Monday, April 13, 2009

Reevaluation Time




Last Thursday morning I woke up with a cold. Just last week I was bragging how I haven’t had a cold since I moved to Delaware in November of 2006. In fact, I haven’t had a cold since 2001, when I caught a horrific cold attending a Christmas memorial service at the Terry Funeral Home in Downingtown, Pennsylvania. I knew I was going to catch the cold of my life at that time when I entered the little room packed with folks of all ages who were coughing, sneezing and sniffling. Oh did I ever catch a cold. I thought I was going to die. At times I wish I did. But, I survived to tell the tale.

Now here I am again eight years later struggling through each day with deep hacking coughs, runny nose, watery eyes, and aching bones. Thank goodness I left my address canvassing job with the Census Bureau. There was no way I could be out there in the wind, rain and cold. I surely would have pneumonia. I think I caught this cold from a co-worker at the hotel. She came into work last Monday with a terrible cold that she couldn’t shake. Later in the week, when she couldn’t shake the cold, she went to her doctor and was diagnosed walking pneumonia.

As in the past when I’ve had colds, I’m trying to work through this cold by getting plenty of rest and drinking a lot of fluids. I’ve had enough sleep in the past three days to last me a month. This morning at 11:30 I have a dental appointment in Dover. My new bridge is in and this is for the initial fitting. When I get back home, it’s to bed again. I’m scheduled to go to work this Friday for four days in a row. I plan to get plenty of rest so when I go to work this weekend I’ll be healthy and alert and on my best.

Talking about being my best, these past few weeks have made me aware again that there are people and situations that bring out the best in me and bring out the worst in me. I had thought I had this situation under control sometime ago but, apparently I have not. It is time for a reevaluation. I am going to spend more time with those friends who bring out the best in me and who genuinely enjoy my company as I do theirs. They know who they are. Also, I will only participate in those activities that I enjoy. Life is too short to do otherwise. Just last week another friend of mine told me they had cancer. I have to make every day count before my number comes up. We owe it to ourselves and our friends and family who care about us to be the best we can all the time.

In the past few weeks I have encountered situations that have brought out the worst in me. I blame myself for allowing this to happen. In one situation Bill and I visited a longtime friend. Bill wanted to help him with his TV connection. I brought him a couple of books (extra copies that I purchased myself especially for him) as a gift. This friend has a partner who is very jealous. While Bill and I were visiting our friend, the partner comes out of his bedroom, heads for the front door and when we ask him were he is going we’re greeting with the F-word and GD’s. This is a typical reaction from this person to our visits. I think it’s time we stopped visiting. Life is too short for this nonsense. Ironically, I was also delivering a musical CD from the choir master of the choir Mr. Nasty was in. I wasnt' expecting profuse thanks but a simple "Thank you" would have sufficed. Not from this person though, he is so full of self loathing that he can't help himself when he spreads his negative attitude around.

Earlier in the week, I received a hateful comment on my blog that it was “too personal, boring, and detailed.” First, who asked this person? Second, why read my blog if it is too personal, boring and detailed?” What has always puzzled me is why someone finds it necessary to tear down someone else and try to control their life? Don’t they have their hands full with their own life? To me, this is just another example of a person with a great deal of self hate trying to spread his/her poison to others. I am so tired of this type of person. I’m done with them. No more. I remember something that Phyllis Diller (that great philosopher) said some years ago "I got rid of all the negative people and influences in my life and now I am much happier" (or words to that effect.)

Spring is almost here. Rebirth and new growth is all around. Once the temperatures warm up I will be outside enjoying the fresh air and working in my flower beds. There are few activities I enjoy more than working outside being one with nature. But first, I have to get rid of this cold.

7 comments:

  1. Ron,

    Just be careful with your cold. I had one several years ago, and I tend toward get some rest and drink the liquids and it goes away. In this case I finally did go to my doctor and was told it was good I came because i was on the verge of pneumonia.

    Take care.

    Lar

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  2. Anonymous11:46 AM

    I don't mean to bug you but you are right on in this mornings post. My younger sister has a very critical temperment along with a cruel tongue. While my mother was alive I had to endure it to a point but I decided after she passed away that I was done with that toxic relationship, sister or not. There was one way on this earth and that was her way. There was no way I was living my life anymore trying to be kind & loving to her & receive such abuse. It's not me, as she's the same with my older sister, her husband & daughter. I did all I could & she has backed her self in a corner now with the rest of the famly. Life is much better since my decision. She lives 2 miles from me but our paths rarely cross. I wish her no harm. I love her because she is my sister but that's where it stops.
    I wish my company from RI would get here soon. I'm ready to enjoy the next couple of days, eating out & showing them around the Eastern Shore.

    Fran

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  3. Lar,
    I'm thinking of going to the doctor tomorrow because I can't seem to shake this cold. It is terrible. I'm pretty sure I caught it from my co-worker who found out she had pneumonia.

    If I wake up tomorrow and it isn't any better, I'm calling the doctor. This has to get better.

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  4. Fran,

    We're on the same page as to how to handle relatives and friends who are super critical. I don't hate them and I don't wish them ill but I am done with tolerating their behavior. My life is too short to continue to accept such behavior. I'm not sure where these people are coming from. I think some of it is jealousy and a measure of low self esteem. They feel a need to tear down someone else.

    I wish them a happy and healthy life but I am so tired of accepting their behavior just because it is my nature to be a "nice guy." Unfortunately, some take this as a weakness and have a lack of respect and treat me in a cruel and dismissive manner.

    I'm suffering through one of the worst colds I've ever had in my life. I'm finding I have absolutely no patience for ill mannered and rude behavior. I am done with it.

    You made the absolutely right decision with your sister. I have a similar situation with my brother. I have two brothers. One I get along with quite fine. The other, not so fine. I keep my distance. He's still my brother and I love him but it is best if we keep our distance. This is just a fact of life.

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  5. Sorry I am late to the party. Hope you did see your Dr. And you are on the mend.

    As for the critical readers, nobody's holding a gun to their heads and while I appreciate positive input, I don't need a negative review - especially when they choose to remain Anonymous.

    Credibility lost, immediately.

    Hope you feel better by now.

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  6. I'm on the mend. Thank you for your concern and advice.

    You're right about critical comments while they chose to remain "Anonymous." Credibility lost, immediately.

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  7. A comment sent by e-mail from my longtime friend Penney.

    Ron, don't worry about others. Most likely they are jealous. Why shouldn't blogs be about the person that created one?

    I always find your blogs very interesting. Please continue them.

    Penney

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