Memorial Day Weekend 2026

 

Today is Memorial Day weekend here in the summer beach capital Rehoboth Beach and environs. 

Unfortunately it is also chilly and rainy. That the forecast for this weekend and next week.

The following week Pat arrives from his cozy little home in Hamilton Canada for a two week visit with The Old Man here. I have a number of doctor's appointments which he will take me. I plan to introduce Pat to my doctor's as my eventual caregiver much the same way I did before I became Bill's full-time caregiver. Yes folks, that's the road I'm going down. Time to face reality.

By the way, I'm not sad at all that the weather is dreary and uninviting for the summertime beachgoers. Especially those "kids" from the University of Delaware who have recently targeted the Rehoboth Beach boardwalk for "events." Yes, it is what you think it is. A bunch of unruly "kids" trying to instigate riot or some such thing so they can loot the stores. Hey "kids" I have a tip for you, the stores in Rehobth Beach only have the Chinese made overpriced tourist souvenirs. No high end stores down here "kids." You better stick to Walnut Street in downtown Philadelphia for your riot produced "shopping" expeditions. See HERE:

Route One Traffic 8 15 2025

Just got back from another Stuck In Traffic Rehoboth Beach Summertime Fun Times!

What was I thinking? I get a notice from TD Bank this morning that unless I posted a transaction in my account within the next thirty days they are going to make it inactive. Then after a period of inactivity (I didn't check to see how long) they would escheat the balance of my account to the state of Delaware. Hey! I don't have that much money ($2,695) in that account but I sure as hell don't want to give it to the state of Delaware or another other entity. I've already had that happen once years ago when I had a convenience account at a bank in Provincetown, Mass. I think I only had about three hundred dollars in that account (actually a substantial sum, this was in the Seventies) but it disappeared into the ether (state of Massachusetts) because when I made my annual summertime trip to Provincetown I found out they had close my account. Money gone!

So when I get these notices from the banks (by the way, the Provincetown Bank never sent me a notice or if they did, it got lost in the shuffle of my life back then, I was much more active then than I am now), I pay attention! I write out a check for $100 and drive down to the bank to make a deposit to keep my account alive for another six months. Why don't I close the account you ask? Because I have a TD bank account in Canada and they are connected. I never know when I'll have to use my Canadian TD Bank account again. I used to use it when I visited Pat in Canada but I can't do that now because of the Orange Jesus. I'm afraid if I visit Pat in Canada I won't be able to come back to the U.S. Why? Because the border guards sometimes check one's iPhone, including Hidden Files, before they let you across the border. I have a lot of anti-Convicted Felon images on my iPhone photos. Yes Virginia, this is the era we are living in now where freedom of speech and expression can get you into trouble. I never thought I would live to see this day but here we are. May I live long enough to see this evil go away but for right now I have to face reality. No visits to Pat in Canada during this Reign of Intimidation, Threats and Corruption. 

So I want to keep my TD American account active. I write out a check for one hundred dollars. Hop in my car and head down Route One........ON A SUMMERTIME FRIDAY AFTERNOON! What was I thinking?

About forty-five minutes later I arrive at the Rehoboth TD bank branch, a trip that normally takes about seven to ten minutes. Yes Virginia, I sat in my 2010 Red Subaru Forester in this hot summer heat inching along Route One until I got to the TD Bank branch office. 

I made my $100 deposit and vowed to myself never again to take my Subaru or any other vehicle down Route One on a summertime day for any reason. 

NEVER! 

Aldi's Does It Right!

Rehoboth Beach boardwalk earlier today. This is why I stay away during the summer season. These people all drive down to Rehoboth and they are in a hurry. 

 Late yesterday afternoon, I braved the Route One summer crowds and drove down to Aldi's, four miles outside of Rehoboth Beach.

I hate, hate, hate driving down Route One especially in the summertime really ESPECIALLY during the height of summertime season at Rehoboth Beach. I live near a beach resort folks, on the east side of Route One which is the main throughway from Maine to Florida, otherwise famously known as Coastal Highway. 

Each year Route One becomes more congested and dangerous, and this year it is the worse yet. I can barely get through a day without hearing the wail of police or ambulance sirens responding to the latest accident from speeding visitors. During the summer tourist season I stay away from Rehoboth Beach even though it is only ten miles as the crow flies. I do go to the Rehoboth Beach one mile boardwalk which is a wonderful boardwalk as boardwalks go, but only in the fall, winter and spring. If I have visitors, like last year when Pat and Glenn visited me, I'll have them drive me down (I won't drive) but even then, I became exhausted and passed out and spent three days in the hospital last June for evaluation. 

Yesterday was no exception with the craziness but I was determined to go to Aldi's because that's where my neighbor bought that out of this world cole slaw. I had to have some yesterday. Had to have it! Yes, I am an impulsive person. Guilty!

So at about 5:30 PM I head out of my very quiet

and peaceful development and enter The Highway Of Death, otherwise know variously as Route One or the Coastal Highway.  The video above I took from the lane out of my house towards Route One. All that traffic is headed south on Route One and they are always in a hurry.

Route One south towards Rehoboth Beach on a rare light traffic day. I must have taken this picture early in the morning (6 AM) when I used to go to Rehoboth to walk on the boardwalk before the traffic picked up by 8 AM. During the summer tourist season, especially on the weekends, you can't even see the road because of all the vehicles which is often bumper to bumper. Sometimes the traffic is backed up all the way to my house, ten miles north. This usually happens during accidents, which are not infrequent in season.

Not too bad going down. Traffic heavy and slow moving of course, but I was very careful. Of course I encountered a couple of idiots who are in a hurry, weaving in and out the five lanes of traffic. Yes, five lanes. When Bill and I first moved to Delaware there were three lanes and a beautiful, grassy medial strip. However, over the years and addition lane was added, then another. No more grassy medial strip. Just all traffic now including a dedicated lane for shuttle buses to the beach, which was a great idea that should have been adopted years ago. There is just so much parking space in Rehoboth Beach, that doesn't expand. There is even metered parking in the formerly quiet Rehoboth Beach neighborhoods now. Guess what the main source of Rehoboth Beach's revenue is? Parking fees and fines. They make millions each year. Millions!

Route One is jam packed with shopping venues and entertainment. When in Rehoboth Beach, if you want something else besides overpriced boardwalk cheap souvenir junk made in China, you're advised "Go out on the Highway for that!" Cracker Barrell, Chick-fil-A, and other chain restaurants, Walmart, local eateries, grocery stores (no Wegman's yet, those grocery stores need Wegmans competition), and many other sundry establishments to part the tourists from their money....fast.  Inner Rehoboth itself specializes in the really expensive local restaurants (high rents, not because the food is anything special). Location, location, location!

Arriving at the shopping center

where Aldi's is located I see there is a light. Thank goodness, I don't have to make one of those dreaded U-turns to get into that shopping center. By the way, did I mention that Delaware is a sales tax free state? That's another reason for all the shopping on both sides of Route One as you approach Rehoboth Beach. Many, many outlet stores of every persuasion you can imagine. NO SALES TAX, which is another reason Delaware thrives in addition to all those retirees like me who have moved down here to escape the outrageous personal property and school taxes of neighboring states like Pennsylvania, New Jersey and New York. 

Aldi's is located in the shopping center that formerly held K-Mart. K-Mart died years ago from short-sighted management by Sears and even Martha Stewart couldn't save them. The former K-Mart store is massive. 

I park my car in the parking meter free parking lot and get out to enter the store. I notice that the Aldi shopping carts have that little small chain with a slot to enter a quarter to unlock the chain. Smart move! This is to prevent those lazy people who take a store shopping cart and after loading their shopping booty in their cart, they let their shopping cart drift away in the parking lot. You would be surprise at how cheap most people are, they want their quarter back so they will return their cart to the place where they can push in the chain and their quarter pops back. Of course not everyone does that, I did see one lonely looking orphan Aldi shopping cart by itself in the parking lot, look for some shopper to claim their free quarter that they will reward them with when they return that cart to where the quarter will pop out.

As I entered the store I noticed a different demographic of shopper in Aldi's. These were Beach People. You know, skimpily dressed, smelling of sun tan lotion, wearing flip flops with usually several Mexican Jumping Jack kids jumping up and down and running through the wide aisles. Yes wide aisles! Aldi's is one of those rare grocery stores that doesn't clog up it's aisles with more grocery product to get your attention. Also, I didn't see anyone stocking shelves which is a new annoyance at all the other grocery stores. I guess they don't pay their employees to stock their shelves overnight when the store is closed. Did I mentioned wide aisles? 

As I soaked up the pleasure of walking down those wide aisles I noticed that the prices in Aldi's was LOW. OMG! I'm talking low! Hummus, which I would pay $4.99 for at a chain supermarket was $2.69 at Aldi's. And they had a selection. Imagine that?

I surmised that they could offer low prices because the ambiance (if I could use such an elegant term to describe a supermarket/grocery store) was decidedly BASIC. Fine with me, I'm only after the product I was looking for. I don't need fancy accruements.  Pat, where he lives in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada, shops at a store like this. He often tells me of the bargains he encounters and takes advantage of. I think one of the stores he shops is called "Food Basics." That's all we need folks, the basics. 

I found my cole slaw but while I was in the store, and wanted to minimize any future trips this summer down Route One, I took a look-see around the rest of the store to see what I could abscond with. Wait, I think "abscond" means steal. I took a look to see if there was anything else I could sample and I found it, several different varieties of hummus which isn't available at my regular store. They only have regular hummus and red pepper hummus.

Now my hands/arms were full as I was wobbling my way to the check out counter. Self checkout, of course. Saving more money to offer lower prices.

I scan my new found treasures, pay for them with my credit card and, carefully balancing my five items, head for my car, which I couldn't find initially. Aldi's has a large parking lot. Eventually after wandering around for a few minutes looking for my car, ignoring the few pitiful looks I was getting from fellow shoppers (old man wandering around the parking lot looking for his car who couldn't even afford a quarter for a shopping cart), I found my car.

I loaded everything up in my car including myself and headed out to the lane to the light, which again I was thankful I "had the light" to get out. While waiting for the light to change and the never ending stream of traffic headed north on Route One to God knows where, I see a break in traffic. I make my right turn on red only to hear a horn BLARING AT ME. Whoops! Someone is in a hurry! As that car passed me (of course they had to pass me because they obviously didn't have brakes on their car to slow down as I merged into traffic), the woman passenger, her face twisted in anger, was saying something to me as she waived her finger at me (no middle finger thank goodness, that's a fighting challenge). Ah ha, my day is complete. Now I have again become a recipient of road rage. By the way folks, I had plenty of time and besides I had a whole line of cars behind me waiting to merge on Route One. The one right behind me was ready to blast his horn at me when he saw the same break in traffic going north on Route One that I saw. 

I ignored the "lady" as I always do when I'm the recipient of one of these childish and unnecessary road rage incidents. Do you have any idea at how many times I've been cutoff while driving in traffic. I've lost count. Most times I just chalk it up to unreasonable, in a hurry, motorists. Almost always when I'm driving down Route One in heavy traffic, some is cutting me of as they weave in and out of traffic. Years ago they used to have a sign on the right side of the road as you enter Rehoboth Beach that said: "Slow down and relax, you're at the beach now." I wonder what happened to that sign, I haven't seen it in years. Probably taken down because some Important was insulted. Yes, we do have a lot of Important people down here Lower Slower.

I made it home safe and sound. Yes, a little rattled because of that impatient motorist but that's to be expected when entering Route One during the height of the summer tourist season.

"Going to the beach!"

Just another little adventure to share with you my ever faithful blog followers. 

Rehoboth Mall Early Morning Shopping 7-20-2-25 And Other Ramblings

Embolden by my early morning success of the past two days of venturing out early in the morning to beat the summertime traffic, I got up early to make a Walmart shopping run.

Normally in the summertime, I wouldn't go near the Walmart in the Rehoboth Mall because of the heavy traffic and crazy drivers. Almost every weekend there is an accident, sometimes fatal. And remember last year when I collapsed in the Walmart parking lot and had to spend three days in the hospital for a series of tests? That was when my best pals Glen (from California) and Pat (from Canada) were here in Lower Slower for a visit to Casa Tipton-Kelly where I played the Gracious Host. Thank God there were here because they had to look after Casa Tipton-Kelly while I was held captive at Beebe Hospital for tests. 

I wasn't sure if Walmart was opened early but apparently someone in marketing got wise and YES, Walmart opens at 6 AM! I'm old enough to remember that, especially on Sundays stores like Walmart didn't open until 11 AM. I remember going to the Dover Mall and standing outside with a crowd of people waiting for J C Penney to open it's doors at 10 AM on weekdays and 11 on Sunday. Hey folks, do you want to sell your merchandise or not? Finally, some of these businesses are getting "it." I can see why Lowe's early (for the contractors) but Walmart.

My empty Walmart shopping cart needs to be filled!

Well, when I hobbled in the store, there were plenty of summertime visitors to the beach shopping. Among the shoppers were a rather large Hispanic family shopping. When I see Hispanics shopping now I'm on the lookout for Trump's Gestapo Ice agents out profiling little brown people to arrest. So far none of that police state activity here in Lower Slower thank God. Not that we don't have a large Hispanic population, Mexicans and also many Guatemalans. In fact, at the Georgetown Walmart there are so many Hispanic shoppers one would think  you were shopping in Mexico City. I feel so bad for my Hispanic neighbors, having to live in fear every time they go out shopping now because of Trump's Secret Police Ice Agents who could possible whisk them off to a foreign gulag. What kind of world are we living in folks? But I digress, this is a subject for another blog.

At Walmart I stocked up on Walmart's Bran cereal which contains 100% vitamins on almost everything and at only $2.38 a box, it a real bargain. I was also able to find a Gnome to complete my little flower garden around my now naked transformer on the border of my property. Remember a few weeks when Comcast's Goon Squad came by and ripped out Bill's fence and my clematis plants? That ugly scar was really bothering me every time I looked at it and also damaging my reputation as the Flower Man of the neighborhood. I just couldn't let that now fertile soil go barren like a Mars landscape. I've planted annuals there, which of course are having trouble rooting in our current heat wave, to soften that now naked spot. And besides, that dirt around the transformer has been carefully cultivated over the past twenty years. I'm not about to give it up to.........grass and even worse, crab grass which is now trying to make inroads. So aggressive that crab/wire/Bermuda grass. As long as I'm alive and living here I will not let that happen.

Walmart parking lot early this morning - I wasn't the only early bird

After I did my Walmart shopping I exited the Walmart parking lot, which in the past was hard to do because of all the traffic, but this morning easy. 

Casa Tipton-Kelly is only four miles north from Walmart. With light traffic, like this morning, I can make that run in twelve minutes. On regular summertime peak tourist days, that run could take thirty minutes or more of white knuckle driving (grasping that steering wheel hard and swivel head which I find difficult to do now because of my arthritis, yes my arthritis is especially bad in my neck. I can't swivel my head like I used to and when I do it HURTS.) 

After dropping off my Walmart shopping items at Casa Tipton-Kelly I headed out north on Route One (Walmart is south) to my food store Food Lion. After picking some more of that wonderful marinade I discovered last week (more about that in a future blog post, boy do I have content to posts in future blog posts now that I've been rebooted) I drove over to my favorite plant nursery. I had to buy some green "tomato" string to tie up a few cherry tomato plants that have seeded themselves and grown  up near my garage. I love those cherry tomatoes in my pasta salad, a real Summertime Treat for me. A few weeks ago I post an ad in my NextDoor app for free tomato plants. Several very nice people came over and took advantage and left with my free tomato seedlings. But I had a few of those seedlings left and I just don't have the heart to pull them up and put them in my compost pile. I try to be "plant brutal" but I always have a problem being heartless to innocent plants who are just trying to have their own life. 

I  got home just in time for my weekly Zoom call with Stuart (my former school mate) and Pat. That takes place every Sunday. We three old geezers, one from Boca Raton Florida (Stuart) and Pat (from Hamilton, Ontario, Canada) never have a problem taking. And we don't always talk about our health like you would expect Old Geezers to talk about. And we always record our Zoom calls (actually just me and Stuart, not Pat) for posterity. We sometimes talk about someone two hundred years from now looking at these videos and saying in pity "Look at those poor bastards and how primitive they were."

Hey, maybe that will be one of us in our future life. Yes, we talk (me and Stuart actually before Pat comes on the Zoom call later because Pat still goes to church) about our past and future lives because folks, we all have lived and will live future lives. Believe it! Speaking of which, another long time friend and former classmate just sent me another "Jesus" booklet. He hasn't given up on trying to "save" me no matter how much I insult him when he does things like that. The sheer hubris of him to try and push his fairy tales on me. But again I digress. Subject for a future blog.

Anyway, when I got home I was exhausted. Maybe it's the heat but I also think my age continues to catch up with me. I don't want to pass out in any more Walmart parking lots. Especially now because I don't have any backup like Glenn and Pat to watch my house while I'm in the hospital cheating death.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a fish pond filter I have to clean.

Have a great day everyone!

Company Has Gone!

Glenn and Pat with me in my hospital bed Sunday June 16 2024

 My company left this morning around nine thirty AM. 

Pat and Glenn were here for ten days but what a ten days we had!

I am just briefly writing about their visit now because I am still recovering. Not only from their fabulous ten dat visit to Casa Tipton-Kelly and Rehoboth Beach, Delaware but also their visit to me in the hospital where I had a two night three day stay. Yes folks, I ended up in the hospital for three days!

What happened? You'll never believe it but when we were exiting the Rehoboth Beach Walmart after purchasing a game of Clue, and while I was walking like an old man behind Pat and Glenn who were heavily involved in a discussion about a row of two rubber decks on the dashboard of a Jeep in the parking lot, I crumple up like a piece of paper and passed out backwards on the heat infused black macadam parking lot. Pat and Glenn didn't even know I was on my back, totally passed out until a car beeped its horn to get their attention that their friend (me) was unconscious on his back in the parking lot, blocking cars trying to make an exit out of the parking lot. 

Pat told me he rushed to my body to get me up along with Glenn. I don't even remember passing out, only slowly coming to by Pat asking me "Are you all right Ron" over and over again. 

I remember nothing about passing out except thinking about the rubber duckie Jeep story then an image of steel doors with vertical teeth coming together and be trying to get through those doors before they closed. Yes, what did THAT image come from?

As Pat and Glenn helped me up I felt the back of my head and it was sticky with my blood. And my head hurt. Later I found out I had a brush burn on my left elbow and low left back. 

I was woozy. I felt like I was drunk. Just the day before I had my colonoscopy (which came out fine, only two small polyps). The sun was hot. We were up late the previous night. I wasn't getting my daily naps.

Pat and Glenn kept asking me is I was all right. I was going to go home but then I thought of the incident with Liam Neeson's wife Natasha Richardson when she fell backwards after a skiing accident (Death. On 16 March 2009, Richardson sustained a head injury when she fell while taking a beginner skiing lesson at the Mont Tremblant Resort, about 130 kilometres (81 mi) from Montreal. At first, Richardson refused any medical help but complained of a severe headache about two hours after the accident.) and thought she was all right but ended up dying about twenty-four hours later because she had a brain hemorrhage  that was slowly bleeding in her skull and she was unaware that it was bleeding. I decided to go to the nearest walk-in clinic.

At the walk-in clinic they checked my bloody head and decided to send me to the Emergency Room. There I went and spent the next two nights and three days going through a series of tests including a brain Cat-scan, stress test both on the treadmill and nuclear. Echo gram and some other tests which I can't remember now. I pretty much ran the gamut of tests. The blood on the back of my head was superficial. It still hurts but it doesn't look like I caused any serious internal injuries in my brain with my collapse in the Walmart parking. Oh the embarrassment, collapsing in the Walmart parking lot? Well, I guess it could have been IN Walmart itself of even at The Nook where we had breakfast earlier. 

They found nothing but I am wearing an heart monitor for the next ten days and I have had my driving privileges suspended indefinitely. I see my cardiologist next week for further evaluation and hopefully have my driving privileges returned. I HOPE!

I was so thankful to get out of the hospital yesterday even though they treated me very well. I don't like hospitals. I've spent too much time in them in my lifetime. 

I'm taking it easy now. Pat Glenn and I did play "Clue" (first time for me, I loved it and actually won my first game!) We went out to dinner last night at the Tequila Real in Milton. A lovely summer evening. 

Pat and Glenn left this morning. In spite of all my drama in collapsing after trying to act like the 27 year old I think I am in my mind but in actually I'm an 82 year old man trying to cram too much in a short period of time on a hot and humid summer day one day after a body cleansing colonoscopy. 

More.....much more in future blog posts about Pat and Glenn's visit. They were wonderful and in spite of the brief stint in the hospital by yours truly we all had a wonderful time. Actually, we had a FABULOUS time!

Night Out in Rehoboth Beach May 24, 2015

Recently a posted a video of one of our (me and Pat's) night out in Palm Springs. 

There is a night life (such as it is) right here at home in Rehoboth Beach Delaware. This is a compilation of some pictures and videos that I took about eight years ago during one of Pat's visits to me here at my home near Rehoboth Beach. 

Pat is planning on coming down later this summer for a week's visit. He was here last year for a visit. 

Since I began caregiving for Bill two and a half years ago, and COVID restrictions, I haven't been anywhere but here at home in Delaware. I am so looking forward to Pat's visit this year so we can make more memories.

When I see these photo/video compilations I think of all those trips I used to take alone. The few times I went with friends of paid someone to go with me, those trips all turned out to be only trolling for sex for the friends who went with me and even the two guys who I paid to go along with me. 

I used to envy to gay guys who went on trips with friends. They all seemed to have such a good time. What was the matter with me? Was my personality that bad? Was I that unattractive? 

During high school gym classes I was usually picked last for the teams. Was that an extension of my loser status? 

No, that wasn't the problem. The problem was that those friends who went with me and even those two guys I paid for were selfish sex addicts. How refreshing to have a friend, albeit late in life, like Pat. A truly nice guy (cute too!) who was and still is and interested in me for myself. How refreshing!

At this time of my life when my time when I'm a caregiver, the quarterly trips are out. Hopefully, sometime in the future Pat and I can resume our quarterly trips to California, Philadelphia, and Canada. But for now, his upcoming visit to Rehoboth Beach (maybe next month) is much anticipated.

P. S.

Surprised that even here in our little Rehoboth Beach gay bar we even have a boy toy go go dancer?

Bill Goes For a Walk on the Boardwalk

 

Monday was a very mild day here in southern Delaware. Sun wasn't out but the temperatures were so mild, I could feel the boardwalk in Rehoboth Beach calling to me.

I love walking on the boardwalk. The boards of the boardwalk are springy. Makes my legs feel good. And these days my legs need all the feel good they can get.

Bill also came down with me as he always days when I go out. I am so glad he is here at home and I can take him out (almost) every day. If he was in some facility (God forbid) he would be stuck inside all day, at the mercy of all those underpaid attendants ("attendants" for lack of a better description). 

Usually Bill sits in the car while I take my Boardwalk walk. However, he's been working on healing the open wound on his right leg. He's been walking a lot recently. I so admire him, he just doesn't give up. He's weak and tires easily but he pushes himself. I tell him not to overdue it, which he doesn't but he does get his exercise in. Sometimes he does more walking than I do. One thing, he can take the thirteen steps up from his basement bedroom to our first floor easier than I do. You should see me struggle to do those steps. Maybe on second though you don't want to see that sad sight.

Although this video shows a sparsely occupied boardwalk, there were actually a lot of people in town Rehoboth. Then I realized that Monday was a holiday, Presidents' Day. Yes, another holiday. Seems like every time we turn around, there's another holiday. It was nice to see all those folks in Rehoboth, eager for the new summer season to begin.  Rehoboth is very smart, they don't charge for parking in the offseason. Smart move.  

Today the temperatures reached 71 degrees. I'll take it! I'm done with snow. This time of year I would normally be in Palm Springs for the two week Modernism Week festivities. Maybe next year but not as long as Bill is here. We're pretty well settled into our routine now. However, I do miss my hotel job. Again, maybe next year. Working part-time at the hotel. Trips with Pat to Philly, Canada and Palm Springs. Something to look forward too.

Ron Enjoys A Treat on The Rehoboth Beach Boardwalk

Last week during Pat's visit we took several jaunts down to the Rehoboth Beach boardwalk. A treat I rarely have availed myself since I moved to southern Delaware lo these fourteen years ago. If I do go to the boardwalk, it is in the off season. I just cannot abide the traffic to get to the boardwalk in the summertime. However, since Pat was visiting, we drove down to the beach in his rental car.

The video above shows me sloppily licking one of those soft ice cream cones. This particular cone had an orange flavored coating. Delicious! 

Back when I was a very young man I used to enjoy ice cream. Over the years I have lost my taste for regular ice cream. I don't know if it was me or the manufactured taste of ice creams that food makers are all too guilty of injecting into our foodstuffs these days. It's a wonder they don't put garlic powder in ice cream, they put garlic powder into just about everything else these days to make up for the loss of flavor of manufactured food.

Pat is back in Canada and I'm back to my regular routine of caring for Bill. While Pat was down here I found that I could take a shuttle bus to Rehoboth Beach to avoid the traffic and I may do that in the future. However, there is no substitution for doing the boardwalk with a good friend, breathing that ocean breeze and imbibing in the summer vibe and feeding my face with a fabulous orange crusted soft ice cream.

Cataract Surgery A Success!

 

Ready for my cataract surgery last Thursday

My cataract surgery was a success!

Last Thursday I entered the Delaware Eye Institute with loads of trepidation. My late younger brother had a botched cataract surgery a few years ago that ruined his eyesight in his right eye. He found out after the surgery he was the first ever patient of a young woman. I guess everyone has a 'first time". Unfortunately my brother was the innocent victim of her failure.

I knew my eye doctor of fourteen years was going to perform my cataract surgery and that was some relief. However, I was still nervous. Pat had arrived the previous Sunday (first time I've seen him in person in two and a half years) but I just couldn't get into his visit because I was concerned about my upcoming cataract surgery. Pat assured me I had nothing to worry about and he was right. My surgery was a breeze,

I was put under a "twilight" sedation (Vicodin) which I was told "You'll know what is going on but you won't care." Actually I remember being wheeled into the surgery room with a bright light overhead and seeing my doctor round the corner towards me but after that . . . . nothing. Now I can understand why people get hooked on a drug like Vicodin. I literally didn't care and in fact I don't even remember anything. Great! That's just the way I like it.

The first day out I had to wear an eye patch. Not a pirate eyepatch but a clear eyepatch with holes in it so my eye could breath. 

One thing I noticed right away was the colors. SO BRIGHT, especially the blues and whites! I didn't realize I was looking through the world in yellow parchment (like this old copies of the U. S. Declaration of Independence). I thought my left eye was all right but when I close my right eye I can see where my left  eye casts a dirty yellow haze over everything. That cataract surgery is scheduled for next month. I can't wait!

Now I have the annoying chore of applying a series of expensive (out of pocket) eye drops daily to my repaired eye. Well worth it for the vision I can see now. And another thing that is fabulous, I can see at a distance without glasses. I started off in life being near sighted. Now it's the opposite. I need glasses for reading but I don't need glasses for distance. Pat and my friend Larry had the same experience after their cataract surgery. I'll take it! I could have paid extra and had the bi-focal cataract surgery but I didn't want to take that chance. I don't mind wearing glasses to read.

Oh, by the way, I had a fabulous week with Pat down here. We hit some new restaurants and the boardwalk in Rehoboth Beach. The only downside was the oppressive heat. Just too hot but more about that later in future blog posts. I have to get ready for my one week post op surgery visit to my doctor. 

If you haven't had cataract surgery, get it! This is great. It's like I have a new pair of eyes which, actually, I do! 

Thoughts On My New Role As A FullTime Caregiver

Yesterday morning Bill and I completed a task that was delayed by his accident last month, updating his end of life documents.

Our lawyer brought Bill's end of life documents out to our car for his signature. Two witnesses also came out to stand by our car in the sunny cold air which was parked in front of the lawyer's office on Rehoboth Avenue in Rehoboth Beach, to witness Bill signing his documents. That task done I decided to take the three block ride down to the Rehoboth Beach boardwalk and take a walk. I love walking on the boardwalk during offseason days like yesterday. The ocean, with the waves rolling in on the cold sand, is the same but the crowds are gone. Just a few brave souls walking the boards with the cold ocean air winds, so tranquil and peaceful. Something I need during this change in our lives. But while I was waiting for copies that were being made for me of Bill's end of life documents, I watched the people bustling around my lawyer's office. I thought to myself, "I used to be like that. I had a job for many years at a bank in Philadelphia. I commuted every day to Philadelphia from Downingtown to my job as a trust operations manager. I worked right in center city Philadelphia with all that hustle and bustle. I would manage and supervise thirty some people to get that day's trust remittances, statements, and fees out the door for that day. I would meet friends for lunch. I would take the R-5 train home at the end of the day. Bill would be waiting for me at the train station in his Jeep Cherokee. We would ride home to our two story gambrel roofed farmhouse on seven acres of wooded land. Our three Pomeranian dogs would be so excited to see me, yapping and jumping all over me.  I would take a shower, come down from my upstairs bedroom/bathroom and make dinner. Then perhaps I would watch a little TV or in the summertime, with daylight savings time, do some years work. I would go to bed around eleven o'clock. Get up at 4:30 AM the next morning, have breakfast and catch the 6:02 AM R-5 Septa express train for the hour commute to Philadelphia. Then I would do it all over again, five days a week. I thought nothing of that routine. That was my life. Now, I have memories. This is the week I would have been in Palm Springs for a two week stay with my Canadian buddy Pat F. That plane left yesterday without me, because of COVID. Just as well, because if COVID wasn't here I couldn't have went anyway. Who know when I'll ever be able to go again. Little did I know last year at this time as Pat and I sat in the courtyard of a popular local Palm Springs coffee shop, luxuriating in our easy life that my life would take such a turn. I would never have guessed in a million years a global pandemic would totally uproot life as we know it on our planet. And that I would be the full-time caregiver for my lover/parnter/companian/husband  of fifty six years. That today, instead of enjoying a mocha latte in Palm Springs I would be cleaning pee off our wall to wall carpeting that leads to Bill's bathroom, and changing his Pampers underpants and yoga pants and trying to explain to him that he should push his red Med-Doorbell button alert that I have hanging around his neck so I can help him go to the bathroom (my life now revolves around attending to his bathroom needs) and we wouldn't have to go through undressing him from his urine soaked yoga pants and Pampers and putting new ones on him. He said he "thought he made it" to the bathroom urinal jug that I have there for him.  He still hasn't figured out to hold the jug.  He was so exhausted after changing that he listened to me to push that red button that's hanging on a lanyard around his neck. It's going to be much easier on him (and me) if he lets me know when he "has to go." Five years ago, when I tore my left leg quadricep muscle, I had a cast on for twelve weeks. The first several weeks Bill had to help me go to the bathroom. I would call him on his phone (that's when he knew how to operate his iPhone, he doesn't now, I got rid of it several months ago). Bill would do the same for me if I was in the situation he is in now. 

A friend of mine (Glenn), who recently lost his husband of thirty-one years, and who he was a caregiver for about four years, told me "this is the price we pay for having such a loving relationship." I agree with him. I've known for years that Bill and I are one of the lucky few who have a long, loving relationship. 

Since Bill's medical emergency last month, my most of my waking hours are consumed with taking care of Bill. I've been advised to "take some time" for myself but it's difficult when I am the sole caregiver. I was able to do that yesterday when I parked our car, sunny side on Bill's side. He loves to sit in our car in the sun. I left him there, at the parking lot at the end of the boardwalk, and embarked on my first walk in weeks. My legs were begging for the exercise. And oh it felt so good to walk, with the ocean breeze briskly stinging my face (the portion that wasn't covered by my mask).  

I took some videos, one of which is at the beginning of this blog. During my walk I thought of friends who I used to contact when I was in Rehoboth Beach talking a walk "on the boards." I couldn't contact Ed C., he died several years ago. He had a nice cottage three blocks from the boardwalk. I couldn't contact Wayne J., he died in 2015. He also lived near the boardwalk. I also couldn't contact my best friend Bob Mc., he died seven years ago. A wave of sadness washed over me. I thought to myself "I have no one to call. These people all going about their lives, taking so much for granted and I am entering the final chapter, act, phase of my life."

As I type this blog entry, I hear the rumbling sounds of Bill's walker on our now rugless floor boards, doing his daily exercise. We've been waiting all morning for our local heating and air conditioning service company to perform their annual maintenance on our heating system. They were supposed to be here between 8:00 AM and 12: AM. It is now 11:32 AM, no service company. No phone call. I called the company and they said they're still coming out, but they're just running "a little behind."  

Bill's quality of life is greatly diminished. He's frustrated because he can't do what he used to do. 

Yesterday was his first full day of taking his medications. He couldn't sleep last night. The one medication I didn't give him was a mood drug because I thought that's what they gave him at the rehab facility where he was staying to keep him calmed down because he was "agitated."  Bill hasn't had a problem sleeping since he got home but he did last night. And of course if he isn't sleeping, I'm not sleeping either. We decided that he should take the Seroquel. That did the trick. He went to sleep. Of course he's confused now and sort of out of it. He had an "accident" this morning. Didn't quite make it to the bathroom for his pee break. He still can't quite get the hang of the urinal jug. 

By the way, the service guy just came. The window of time was 8 AM to 12 PM. It is now 12:20 PM. Why am I always on the end of the window? Wherever I live, I'm on the end of the window of time. Oh well. 

After he leaves I'm going to go down to Staples and buy another roll of plastic carpet covering to extend Bill's walkway from his downstairs bedroom to his bathroom, trying to prevent any more urine hitting our wall to wall carpet. Trying to take precautions and please no warnings about Bill  tripping on the plastic rug covering. I'm not removing the wall to wall carpeting. I've already removed all the rugs upstairs where he exercises with his walker.

Still no word on his hearing aids. He is so frustrated that he can't hear as I am trying to communicate with him. That's another phone call I'll have to make from Caregiver Central here.

This is the sixth day since Bill came home from the rehab hospital. We're getting a routine worked out. Of course my whole life now revolves around caring for Bill. Maybe I can snatch a bit of time here and there to update this blog and catch up with my friends Pat, Larry, Don and Glenn on FaceTime. Don called me last night on FaceTime. Don is 84 years old and lives in center city Philadelphia in a co-op. He's doing well but he is 84 years old. I'll be 80 years old next year. I wonder what is in store for us? I certainly don't see a caregiver in my future. Nor do I want to. This is no quality of life for Bill. But at least he's here in the comfort of his own home even if he can't do the things he used to. I feel so bad for him but I tell him every day how much I love him which I am so thankful for to have that opportunity. I thought I had lost him forever last month when I found him unconscious on the floor. 

This is the best we can do at this time. I guess I always knew this day was coming. Could be a lot worse. Just looking forward to getting into a routine and having a new normal. That's the most we can hope for at this time.

Bill and few minutes ago

On This Day June 23, 2014

Well folks, did I go to Rehoboth Beach yesterday? 

No I didn't. I took one look (or maybe two) at the traffic streaming down Route One to Rehoboth Beach and decided to forego that headache.  

I might go this week. Weekends are out, at least during the summer season. I've sat in that traffic to know it's no fun to stop and start down Route One just to find no parking available in Rehoboth.

During my walk this morning I stopped and talked to my neighbor Howard.  He said the best time to go to the boardwalk is early in the morning, real early.  Years ago, when I first got my Subaru, I used to go early, around 6 am and leave before the morning weekday rush of traffic at 8 am. I also didn't have to pay for parking. These days, I usually don't get up until around 7 or 7:30 am.  However this morning I did get up at 6 am. Maybe later this week I'll venture down that way. I need some new photos and videos for my "productions" that I've been featuring lately on my blog. I'm loving these Memories that my iPhone produces, with a little editing by me. Takes the laborious work out of producing them on my iMac by iMovie. Plus I save a lot of space on my computer by storing my productions in my account at You Tube. 

Today is a beautiful day, unlike the past several days when the humidity was overbearing. I just can't work outside in that heat and humidity. Last week I almost passed out after only doing about a half an hour of pulling weeds. I still have a big pile of mulch to lay. I enjoy working outside but not in the heat and humidity we had last week. 

I'm off now to Milton and the veggie stand. Have to get some of those Georgia peaches for my morning cereal.

Have a great day!

Note: featured in todays video is Pat (of course at his previous home in Toronto, Canada). Our home with our wonderful back yard oasis.  And lastly Rehoboth Beach and Semara, the hostess and owner (and a belly dancer) at a fabulous Middle Eastern restaurant in Rehoboth Beach called (of all things) "Semara's Mediterranean Grill.

This was the last time I was at her restaurant. Have to go back.  I LOVE falafels!

Rehoboth Beach This Time Last Year

Bill and I live in a resort area. We live ten miles from Rehoboth Beach, Delaware.  

The trip to Rehoboth Beach in normal traffic takes about twelve minutes. "Normal traffic", alas in the summertime "normal traffic" moves like a lava flow.  Even though getting to Rehoboth Beach is a straight shot from our development straight down Coastal Highway (Route One), traversing four lanes of clogged highway is no fun.  Thus, I rarely if ever visit the boardwalk in Rehoboth Beach during the season. 

The season lasts from Memorial Day to Labor Day. For most of us year round residents, we venture little if ever to Rehoboth Beach.  There are plenty of days in the off season when we can visit Rehoboth Beach. Of course those days we're missing experience the "summer feel" of throngs of tourists and people watching. Many of the shops, restaurants and other facilities are closed except on the weekends. 

Today is a warm, summery day. I'm thinking of taking Bill and taking that ten mile trip down to Rehoboth Beach today. After all, think of all those thousands of people who travel many miles to visit  Rehoboth Beach, braving all that traffic. Surly I can endure ten miles. 

Yes, I think I will go today. 

"Hey Bill, want to take a ride to Rehoboth Beach?"

New Friends

Mike and Bob, new friends

Regular readers of this blog will know that I have often mentioned my disappointment in making friends in the large gay community here in Rehoboth Beach area of southern Delaware.

One of the reasons I moved to Delaware for my retirement in addition to escaping the high taxes of my former home state of Pennsylvania was the large gay community.  When Bill and I lived in Pennsylvania, we were often ostracized by some neighbors just because we were gay. I have blogged about those experiences in previous postings and won't rehash those terrible times where we were discriminated against just because we were two gay men living together in a suburban home some thought belonged only to straight couples. That was a sad and depressing time of our lives which I do not wish to revisit.

Bill and I have been living here since 2006. In that time we have made five (Wayne, Bob, David, Ted and  gay friends, one of which has already died. Ironically, our best friends are out neighbors Bob and Barb, who are straight and conservative Republicans. We have also made other straight friends. We didn't seek them, it just turned out that way. 

For a few years I used to attend a weekly dine out with fifteen to twenty gay members of the local community. I gave up on that social function several years ago. 

I even joined the local organization (Camp Rehoboth) thinking I would make gay friends.  Didn't happen.  That organization's focus is on raising money and not welcoming other gays to their community unless they're in their clique (mostly Washington D.C. gays).  That's another whole story that I'm not going into at this time other to say that I have made several good faith efforts to be a nice guy and offer my friendship only to be rebuffed and ignored. Hey, I don't beg for friendships. The only interaction I had with them was when that came to be to give them money for their organization. If that's the only time they feel fit to talk to me, then I don't need them.  I left.

Then this weekend I had a pleasant surprise . I placed a request in our local NextDoor app for someone to help a "76 year old man who has average knowledge of Apple computers and who makes house call is patient."  I've engaged with computer guys before but the ones I have dealt with are smart asses, charge a lot and don't tell me anything lest I learn something and don't need them in the future. 

I had several responses to my request.  The first gentleman I talked to sounded pleasant. Because he sounded young I was suspicious he was one of those wise guys I dealt with before. I asked him how old he was.  He said he was 67 years old. Good sign. Maybe he wouldn't take advantage of my ignorance of computers and actually help me, which I am willing to pay for, and also at the same time help me learn.  Coincidentally while he was talking to my two airport utility backup towers. They were flashing amber and I didn't know why. He told me bring up utilities on my computer where I saw updates.  He advised me that the blinking amber lights was only an update which I did. The blinking amber lights went off.  Wow!  Someone helped me and didn't take advantage of me.  I offered to pay him but he refused. Wow! What a pleasant surprise, someone who isn't taking advantage of my ignorance of computers and being nice to me.

Well, this blog is going on long so let me wrap this up.  The next day this gentleman came over. His name is Mike. He and his partner have been together forty-one years. I visited Mike and his partner the next day. I visited Mike and his spouse Bob the next day. They live nearby. I found them to be a very pleasant couple. I have new friends. 

You will hear more about them in future posts. 

Morning at the Beach

Finally, a nice summer day here in southern Delaware. It seems for most of the summer the days have been unbearably hot and humid. Too uncomfortable to just take a walk on the boardwalk in Rehoboth Beach. However,  this morning was an exception.  Bill agreed to go with me for the ten mile ride down Route One early this morning to Rehoboth Beach.  

I love walking on the boardwalk in RehobothBeach.  There is a certain spring on "the boards" that I find very pleasant when walking.  My legs and butt cheeks just feel so good during my daily walk. I usually take my walk through the development here where we live.  This walk is pleasant enough, a clean and quiet neighborhood. However, I am walking on a macadam road dodging the occasional car coming in and out of our development.  Not much of interest to look at either.  Same houses and landscaping.  I do run into the occasional neighbor who is also walking or taking a bike ride.  

Walking on the boardwalk in Rehoboth Beach is so much better.  Lot's of interesting people watching.  And I get free parking if I get to Rehoboth early because the the meters don't become active until 10 AM.  

When I first got my new car in 2010 I used to drive down to Rehoboth almost every day for my walk.  Then I noticed I was really racking up the mills on my car and filling my gas tank more frequently.  Plus, I was putting myself at risk of having an accident on our notorious Route One (Coastal Highway).  So after careful evaluation and somewhat ruefully, I decided not to make that morning run to Rehoboth Beach for my morning walk.  A couple of mornings I was at the boardwalk so early I noticed some suspicious characters lurking around looking for an easy mugging victim.  No thank you.  I was already mugged once when I lived in Philly (gun pulled on my demanding "You life or your money!")  Once is enough.

My walk was so refreshing this morning that I have decided to do it again tomorrow.  No yoga classes though!

Larry's Birthday in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware 2016

Once a year I visit Rehoboth Beach in the height of the summer season.  As a local (ten years now), I avoid Rehoboth Beach from Memorial Day until after Labor Day. Yep, I give it up. Even though I only live ten miles straight up the road (Route One), from Rehoboth Beach, I do not go into Rehoboth.  Just too much traffic.  Like slow molasses trying to drive into Rehoboth Beach.

The one time I visit is when I take my long time friend Larry Meredith out for lunch for his birthday, which was yesterday, June 27th.  

Three years ago I started the tradition of getting our old time photo taken and then taking Larry to lunch. We didn't do the old time photo today, we did that last month when Pat was down.  But we did do lunch.  

One of the requests I make of Larry though is that he drive.  I just cannot take that traffic.  

Traffic wasn't too bad today.  Probably because it was an overcast day with the threat of rain.  However, Rehoboth was still plenty crowded but at least we weren't elbow to elbow people.


Both of us had trouble walking today. Well, we're both in our middle 70's. However, we did have a good day. We'll do it again next year!

Hang On Sloopy

Drone view of Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

It has begun, the annual assault onslaught of coastal Sussex County Delaware. Yes folks, our Summertime Visitors are and have arrived with a vengeance.  Of course the 80 degree plus sunny clear skies weather has released this damn dam of summertime visitors. 

I think I see friends there in the upper right corner under the orange beach umbrella!

Hey folks, who am I to complain? We don't make anything here on the east coast of Sussex County.  At least the Sussex County natives who live more inland raise chickens and farm crops for a living.  There are no steel mills (never were) or furniture factories around here.  Back in a previous life, the natives here on the eastern shores of Rehoboth Beach, Lewes and Milton eked out a living fishing and making Mother of Pearl buttons by punching out old oyster shells.  But those days are long gone folks, only to be seen in black and white photos in big picture books at the various historical society buildings in Lewes and Milton which very few people ever enter those doors (Bill and I being the exception).  

Folks, this annual influcks influx of flip flop wearing, tank topped attired, free spending folks from northern Delaware, and the surrounding states of Pennsylvania, Maryland, Virginia, New Jersey (a lot since Hurricane Sandy) and the District of Columbia (we call them "D.C.") IS our economy.  

We are a service orientated economy.  Those folks are our lifeblood.  Without them we would be just another musty, sleepy fishing village with a lot of memories.  

Works for me

Instead, we're a vibrant, traffic congested, over priced restaurants, salt water taffy eating, feed-the-seagulls Thrashers French fries community.  That said, we locals will now stay away from Rehoboth Beach until after Labor Day.  

Touristias?  It's all yours.  Open those wallets and spend freely and try not to hit any of us locals as you speed down Route One towards your hot sands beach destination of the Atlantic Ocean.  

Tear Down

My friend Ed Cage during better days, when the sun shone

Last year on January 27th, my longtime friend (since 1956) friend Ed Cage died.  

Ed, near the last time I saw him at his house - he was very ill with cancer

I've known Ed since high school. Ed was my longest gay friend. And by the way, strictly platonic for those of you who are wondering. My friend Larry is my longest straight friend.  Notice that I don't say "oldest" although both of them are/were my same age.

Me and Ed during one of my many visits to his house on Laurel Street

Ed lived in Pennsylvania.  He also had a home in Rehoboth Beach at 306 Laurel Street.  He purchased his home in Rehoboth beach with proceeds from his lottery winnings, which was interesting because Ed was a millionaire through inheritance.  Isn't that often the case? The guy with money wins more but I digress.

Ed in his renovated kitchen - I loved that kitchen - Ed did too - all blue and white and lots of light with the skylight which I suggested he put in

Ed had a nice, cozy home right in the heart of Rehoboth Beach.  I had the opportunity to stay at his place in 2005 while I was scoping out my possibilities for moving to Delaware.  While I knew I couldn't afford to live in Rehoboth Beach proper, I did have the opportunity to check out where I wanted to live in this area.  I quickly found out that I didn't want to live in Rehoboth Beach because I didn't want to contend with the summertime traffic.  But while I stayed at Ed's (which was in the winter), I enjoyed my stay.

Ed's breakfast nook in his kitchen - we exchanged much gossip here

Ed's blue and white kitchen bathed in natural light that I so loved - Ed did too

I often visited Ed when he came down for the weekend.  It was a comfort to me to know that I could call Ed anytime and ask him if he wanted to go out for dinner.  Ed almost always was available.  

Me at Ed's breakfast nook - I was always welcomed

When Ed died last year I told Bill "Watch, when they sell Ed's house they'll tear it down".  For you see folks, these days when someone dies in the cottage areas of Rehoboth Beach proper, their homes are almost always a tear down.  In their place goes one of the ever increasing mini hotels, which are rapidly destroying the unique character of downtown Rehoboth.  It's a shame. 

This morning I took Bill on one of our thrift store tours.  On the way back I said to Bill "Let's go into Rehoboth and see if they tore down Ed's house."  Well folks, guess what.  The sign was out front.  The demolition is about to begin.  

Ed's now vacant house this morning - the red sign out in front is the notice of demolition

306 Laurel Street, Rehoboth Beach - soon to be gone and replaced with a mini-hotel

The view of Ed's kitchen from the back this morning - the sun still shines through 

Bill looking in the kitchen

Bill and me this morning at Ed's house - his kitchen behind us

Ah, the fond memories of all those times I visited Ed.  Ed did have a very comfy house.  What is a shame, that he just had his whole kitchen redone a few years ago.  I loved that house.

Hey Ed, why didn't you just leave your house to me? I could have saved it.