would be the point of taking pictures only to have them confiscated?

I was very nervous when I rode that bus full of participants in the march. The bus was so full, there were people sitting and lying on the floor.

When we arrived in Washington, the ominous quiet and sense of danger in the air was palatable. I'm not ashamed to admit, I was afraid but I was determined to march.

Several things from that march stand out so clearly. First was how the march was lined with D.C. cops lining the parade route, sitting on their tiny motorcycles. I thought at the time how comical they looked on those motorcycles who were so much smaller than the gay bikers in the march. 

Another thing I remember was how many "normal" marchers there were. I was expecting the Sisters of the Perpetual Indulgence 



drag queens and biker dudes but 98% of the marchers were just plain guys like me. Oh sure, those marchers were there but the greatest majority of marchers were like me, just regular gay guys (and women).  

And the last thing I remember was the deadly looks of some of the straight tourists who lined our march.  That "look", like we were some foreign species. That "look" seemed to say "There go THOSE QUEERS".  "How dare they show their faces in public."

My fears of being arrested were greatly overrated. The police were polite and protective. Sure, we got the dagger stares from some of the onlookers of the parade but for the most part, the parade was uneventful.

Oh, one more thing I remembered was how many people were there, at least a half a million. All those gay people and others who supported our cause. Man did that make me feel good. I wasn't alone. 

When I got home I expected to find that coverage but was disappointed to discover that most of the news media fixed on the extreme marchers. There they were, the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence and the leather thonged clad biker dudes. Oh well.

In 2009, the 30th anniversary of the first march, another march was planned. Again, a free bus ride was provided from Rehoboth Beach (where I now lived) to Washington D.C. 

I had no hesitation this time about attending this march. And I even took my camera. In fact, I took over seven hundred pictures. Some of which are in this video I put together the beginning of this blog post. Yes, I took all these photos. I did miss taking videos though, iPhone weren't out yet in 2009.

What a difference this march was! In fact, there was another march for a different cause going on at the same time. This time there was no need to protect our parade route with D. C. cops on tiny motor cycles. 

The air was festive.

Smiles abounded. 

Even the tourists went about their business of touring. There were no stares of disgusts some thinking "What do THEY do in bed?"  

I won't be participating in any gay pride marches this month. Not that I have anything against them, but unless I get a free bus ride and have a friend to go with, I'll let others express their freedom to be who they are. 

Me and my friend Bob C. resting after the march near the Capitol - it was a beautiful day for a march

Peace Marches

The Charlottesville, Virginia peace march reminded me of the first march I ever attended in my life. 

I'm not a marcher even though I was in marching band in high school.

Downingtown High School Marching Band 1958 - that's me in the back with one of the Sousaphones

 
I've only participated in two public marches in my lifetime. One was the very first gay right march in Washington D.C. That march took place October 14th, 1979.  It was called "The March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights." 

I did not seek out this march.  I was asked to attend as a result of several letters to the editors of newspapers that I had written about gay rights.  Remember back in 1979 being gay was illegal in almost all of the United States. If you were gay and made love to your partner, who just happened to be of the same sex, you were committing a crime. 

In 1979 I lived in center city Philadelphia. And as I said previously, I was asked if I wanted to go on the bus to Washington D.C. to participate in this march. I hesitated because I had often been the target of harassment and brutality from homophobes in Philadelphia and other places I had lived simply because I lived openly as a gay man.

Me with my niece Karen in Rittenhouse Square, Center City, Philadelphia 1979 - note he bell bottom pants!

After much though, I decided to go.  To say I was nervous would be an understatement.  I was scared to death.  I was certain I would be arrested with many others just for publicly displaying myself as a gay man and demeaning equal rights. I was so afraid, I didn't even take my camera (a decision which I have regretted many times since then) because I was certain that once I was arrested my camera would be confiscated and/or destroyed.  but rest assured that somewhere someone has photos of me marching.

All the way down for the 2 1/2 hour drive from Philly to D.C., I had butterflies in my stomach. When we arrived at the beginning of the parade route, I was stunned by all the other gay people attending the parade.  I have to tell you, I felt a tremendous sense of liberation from seeing all those folks attending and getting ready to march to demand equal rights.  And just about everyone one of us, a branded criminal in the eyes of American justice for loving who we love.

The parade route was lined by D.C. policemen on motorcycles.  I noted with some disdain at how small their motorcycles were, not at all the size of my leather friends' motorcycles at the 247 Bar.  I thought "Really guys, is this the BEST you can do?"

We began the march. All was eerily silent except of the hum of the police motorcycles, revved and ready to quell any attacks on us by the glaring folks watching us on the sidelines.  Believe me, there were glares.  How dare we, as gay people, show out perversion to the whole world.

Ever notice how genuinely happy gay people are when they finally come out - liberation! The yoke of oppression is off!

By the way, another thing that surprised me was that 95% and more of the march participants were just regular folks.  Oh sure, there were contingents of motor cycle guys, and the ever present drag queens but almost all of the marchers were just "regular folks".  Longish hair over their ears and sideburns (this was the 70's after all) but most of the marchers could easily "pass" for straight folk.

Just some of the "regular folks" marching in the first gay equality parade in Washington D.C. October 14, 2009

The parade was peaceful, much to my relief. There were no attacks, no violence. I wasn't getting beaten and arrested, what relief.  Many speeches followed. 

At the parade I rediscovered old friends who I had lost contact with.  Friends who had moved to other parts of the country. Oh how I wish I had my camera with me.  

At the end of the day I boarded the bus back to Philly, feeling very good at having participated in this demand for equality. 

One thing that worried me though. I had expected to see my face on the TV news and cover of Newsweek and/or Time. The parade was that massive (over 150,00 participants).  

I'm in that crowd on the Washington Monument Mall folks. Do a "Where's Waldo?" and see if you can find me. I still remember vividly benign that crowd and running into my old friend Richard. Hey, in Gay Life it's always "Six Degrees of Separation." 

However, I was much surprised the next day to discover the TV news coverage of the march was minimal. Oh sure, they showed the drag and leather queens on TV (who were a VERY small part of the march) but not much of the thousands of just "regular" folk who attended and participated in the march.


Fast forward thirty years later.  I attended my second "peace" march, this also of equality. Oh my how thirty years had changed the attitude of the public towards gays. Gone was Anita Bryant's Crusade to eliminate gays from the face of the planet. By the way, whatever happened to Anita Bryant anyway?  Now our march was a festive affair.  Gone was the tension. Gone was the fear of violence and being arrested.  And yes, this time I took my camera.  

My friend Bob and I boarding the bus in Rehoboth Beach to Washington D. C. to attend the march October 11, 2009, almost thirty years to the date after I attended my first march in Washington D.C. for gay equality

This time we didn't have Washington D. C. police on their mini motorcycles lining the route, to protect us from potential violence.  In fact, this march there was also another march taking place at the same time.  We weren't even the main event!  Imagine that? 

Our trip was sponsored by Camp Rehoboth, that's me the Tall One with my camera (I took it this time!) strapped across my torso - ready to march

This time there were not people lining the streets giving us evil glares. This time folks just went about their business as usual, happily in sync with just more marchers in their fair city. I have to tell you folks, that really felt liberating. 

Me walking down Pennsylvania Avenue with my beads and gay flags to the White House, Liberated Ron!

What a wonderful day we had. Beautiful weather, happy folks, no threat of violence in the air. I was so glad my friend Bob suggested that I go along with him on this trip.  Interesting, that both trips I didn't seek but was asked to go. 

Yep, that's us marching past the White House.

Funny thing, I'm wondering now if I could even physically make the march, what with my arthritis.  But you know folks, I would if I got the invitation again.

Another interesting fact about yours truly, I have yet to march in one of those gay pride parades. I was never asked. Someone ask me. I'll go.

Never too old to march for a good cause

Passing the Baton

(Image is of my hand shaking Delaware governor Markell's hand  April 11, 2013)

If there was one lasting image of my testimony in support of marriage equality yesterday at the Delaware State legislature it is the image of the young gay man who was waiting with extended hand to shake mine after my emotional testimony.  This young man, with nary a wrinkle on his fresh, young face; locked his laser stare on me, and a proud yet determined smile on is face that seem to say "Thank you for fighting the good battle against discrimination the last 50 years."  

I had wanted to make a quick exit (thank goodness the door was right behind me) after my emotional testimony because, quite frankly, I was embarrassed.  But this young man's fixed stare and smile said to me "Oh no, I'm going to thank you before you leave."  I hesitated and then shook his hand.  He smiled as I did.  

As I was waiting outside Legislative Hall for Bill to pick me up (we waited outside in the parking lot during my testimony), I thought of the me and that young gay man presented.  It's a shame my friend Mark H. wasn't around to capture "The Moment" but I have captured that moment in my mind forever. I have thus passed on the baton to a younger generation of gay men (and women) who will not have to go through what Bill and I (and thousands of other gay people) did up until this time, when gays are increasingly being afforded the same dignity and legal protections of other Americans.  

• This young man can join the Army and not have to lie about who he is just in order to serve his county.
• This young man can get a job anywhere and not have to worry about someday getting a boss who is a homophobe and fires him from his job for no other reason than he is gay.
• This young man doesn't have to worry about where he can live.  He can live in a neighborhood where the neighbors don't encourage their kids to stand on the border of his property and chant "Fags get out!" as happened to me and Bill when we lived in Pennsylvania.
• This young man can lay on the beach with his friends and not have to worry about a gang of young toughs threatening to beat them up just because he is on the beach with his friends.
• This young man doesn't have to worry about drunken teenagers waiting for a gay bar to close so they can taunt the gay men and women coming out of that bar so they would have an excuse to "bash a gay."
• This young man doesn't have to worry about a gang of young straight guy, fueled by too much beer and testosterone to try and hit him with their car as they yell "Hey you f--cking fag!"
• This young man won't have to endure having his parents trying to hospitalize him to "cure" him of his "gayness" like I did.
• This young man won't have to see some of his former friends make fun of him when they have a birthday party and all the candles don't get blown out on the birthday cake and one of them says "Hey, maybe we can get Ron to blow them out, he knows how to blow!" and then everyone laughs.
• This young man won't have to suffer the embarrassment of having some of his former male co-workers make a visit to his apartment on a Saturday night after they found out he was gay.  

All these things and many more have happened to me, including the disdainful, disgusted looks and expressions from to many of my relatives when they found out I was gay.  Maybe, just maybe he won't have to live through the 71 years of being considered "less than."  Wouldn't that be a wonderful thing?

I have been very blessed to live the past 49 years of my adult life in a loving and committed relationship with my longtime partner and friend, Bill.   Both of us have had to lie, hide and always structure our life to minimize the danger to us both physically and economically.  We have lived most of our life in fear and lies.  Looking into that young man's determined eyes yesterday, as he shook my hand, I knew that he would not have to live that life.  And that my friends gives me a wonderful feeling.  

I always knew there was a reason why I was born the way I was born.  I never regretted being born gay.  My only concern was how to survive.  Never once did I not want to be what I am.  Many of us have wondered what our purpose in life was.  I've often thought the same thing myself.  I keep coming back to the same answer.  Love.  Yes, folks it is all about love.  And yesterday that is what I saw.  And I am so thankful that a confluence of serendipitous circumstances permitted me to be a part of that change.  

Yesterday with that handshake I passed the baton to the next generation of gay men and women. The phrase that comes to my mind now is "my work here is done."  I wondered where that came from.  First thought was "The Lone Ranger."  And guess what?  I was right!

Here is the quote:

"At the end of every episode, the Lone Ranger would say "my work here is done now" and then he'd slip off and we'd hear the iconic "Hi-ho Silver away!" line as people are left asking who that masked man was."

I can now rest.  I can go home. "My work here is done now."

Respect Part 2

One aspect in my previous post on respect that I didn't go into deeply enough was how, as a gay man, respect is especially important to me.  We need to drill down on this.

Me (far right) with my father and two younger brothers - I always wanted him to like me - obviously he never did even at this young age even though I yearned for his attention - 1948 - his favorite was my younger brother John to the far left - my middle brother Isaac also lacked attention from our father - the body language says it all

Growing up I was constantly belittled by my father.  As an adult I came to realize that he really didn't want children.  My brothers and I were a hinderance to him.  Since I was the oldest, I received the brunt of his disdain.  

Me (on left) during my self-hating years when I was nothing - a too tall, skinny kid with a too big nose and a cauliflower ear which my father never let me forget

Now of course I realize that many other people like me had similar childhoods, some worse.  But I'm talking about myself here and why I am the way I am.  

When you're growing up and all you hear is that you're "stupid", "can't do anything", have a big nose ("beak" was his favorite name for me) and a cauliflower ear; one comes to believe that.  

It is interesting to look at my grade school report cards now and see that I did well in all areas except self confidence.  I almost always received a "U" for lack of self confidence.

Not until I left home at 18 years of age and joined the Army did I come to slowly realize that I wasn't quite the "stupid, can't do anything, big nosed misfit with a cauliflower ear."  Oh sure, when I was in Army Basic Training, that wasn't a picnic either.  My name then was "stupid, fucking trainee" but I wasn't the only one.  Everyone was a  "stupid, fucking trainee." This was different, I had company.  

Stonewall Inn - Greenwich Village - 1969

Gradually I began to gain self-confidence when I realized that I wasn't as bad as I was led to believe the first 18 years of my life.  In fact, in some areas I was actually GOOD.  

The "brave" policemen arresting on of those "criminals" a gay guy who was at the Stonewall Bar

Thinking back to those days 53 years ago in January of 1960, I remember my biggest fear was someone making fun of my nose.  Much to my surprise, no one did.  Really, I was very surprised. Hey, maybe I wasn't ugly. 

"How about some respect here cops?"

Of course my big shame in those days was knowing that I was a homosexual (the old timey term back in the pre-Stonewall days for gays).  I definitely felt inferior because of that unalterable fact.  I was ashamed and fearful that anyone would find out.  If they did then no one would respect me.  I would be an outcast, inferior, garbage.

"What is the matter with those fags?"

As time went on during my enlistment in the Army and I was promoted over many of my fellow soldiers, even to assistant platoon sergeant and my own room, and even soldier of the month; I lost most of my inferiority complex that had been drummed into me.

Specialist Ronald W. Tipton

I always envied my peers who grew up in a household where they were valued, complimented and told "we're going to send you to college."  No, I was always told that I wasn't smart enough, good enough and for sure they wouldn't send me to college so I had better prepare myself for another line of work.  That's why I took the commercial course in high school instead of the academic course which all of my friends selected.  

Not only was I good enough for the academic course, because I was a homosexual I wasn't good enough to even associate with my heterosexual "normal" classmates.  A double whammy.  

Now let me stop here and put a qualifier lest anyone think I'm wallowering in self-pity.  Bill also had a rough childhood.  His father died in a drunk driving accident when he was only one year old.  He was raised by a physically abusive step-father.  My Mother's mother died in childbirth when my Mother wasn't quite two years old.  She neglected and physically abused during her childhood.  Many of us didn't get a good start in life but overcame a lot but still never quite get rid of the baggage that has residual effects.

1963 - The year I came out to the world and regained my self-respect

After staying in the closet for the first 21 years of my life I decided to come out when I was caught in bed with a married man (father of three small children) by my Mother.  I had had enough.  Accept me as I am or don't accept me at all.  I've written about that drama in previous blog posts but that was the turning point in my life.  In 1963, six full years before Stonewall, I decided to stop apologizing for who I was and live my life as I am, warts and all.  Either you like me or you don't, that's your choice.  

From that day on I refused to let anybody discount me as a human being whether it was because of my homosexuality or because someone just didn't like me because I refused to be controlled by them.  

I remember where I was when I first heard news of the Stonewall Riot.  I was at the Westbury Bar at 15th and Spruce Streets in Philadelphia, PA.  When all of us fags in the bar heard this story we of course were angry.  At the Westbury Bar we also went through our share of raids, especially around election time when the local politicos wanted to score easy points with the local homophobe voters.  "Hey, let's raid the fag bar.  That's easy pickins!"  Every year like clockwork the police would come in, the lights would flash on and ID's would be checked. Anyone who was under 21 years old was arrested and led out into the waiting paddy wagon outside along with the bartender who served him the drink.  This was all done very matter of fact, like the Nazi Germans leading the Urkrainian Jews to the ditches to be shot.  All expected and very routine.  The only difference was that the underage bar patron and bar tender were usually released the next day after spending the night in "the tank."  No one was shot, as long as you did what you were told.  

How refreshing it was then to learn that some New York queens decided they had enough and threw some bottles at the police when they tried to put them into the paddy wagons.  I know this sounds like an oxymoron, but I've known drag queens who have more balls than a dozen cops put together.  They just had enough that night.  Good for them and good for all the homos like me who also had enough.  You see folks, they had too much self-respect for themselves to put up with any more of this bullshit.  

So in my life I not only had to deal with an upbringing which was not positive but instead beat me down, I also had to deal with society treating me as an inferior.  I had two choices - to cower and accept other's verdict on me or to take control of my own life.  

Me (center bottom row) with friends who respected me - 1962

As I said before, those people who were fortunate enough to grow up in loving and encouraging households, and that includes my gay brothers and sisters - good for you.  But there are many of us who weren't that fortunate, straight and gay.  

So my friends, if I seem a little touchy (and I am) about the way I am treated by friends, relatives and co-workers, this is where I am coming from.  I wish I could get rid of the childhood baggage completely but I have never been able to accomplish that.  I wish that I could breeze through life, supremely confident in my appearance and abilities but I cannot because I always have that little seed of doubt.  

As I said before, many others have had my experience growing up, many worse.  Different people take different paths to deal with their "baggage."  Some resort to drugs or alcohol.  I don't. Some resort to striking out at others to compensate. No folks, I go through life, even with all my faults (and I have plenty I know), with a happy attitude which is my nature.  But once I am done wrong or treated badly, that person doesn't get a second chance.  Whether it be a public figure or an individual person.  I may forgive the bad behavior but I don't forget.  That is not in my nature.  

Me today with friend (straight) who respects me even though he knows I'm gay

I was brought down the first 18 years of my life and have been on too many occasions since but at this time of my life I have zero tolerance to accept that behavior from anyone.  

"Lady Marmalade" Venture Inn, Philadelphia, PA 1980

Just like those drag queens at Stonewall forty-four years ago who had enough and weren't going to step into that police paddy wagon just because they were gay, I don't accept being discounted.  I had enough.  I don't accept being taken for granted.  I had enough.  

I am a unique individual just like every one of you who is reading this blog.  Some of you may like me and some of you do not like me.  Those of you who like me, let's be friends.  Those who don't, then go away and don't bother trying to change me.  I am what I am and at this time of my life there is not much more fine tuning to be done.  What you see (and hear and read) is pretty much what you get with me.  If I criticize one of your favorite celebs like Beyonce who lip-synchs songs (and thus is lying to her fans), get over it.  It's my opinion.  If I write about myself in my blog (duh) and you think I write too much about myself...well this is my blog.  It's about me.  Deal with it.  If I bore you, go away.  If I interest you, stick around because I think I lead a pretty interesting life.  

So there is my spiel this morning folks from this damaged, imperfect, human being called "Ron."  I like myself and I hope you do too.

Gay Marriage USA Update

Ike (my brother), me and Bill - September 27, 2012 - our Christmas card photo this year 

As of a few minutes ago, our posting on "Gay Marriage USA" has 42,670 Likes, 2,338 Comments, and 6,218 Shares.  The webmaster of "Gay Marriage USA" sent me a message this morning saying our photo was the second most popular photo ever posted to their website.  

A "Sergio" informed me this morning that our photo has now been published to "Occupy Borders" and that we are becoming "quite famous."  Hey, finally my Fifteen Minutes of Fame!

I am working on reading all the 2,338 comments.  About 30% of them are negative from the Usual Suspects, the Religious Right and the hateful homophobes.  I don't respond to them but I am attempting to respond to all the positive, supportive comments.  

Never in my lifetime did I dream that the relationship I have with Bill would be "accepted" so positively.  Of course I always knew it was right and had always assumed that we would go to our graves living in the shadows of legitimacy.  Now that there is an actual real possibility that we can be married for real, it is almost too much for me to comprehend.  

Even if marriage equality doesn't happen during our lifetime it will happen for those who follow us.  I am glad that Bill and I were able to do our part in furthering this fundamental human freedom of the pursuit of happiness with the one we love.  

It's all good folks, all good.

Going Viral

Ron and Bill - 1978

Yesterday my posting of the "then (1964)" and "now (2011)" picture of me and Bill on the "Gay Marriage USA" Facebook page went viral, much to my surprise.  This after an innocuous e-mail from my cousin Tim Tipton suggesting that I post a photo of me and Bill to  the Gay Marriage USA Facebook page.

A few minutes ago I see where that posting had 40,868 Likes, 2,198 Comments and 5,864 Shares.  Wow.  My Fifteen minutes of fame has finally arrived at the grand age of seventy-one years.  Who knew?

So, my goal is to read all of the comments and acknowledge the positive comments.  Of course there are more than a few negative comments of which I will not acknowledge or even engage in conversation, learning long ago that when a person is that insecure in their own person and fearful of two men (or women) loving each other, it is a waste of my time to try and convince them otherwise.  And I definitely don't feel as if I have to defend myself.  What is there to defend?  Finding the one true love of my life and living a life that all too few people live, a life of true happiness?  Yes folks, I know what I have and what they don't have and will probably never have, happiness.  

Reading the comments I came across several from the Reverend Fred Phelps.  You know him don't you folks?  He's the one who gets his congregation to show up at military funerals and blame the death of those soldiers on gay people, who he calls "Fags."  Yes folks, I have arrived.  I have stirred the ire of the Hate Monger in Chief, Fred Phelps.  To tell you the truth, all I can do is smile.  

Rev. Phleps preaching the gospel

"Have You Ever Had a Gay Experience?"

A fun video to watch after last night's disastrous (for me) presidential debate.  God knows I need to laugh about something after watching that road kill.

Israeli Army Celebrates Gay Pride Month

This is how the Israeli Army celebrates Gay Pride Month.  They posted this picture of two gay Israeli Army soldiers holding hands (in public yet!) on their Facebook page.  I say "Bravo!"

Of course even in Israel this posting triggered (no pun intended) some negative feedback from some of the more conservative Israeli's.  You know, some of the old folks will never change.  I can imagine what John McCain will have to say when he sees this picture.

"EEWWWW!"

For myself, I think this is a wonderful picture and shows the world how far we have come as a human race that we, or at least some of us, can recognize that love between two people whether they be of opposite sex or same sex is still love.

Of course you know who this picture really pisses off don't you?  The Iranians and the rest of the Muslim world.  Mock Mood Dinner Jacket must be having a bird now.

WTF?

The Boys in the Band - Harold Arrives

Back in gay prehistoric times (before most of my blog followers were born) there was a seminal (no pun intended) movie about gay men.  It was called "Boys in the Band."  I remember clearly when and where Bill and I saw it.  It was at the Goldman theater on Chestnut Street in center city Philadelphia, right across from the bank (Girard Bank) where I worked.

We had heard about this first ever gay (called "homosexual") movie in the bars.  We couldn't believe there was actually a movie about real gay men and how we actually lived.  Just couldn't believe it.  Oh I know it is hard for a lot of you "youngsters" to believe that we of an earlier gay generation were so excited by this first ever main stream movie about gay men.

Bill and I were so nervous about seeing this movie, that we saw it in the day time.  We sat near the exit doors in case their was a riot disturbance in the theater's audience during the showing.  After all, gays back in pre Stonewall Days were only heard about and not seen in decent company.  We were allowed to congregate at our gay bars, with the knowledge that during election season our bars would be raided.  It was just a fact of life.

So it was with some trepidation that Bill and I went to see this HOMOSEXUAL movie.  Note, there isn't one female character in it (excluding "Cliff").  You get the feeling from the movie that it was just a film of the original off Broadway play, which it was.  However, it still works.

Me, my friend Ron and Phil back In The Day - 1965
Our very own Boys In The Band
Both Ron and Phil are gone now - I survived

The movie's language and clothing is somewhat dated (tight pants on the ass for the guys and the "Mary's" and "she's" when referring to gay friends) but otherwise the premise holds up true.  Sure, it's about gay self hatred and bitchiness but the Slice of Life, Gay Life, still comes through strong and true.

Harold's entrance has to be one of the best entrances in movies since Liz Taylor's Cleopatra's entrance into Rome.  No one has ever topped Harold.

The sad news from this movie is that all of the actors have since died from AIDS.  Everyone except the one straight actor, Laurence Luckinbill who in real life is also straight and married to Lucie Arnaz, the daughter of "I Love Lucy" Lucille Ball.

This is one movie I can watch again an again.  I have lived it.

Bravo boys!

Prince Charming

Prince Charming - Disney Version

I saw him again this morning.  "Him" was Prince Charming.  As my fellow gay bloggers know all to well, we're always on the lookout for the elusive Prince.  We haunt the gay bars hoping against hope that we will see HIM leaning against the far wall locking eyes with us as soon as we walk into the bar.  We go to gay churches hoping to meet HIM at the coffee get together at the end of the services.  We hang out at the gay section of the beach hoping that he will see how adorable we are in spite of our less than perfect beach bodies.  Oh yes, WE all know what I'm talking about.

Well, this morning I went for my haircut at Dino's Barber Shop located in the back of the Essentials Beauty Store at the Safeway Shopping Center in Rehoboth Beach.  I was hardly settled into the barber chair when HE walked in.  Yes, it was Prince Charming again!

I've seen HIM many times over the years.  In fact, twice I even hooked up with the Prince.  Both affairs were intense but short.  Neither one ended well.  But while they lasted, they were heaven.  HEAVEN! Memories that I will never, never forget.  I often go back and relive those memories.

Yes, this morning HE showed himself again.  This Prince was in his late 40's or early 50's.  About 5'9" or 10" tall.  Light brown crew cut (I am a sucker - no pun intended - for older guys with a crew cut) hair.

He was dressed in a casual shirt which he was wearing out over his tan shorts.  He had white socks and was wearing a new pair of sneakers.  He was adorable!

As soon as he came in he averted his eyes from mine.  I'm sorry folks, when I see Prince Charming my hungry eyes must give me away like a fool.  I probably scare them all off.  Well, he did avert eye contact and immediately sat down and picked up a newspaper and started to read it.

While Dino was cutting my hair and talking to me (don't ask me what he was talking about, my mind was racing ahead to these would do together during the next ten years; the trips, the parties, and the...oh yes, the bed), I was sneaking furtive glances at HIM.  Oh such nice legs, hairy but not TOO hairy.  Nice hair (crewcut.)  I like the shape of his mouth.  Oh yes, very, very nice.

You know it's funny but I'm not usually attracted to gay men.  Sometimes I think I'm doomed to only find straight men attractive.  I think it is their natural masculinity,  innocence and lack of bitchiness that attract me.  I have gay friends but (no offense if you're reading this my gay friends)  I find none of them attractive.  We're loaded with gay guys down here in the East Coast Gay Playground of Washington, D.C. but I find NONE of them attractive.  Not even the butchies who do the ManDance thing at the local leather bar.

Nope, they are all a bunch of limp weenies to me.  The irony is that the straight men I am attracted to would be limp with me.  I'm in a Catch-22.  

Some years ago I became resigned to the fact that I would never, ever have a fling or romantic interest in anyone again.  Oh I know, you ask "What about your spouse?"  Hey, I love my spouse and he loves me but THAT part of our relationship ended decades ago.  Not that I'm champing at the bit to hop into bed with someone, I'm not.  But, every now and than I see someone like this guy this morning that gets the old juices flowing again.

Hey, maybe there is still some life in the old bird yet.

Here are a couple of my fantasies in the entertainment world today.  For either one of these men, I would literally run away from home.  Yes I would.

Bradley Cooper - be still my heart.

I know Ryan is stuck on himself but he is still my No. 1 (Bradley is a close second) fantasy.

If I did a Threesome with these two, I would implode.

Sometimes Common Sense Prevails

New York State Senator Roy McDonald

Late yesterday the New York State senate approved a bill legalizing same sex marriage.  The bill was one vote short for several days prior to passage last night in the Republican controlled senate.  Republican State Senator Roy McDonald was on the fence as to how to vote for several days.  Finally he made his decision and voted for the bill, thus enabling the passage of the bill plus a few more less courageous Republican senators to hop on the bandwagon of the Inevitable, which is legalizing same sex marriage in this county. 


Look folks, it's going to happen EVENTUALLY.  To those who oppose it, you're going to go down in history looking like George Wallace standing in the school house door preventing blacks from going to an all white school.  


Thus it was refreshing to hear what New York State senator Roy McDonald said after his vote yesterday to the assembled press:

 "You get to the point where you evolve in your life where everything isn't black and white, good and bad, and you try to do the right thing. You might not like that. You might be very cynical about that. Well, fuck it. I don't care what you think. I'm trying to do the right thing. I'm tired of Republican-Democrat politics. They can take the job and shove it. I come from a blue-collar background. I'm trying to do the right thing, and that's where I'm going with this."

Republican News York State Senator Roy McDonald

 Now I'm going to say something I never thought I would say again in my life:

I LIKE THIS REPUBLICAN! 

This is Gay Pride?

Men dresssed and made up as women to celebrate Gay Pride Month of June

June is now universally known as gay pride month.  June is the date because that is the anniversary of the Stonewall riots of 1969 when the gay patrons of the Stonewall Inn in New York City rebelled against the time honored tradition of the police busting them just for assembling in a bar.  Most of the gays who rebelled were drag queens.

Now I'm the first to admit that some of the bravest "men" I've meet and seen over the years have been drag queens.  I especially remember one event that occurred at the Westbury Bar in Philadelphia in 1969 that involved a black man named "Sara Vaughan" and my obnoxious butch gay friend (not really, more of an acquaintance) Joe M.  Joe was casually insulting Sara for being a 'drag fag' (Joe was gay himself by the way) while they were both in the waiting line to go to the Ladies Room at the Westbury.  Sara finally had enough and 'she' turned around and gave butch Joe a punch right in his face.  Joe, in shock and disbelief, swung back and the next thing everyone knew, both were on the dirty, drink-spilled floor of the bar, trying to land punches on one another.  During the melee, Sara lost her wig.  The bouncer finally separated the two gay men (one a black drag queen and the other a plaid shirted, dungaree wearing cowboy) Sara screamed "Where's my wig?!  Where's my wig?!"  Somebody scooped it up off of the mucky floor and handed it to her.  It looked like week old roadkill that had been through several rains.

Needless to say, I had a new found respect for drag queens.  Now having said that, now I'm going to get something off of my chest that has been bothering me for a long time.

Every June there are gay pride parades through out the world.  These parades are covered by the media.  There are many participants in these gay pride parades.  SOME of the participants are drag queens much like the two pictured at the beginning of this post.  MORE are just regular gay folk like myself.  So who does the media cover when reporting on the gay pride parades?  Drag queens.  That bothers me because it presents a picture of all gays as drag queens.  I have no desire, no have I ever had a desire to be a drag queen.  I have always enjoyed being a male.  In fact I am so thankful that I was born a male, not that there is anything wrong with being a female (some of my best friends are after all), it's just that I prefer being a male.  In fact I like males so much, that I've lived with one for the past 46 years (soon to be 47 this July).

So every year when the gay pride parades hit the news, let's lay off the drag queens.  Hey, I like them and have been entertained by them many times over the years.  And at one time one of my good friend was a drag queens ("she" died some years ago).

I now live in the Rehoboth Beach area of coastal Delaware.  Rehoboth Beach and the surrounding areas of Lewes, and Milton are very gay friendly and becoming more so as the years go by.  Many straights also visit this beach resort area.  What the straights see mostly of the gays are the very visible drag queens who put on shows for the straights.  I believe everyone has the right to earn a living but to me gay men performing as drag queens (and STILL impersonating Liza, Barbra and Judy - when is THAT GOING TO STOP?) is like black men performing minstrel shows for the whites. This might be considered a harsh judgement by some but hey folks, that's just the way I see it.

Now that I've gotten that off of my chest I want to say that I am proud to be a gay man and very impressed with the progress that has been made towards 'acceptance' (I hate that term but can think of no other) of gay men and women in the year 2011.  Never in my wildest dreams when I was the Only Gay Man in the World in 1960 did I think this country would have ever come this far.  But now that we have, can we please drop the gay stereotype of the drag queen?