Monday, March 07, 2016

Colonoscopy Time Again


That time again?

Oh yes, I can no longer deny the inevitable.  It is colonoscopy time again.  

I had my last colonoscopy in 2011.  My family on the male side, has a history of colon cancer.  My uncle Sam and my cousin Jeffery, both who always refused to have colonoscopies, both died of colon cancer.  I'll always remember what my Aunt Shelby (Uncle Sam's wife) told me when she urged her husband to have a colonoscopy.  He said "No man is going to stick his finger up my ass!"  Well, he's dead now.  He was only 67 years old.

My cousin Jeffrey was only 49 years old when he died of colon cancer.

This year I will be 75 years old.  I've lived a long time but I would like to live a few years longer.  Maybe ten or fifteen years longer?

I'll take another 24 years!


I've had four colonoscopies so far.  My second colonoscopy the doctor found two benign polyps. Although not cancerous, such polyps could turn cancerous if left undetected.

Thank goodness I'll be knocked at at this juncture


So here we go folks. While the actual colonoscopy is a "breeze", the difficult part is the night before when you have to take the prep.  God, it is awful.  

You have to drink four liters of a green solution (eight ounces every half hour) that tastes like lime flavored antifreeze.  Then, and this the "best" part, once the solution hits, you peeing out your ass a black solution.  Sorry folks if I grossed out anyone but man oh man, I'm not looking forward to this.

My first appointment is April 18th, to go over my medical history since my last colonoscopy.  Here we go folks.  



By the way, I called Medicare this morning to see if I was eligible.  Oh yes, I am a glutton for punishment but hey, I'm not ready to check out yet.  So I do what I must to maintain this aging body for a few more years of good times.

16 comments:

  1. Ron,

    Why are you having a colonoscopy so soon? They are recommended every 10 years for men over 50 until reaching the mid-to-late 70 and then shouldn't need them even less, f ever again. Now I understand you having a history of colon cancer in the family, but still have you had any indications that it is needed, but it has only been 5 years.

    Lar

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    1. Lar,
      They call anoscopy it's recommended every five years when there's a history of colon cancer in the family. That's why I'm having it now. Believe me I don't want to have it but I also don't want to contact colon cancer and die.

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  2. Ron - hilarious blog - tho not so funny when participating. I put off colonoscopies way beyond the 50 year age that they recommend you go up here in Ontario. I passed the ordeal and was told to come back in 10 years. I thought the doctor was just making a crack (passing, crack, - no puns intended). But apparently if you look clear you wait 10 years. The prep ordeal is incredible. The solution I had to ingest was not bad from a taste point of view - but the VOLUME. Why does it have to be the same volume for everyone. I thought my stomach was going to burst or I'd be filled to the neck allowing nothing more in. Oh well - it's good to get done from what you've mentioned in your blog. Hope you can manage it without too much difficulty.

    Pat

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    1. Pat,
      I dread the preparation the night before. I DREAD it.
      But it's something must be done.
      Ron

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    2. Ron and Pat,

      Well, you can go on YouTube and look at the film I made of doing the preparation when I had my last. I didn't think it was too bad. What I had to drink didn't taste bad. I tried to make the film amusing.

      Lar

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    3. Lar,
      Both Pat and I think the "prep" the night before is horrendous. HORRENDOUS! Probably because we don't drink a lot of liquid. Drinking four liters of liquid in a short period of time gags both of us
      Ron

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  3. Just thinking about the prep made me gag ..... fortunately I have 2 more years before its "that time again"

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    Replies
    1. I'm dreading that night before"prep" Roger.
      Ron

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  4. Ron:
    I am glad you are keeping on top of your health concerns. Too many people do not take Medical Tests because they are afraid of the tests or the results. I wish you good results next month.

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    1. Linda,
      My good friend and longtime former boss discovered he had colon cancer during a routine examination. He was given a 1 in 4 change of survival. He had an eight hour operation to remove the cancer. His cancer came back. He had another 8 hour operation. He underwent experimental treatment. Again, he was given a 1 in 4 chance of not living longer than six months. He sold his house and put his wife up in a community where she wouldn't have to worry about mowing the lawn. This was over six years ago. He survived. His doctor told him if he had waited until he saw symptoms of his colon cancer he would be dead now. Since I have a history of colon cancer in the paternal side of my family, I get a colonoscopy every five years. This is my fifth. I don't want to die just yet. Maybe something will get me, surely something will eventually get me but it probably won't be colon cancer. Not prostate cancer either, which I discovered I had three years ago during a routine blood test. Thanks for your good wishes.
      Ron

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    2. Ron,
      I am glad your friend is well. I also have a very good friend who for years would not go to the gynecologist because it hurt to much. I will spare you the details. Last year she finally went and found out she had cervical and uterine cancer. She has survived but she now has to wear a bag to pass urine. The cancer had spread. She is well, but will be retiring in May. Life is too darn short.

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    3. Ron,
      I forgot to comment about your routine blood test and prostate cancer, I think that is when I first discovered your blog by accident. I was looking for articles about retiring in Delaware. I am glad you are well and I am so grateful I found your blog. Your blog is so much fun to read. Take care, Ron.

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  5. Anonymous6:32 PM

    There are alternatives to the golytely that are just as effective but don't taste so god awful. Miralax in gatorade along with a few ducolax laxatives do the trick and do not taste near as bad - results are the same as you will be glued to the toilet for hours!!!!!

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous,
      I will check with my doctor about my options for the prep liquid the night before.
      Ron

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    2. Anonymous12:31 PM

      I too freaked out when I was issued the huge golytely tankard to be filled with water for consumption prior to my scheduled anal probe. I immediately opted to go with the Dulcolax+Miralax prep and also decided to skip adding the Miralax to abominably salty Gatorade, since it has almost no flavor and plain tap water is, after all, a "clear liquid" almost everywhere in the US that's not Flint, Michigan. My gastroenterologist‎ commended my colon's squeaky clean condition after snipping one benign polyp and pronouncing me good to go for another 5 years.

      Bob in Cincinnati

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  6. You remind me I am overdue for my next one.

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