Surprise!

The day after the day after and I'm still riding a natural high.  This is a wonderful feeling folks!  Knowing that our country hasn't been taken over by the conservative right wing Republicans hell bent on destroying the social safety net, denying me the right for marriage equality and sending our country back to the 19th century with their regressive agenda.

Yesterday, while the latest nor'easter swept through our coastal enclave here on coastal Delaware, I decided just to coast through the day.  At 10 in the morning I had a class scheduled at Delaware Tech with Fay Jacobs and her humor writing class.  Of course there was a glitch (isn't there always)?  I went to room 997.  Opened the door to have about forty heads turn my way.  Uh oh, THIS MUST BE THE WRONG ROOM.  Hey, Fay gives a good class but the last class only had five folks attending.

I quickly closed the double doors to the OBVIOUS MEETING ROOM, leaving those seated wondering who WAS THAT MASKED MAN?  Gathering my thoughts, I wondered what room and what building Fay's writing class was changed to without informing me.  I made a call to Adult Plus (the Old People's Club I belong to - cute names for old people eh)? and got the correct room number which, of course, was in a different building.

So I'm out in the wind and rain again looking for the Whatever Building.  I find it and the room number and sure enough, there is Fay waiting behind the lectern.  We chatted a bit, waiting for the rest of the class participants to arrive.  We talked, and waited and talked and waited.  At 10:30 Fay became concerned that no one else was showing up.  I told her that she didn't have to conduct the class with me alone.  She agreed.  After a hug, we disbanded.  Apparently our fellow class members were too distraught about Tuesday's election results (we have a LOT of Repugs now here), they couldn't bring themselves to face two gay individuals who THEY KNEW voted for that Socialist Barack Obama.  Of course I'm making a BIG ASSUMPTION here but I think I'm on the right track.

So out in the wind and rain again Ron went.  After making a quick pit stop at the nearby B.J.'s to get gas and Panera soup, I headed back to Casa Tipton-Kelly.  After I got home I did something a little different.  Instead of working all day in my home office on my computer, I holed up in my bedroom, turned on my 60 inch Flat Screen Samsung TV, settled back in my lounger and just WATCHED all the post election coverage. I SAVORED it folks!

After a couple of hours of soaking in the pleasure of watching the coverage of the Republican circular firing squad, trying to figure out WHAT HAPPENED, I turned the TV off and had lunch.  After lunch a good long nap, while the wind and rain beat against my four bedroom windows. Best time to nap folks!

Fully refreshed I rose from the dead got up and checked the TV again and yes, I wasn't dreaming.  The Repugs did get skunked yesterday including a gain of TWO seats in the Senate for the Dems.  Thoroughly enjoyed watching TV folks, thoroughly.

Then I finally made it to my office and opened my e-mail.  I immediately saw a lot of Facebook notifications from my conservative/Republican friends and relatives in response to my Facebook posting stating that I was glad President Obama was reelected.  I read the usual "God intended" and "will pray for you" and all that religious nonsense (no offense to my religious friends who read this blog but PLEASE, don't lay your religiosity on me).  I deleted them all and even unfriended a few who I am just sick of their constant hateful comments about how our country is descending into a Socialist Hell.  At this time of my life, when I am about to turn 71 years of age, I am so tired of people trying to change me to their way of thinking. I don't try to change you so don't try to change me.  

Opening my e-mail I found a very pleasant surprise.  Yes, this is the "Surprise" that is indicated in the title of this blog posting, not the reelection of President Obama which isn't a surprise to me at all.  My longtime friend (since first grade - 1948) and very conservative friend sent me a copy of a letter I wrote to him when I was taking Army basic training at Ft. Dix, New Jersey during the bitter, cold winter days of March 1960.  The big "surprise" was the photo he enclosed!  This is the one and only photo I have of myself in my full uniform, with Army hat!  I didn't have this photo!  I had a chance to have one but I didn't purchase it because I thought I needed a haircut when it was taken.  I thought I would have another chance but it never happened during my three years in the Army.

I was so glad that my very conservative (and religious) friend didn't engage me in post election recriminations about how this country is going to go to Hell in a hand basket just because the most decent and honest man was reelected president.  I really didn't want to get into that with him because I have too much respect for our friendship and would have said something that I might have regretted later.  But as I said before, I'm just not talking any right-wing, Kool-Aid brainwashing shit from anybody right now, friends or not.

So I know this is a long posting (for which I do not make excuses, I just let it flow folks) but here is the picture and the letter.  We joked about the letter.  I told him I have copies of letters he sent to me also and would he like to see them.  He said "No!"  I don't blame him.  I read this letter that I wrote and I sound so juvenile. But hey, I was only a naive 18 year old at the time and scared shitless being in basic training ALL ALONE (because NONE of my friends would go in with me unlike a lot of other guys I knew in Basic Training who were there with their buddies).  Most, no make that ALL of the important, risky roads I have traveled down in my life I have traveled alone.  This was my first one, joining the Army.  It was a big change in my life and made me the person that I am today.  I just don't take any shit from anybody.  And I am thankful that I live in a country where I am able to make that statement. And that was one of the reasons I volunteered for the service of my country, so others can have the same freedom.

Letter from Army Basic Training March 21, 1960

Recruit Ronald W. Tipton, March 1960 - Ft. Dix, New Jersey

Day One of the Trip South

Here I sit in a hotel room at the Hampton Inn in Mebane. North Carolina. I'm trying to update my blog with my iPad and my teeny, tin keyboard working in HTML code. Maybe this is a blessing in disguise because this posting won't be too long. One thing I noticed right off the bat, no spell check. Watch out.

Sorry about the double pictures of the tulips. I only meant to post one but I had to put the pictures in draft form and I can't remove them from this post because I'm CONTRAINED! Bear with me.

We left early this morning. I did most of the driving (about six hours) until we got to Durham, North Carolina. That's when I started losing it. I just cannot drive long distances anymore. This will probably be my last road trip where I drive unless I can talk someone into driving (I'll rent the van and pay the hotel rooms plus meals! HINT! HINT!)

For those of you who know me and Bill, yes we started to argue only ten minutes into the ride. He wanted to go back. "TURN AROUND!" I worked it through (my life isn't easy believe me) and we managed another forty or fifty miles before we were screaming at each other. I won't bore you with all the gritty details but suffice it to say we're here now. We both agreed this will be our last road trip together. This is actually Bill's Farwell to his hometown of Toccoa Georgia. He wants to see it one more time before he departs this earth. The last time (last June) we made this trip it was to see my Mother for what I was pretty sure was the last time I would see her alive and it turned out to be true because she died three months after wse visited her. That's a sad story so I'll leave it.

By the way, this is tough typing without the use of a mouse. Hmmmm. I'm managing.

We had lunch at Shoney's. So, so. The iced tea was good and the hamburger was real although it wasn't cooked well done the way I prefer it. This evening we had dinner at Ruby Tuesday. Ruby Tuesday may be a chain restaurant but I find its food as good and usually better than the fare offered at pricier restaurants where I'm from, Beach Resort Town of Rehoboth Beach, Delaware. Bill had Chinese dumplings and I had Chicken Florentine (yes, no SEAFOOD again for moi).

Bill's in his room now and I'm here attempting to update my daily blog despite numerous obstacles which I'm not used to dealing with including this teeney, tiny iPad screed and teeny, tine keyboard (for my big fingers). We decided to get separate rooms this time because we're on different sleeping schedules. Bill goes to bed at 7 or so and I usually go much later. We truly have very little in common. Bill even eats at different times that I do.

Tomorrow after a sumptuous breakfast here at the Hampton Inn we're off to Greenville, South Carolina to spend a couple of days with my brother John and his wife Barbara. I'll be sleeping in the same bedroom (and bed) that my Mother died. That probably should bother me but it doesn't When I stay with my brother Isaac in Pennsylvania I also stay in our Mom's bedroom and her bed. That freaks my brother out. Doesn't bother me, probably because that was my bedroom before it was hers. One of my bedrooms in my house in Delaware I have set aside as a shrine to my Mom. She never slept there but I kept it for her. I've put a basket if ger teddy bears on the her bed and I have her funeral book and sympathy cards on a bench next to her bed. That is the room I feel like she is there. She left those other rooms. It's my turn now.

But I'm getting off the subject. You know me and my blogs. I write just what comes into my mind. You all never know where I'm going. Sometimes I don't even know!

Just a couple of more things off subject before I leave you all tonight. Did anybody see Donald J. Trump get skunked last night at the White House Correspondents Dinner. President Obama, with aplomb, style and class easily handed The Donald his ass on a platter. Then Seth Myers (the comedian master of ceremonies) then proceeded to rip Trump an New One. Trump wasn't laughing. I LOVED IT! I live for this kind of Theater.

There was one other thing I wanted to talk about but I forget what it was now. My brother just called me on my iPhone to check in on me. I'm being 'eyed' out here! Talking on my iPhone while typing on my iPad. Techno Wizard here folks! Who would've thunk?

I had to come down to the business center here at the hotel to complete this blog.  It's great to be back to a regular keyboard even if it is one of those clunkly Dell keyboards (brings back bad memories). 

I removed the double posting of my orange tulip pictures (one regular and one in HD).  I wish I could post some of the pictures I took today but I don't know how to do that.  There is probably a way but it is beyond my skills right at this time.  I'll figure it out in time though.  Just another challenge. 

The worst part of this trip is over with.  The Big Haul down through the Delmarva Pensinula ending with going through Virginia Beach and Norfolk - an absolute nightmare.  And I hate the Chesapeak Tunnel.  I get very nervous going under the bay in that narrow tunnel with oncoming traffic.  SCARY!  I'm pretty sure this is the last time I am making this trip.  We're going back home a different way.  Either we'll take 81 up to Pennsylvania to visit my other brother or we will go directly home to Delaware by way of Washington DC which is what I was trying to avoid all along.  It can't be any worse than Virginia Beach/Norfolk. 

So that folks is my First Day on my Trip South.  More tomorrow!

Don't Ask, Don't Tell Repealed

Jim Harris and Ron Tipton, Ft. George G. Meade Firing Range, September 1961

The Senate passed a bill today to repeal the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" law.  The vote was 65 to 31.  Thus comes to an end the official discrimination of gays and lesbians serving in the armed forces of the United State of America.  


This is something I never thought I would see in my lifetime.  


Fifty years ago I joined the Army right out of high school.  After graduating from high school I felt it was my obligation as a citizen of this country to join the armed forces.  


I knew at the time I was going to join the Army that I was gay.  However, back then in the Fifties, "gay" wasn't a commonly used term to describe homosexuals.  I knew I was a homosexual.  Even though I had no sexual experience of any kind, I knew I was "different."  I was sexually aroused by men.  I was not sexually aroused by women, no matter how hard I tried to convince myself otherwise.  


I did not know any other gay (homosexual) people.  The only thing I knew back then that there were dirty old men who hung around public bathrooms.  I knew I wasn't one of "them."  I didn't know what I was but I did know I was different.  Remember, this was back in the Fifties when information about gays and lesbians were not on TV or the media.  I lived a small town and I knew nothing about sex.  What I did know was that homosexuality was against the law.  I also knew that the church damed people who were homosexual.  I knew I had to keep secret what I was.  I didn't want to go to jail or be ostracized by my family or friends.  I knew I had a problem. 


Thus when I came upon the question on the Navy application papers "Do you have homosexual tendencies?"  I lied.  I knew if I answered "Yes" I was done.  I feared being arrested and being put in jail.  In the eyes of the law at that time I was a criminal.


I was originally going to join the Navy.  I wanted to see the world.  I had all my enlistment papers ready and all I had to do was pick them up from the Navy recruiter who was located in the basement of the Post Office in Coatesville, PA.  Also in that basement were the recruiters for the Air Force, Marines and Army.  


The day I went in to pick up my final enlistment papers the Navy recruiter was out to lunch.  While I was waiting for him, the Army recruiter started to engage me in conversation.  He asked my why I was joining the Navy.  I told him because I wanted to see the world.  He told me that I could also "see the world" in the Army but would only be obligated for a three year enlistment instead of a four year enlistment.  He said I could join the Army Security Agency which was 99% guaranteed to travel the world.  This sounded good to me so I changed my mind and informed the Navy recruiter of the same when he returned from lunch. 


Thus I made two tries in joining the Army.  The first time I failed the physical. It was determined that I was born with a hernia.  The Army wouldn't take me unless I had an operation (at my family's expense).  I was determined to join the Army so I had the operation and almost lost my life as a result of acquiring a staph infection which was misdiagnosed.  After three operations and a long stays in the contagion ward of the hospital, I was finally able to pass the Army physical.  I joined the Army January 27, 1960.


After I  completed basic training at Ft. Dix, I was sent Army Security school in Ft. Devens, Massachusetts.  I completed schooling in three months and irony of all ironies, was assigned to Ft. George G. Meade, Maryland for the remaining two and half years of my enlistment.  So much for seeing the world.  


Ft. Meade is the headquarters for the super secret spy agency, the National Security Agency or NSA.  At the time I worked there I wasn't even allowed to tell my family or friend where I worked.  I had a top secret clearance.  Homosexuals were not allowed to work for the National Security Agency because they were deemed a threat to national security because they could be blackmailed.  The reason for the blackmail?  If someone found out I was gay they could threaten to make public that fact.  This is a classic Catch-22 law but it was one I was trapped in.  Thus I had to lie again when I filled out my application papers to work at the National Security Agency.


At Ft. Meade I met the first gay people in my life.  Our meetings weren't any big revelatory thing, but rather a gradual understanding.  It was also not a sexual meeting.  The whole three years I was in the Army I had no sexual experiences.  I didn't dare.  Honestly, I wouldn't know what to do anyway, I was that backwards sexually.  


I didn't dare because the Army Security Agency and NSA had ongoing witch hunts for gays and lesbians.  During my two and a half years I saw many of my fellow soldiers lose their clearances and were less than honorable discharged from the Army, their future lives permanently affected.  One didn't have to even engage in sexual activity to lose one's clearance.  If you were accused of being gay, you had to prove you weren't.  If  you couldn't, you lost your clearance and were discharged.  I lived under that Damocles' Sword for two and a half years. 


I liked the Army.  I had a good job.  I liked the regimen and the fact that everyone was treated equally according to willingness to work hard and skills.  There was no class distinctions as there was in civilian life.  I did well in my job.  I had attained the rank of Specialist 5th class (equivalent of staff sergeant).  I was a soldier of the month.  I was an assistant barracks leader with my own room which I loved.  I was paid well.  I wanted to make a career out of the Army.  Since I couldn't afford to go to college, I thought the Army offered me the best opportunity in life.  But I knew in my heart I couldn't stay in the Army because sooner or later I would become sexually active and be found out.  I didn't want to live a lie for twenty years.   


I also liked my job at NSA.  I could have easily converted to civilian status with the same job and was in fact urged to do so.  But back then the United States government also had a policy that homosexuals could not have a security clearance.  I had a top secret security clearance which was the highest.  I made the decision that I didn't want to live a lie either in the Army or working for the government as a GS-14.  I also didn't want to risk imprisonment for lying that I was a homosexual.  Back then homosexuality was still against the law.  I was still a criminal.


So when my term of enlistment came to an end on January 27, 1963 I left the Army and my job at the National Security Agency.  


In all the years since I've often wondered how my life would have turned out if I wasn't a homosexual and could have made the Army a career or even working for the National Security Agency a career.  If I did I would probably be one of these rich Washington D.C. retired gays who now populated the Rehoboth Beach social scene.  These are the guys who can afford these expensive Rehoboth Beach restaurants.  But no, it was not to be.  I left the Army and my days of working at NSA behind me and began a new life in Pittsburgh, PA.  


Back seventeen years ago when Bill Clinton ran on the promise to open the armed services to gays and lesbians I felt like a wrong had been righted.  Thus I was very disappointed when he caved into the reactionaries and signed the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" law. One of the most odious and discriminatory laws ever passed in this country.  "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" ranks right up there with the Dred Scott Decision in my opinion of blatant legitimized discrimination fueled by fear of the unknown.


This year I had all but given up hope on President Obama and Congress.  Obama promised to end "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" but he seemed to be dragging his feet.  This looked like just another empty campaign promise.  But, much to my surprise and happiness, the Senate finally passed a law to repeal "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."  


At 69 years of age, I am at the end of my life now.  The practical effect of the repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" wont' affect my everyday life.  However, out there is another young man like I was 51 years ago.  A young man (or woman) who wants to serve their country and who want the opportunity for a better life that the armed forces provide.  A young man (or woman) who will not now be denied that opportunity just because of who they are.  That is the person I rejoice for on this wonderful day.  This history making day that a mighty wrong was finally righted.


Now if you will excuse me, I have 65 e-mails to send to senators who supported the repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."  Then I will send the president of the United States, Barrack Obama, a personal letter thanking him for keeping his campaign promise.  


Just watch, the whole country will benefit from this wonderful action today.  


I love living in this country, the United States of America.  For all it's flaws (and there are plenty), it is still the best place to live on this earth.  

Discipline

West Point Cadet Take the Oath 

Yesterday President Obama accepted General Stanley McChrystal's resignation.  General McChrystal offered his resignation as a result of the uproar over the Rolling Stone article about "The Runaway General" which showed McChrystal's disrespect for his commander in chief, President Obama.

McChrystal at an earlier meeting with Obama showing his obvious disdain for his commander in chief, President Obama

President Obama made the right decision in accepting McChrystal's resignation.  General McChrystal failed in the first and basic requirement of any member of the armed forces, discipline.  General McChrystal, by showing his contempt of President Obama and Obama's civilian staff, set an unacceptable tone for his staff and soldiers.  For our country to have a strong armed forces, there must be a seamless chain of command.  At the top of that chain of command is the president of the United States.  It doesn't matter whether you like or dislike the president, the president is the commander in chief.

McChrystal arrives at the White House yesterday

When I joined the Army on July 27, 1960 the first thing that I did was raise my right hand and take the oath to obey the commander in chief.  I am sure McChrystal also took the same oath early in his career when he entered West Point.  Where did he ever get the idea that he could ignore this oath?

McChrystal is well known for his discipline.  Reports say that he eats only one meal a day, runs seven miles a day and only sleeps four hours a night.  Impressive.  I couldn't do it.  But one thing I could do when I was in the Army was obey my commander in chief.  I also obeyed my platoon sergeant, first lieutenant, company commander, battalion commander, division commander, and whoever else was next in the chain of command all the way up to the president of the United States.  Was McChrystal's ego that outsized that he thought he was exempt from this most basic responsibility of a member of the armed forces?

Most of us at one time or another said things that we have regretted.  I certainly not exempt.  One of the reasons I decided not to make a career out of the Army was that I knew sooner or later I would have to report to somebody that I did not respect.  Even at that young age (21) I knew that if I was a private citizen and worked for somebody I didn't like or respect I could quit.  That's not an option for an enlisted man (or women) in the Army.  I didn't want to short circuit an Army career by having a run in with an officer that I despised.

Sure enough, in my civilian career I have encountered bosses who I did not respect.  On several jobs I quit rather than report to that kind of boss.  One time I made a mistake and didn't quit.  I was disrespectful (I spouted off one too many times) to a new boss I had at one of the banks where I worked. After a torturous few months of disciplinary actions, I was fired.  Yes, you read that right, I was fired.  It's not something I'm proud of.  I was called down to the bank president's office and told by the bank president that he could no longer tolerate the conflict between me and my superior.  I was then walked back to my desk (accompanied by my boss who I so despised) and told to clean out my desk and depart the bank immediately.  I was officially a non person.

Was I upset?  Not really.  In fact I was relieved to be done with the game playing of the documentation of my "poor performance."  Did I think the bank president make the right decision?  Absolutely.  I was disrespectful of my superior.  One incident specifically I angrily mouthed off to him (I call it "biting his head off") in full view and hearing of my co-workers.  That was the beginning the end for me.  In fact, he had every right to fire me on the spot.  The only reason I think he didn't fire me was that he wanted to make sure my replacement was in place before he did the necessary deed.

In my present job in which I only work part-time, I sometimes have issues with my boss, who is also the owner of the hotel.  Rather than let these issues simmer or discuss them with my co-workers, I have asked for a meeting with my boss to discuss them.  Airing my grievances in public is not an option, no matter how justified my complaints.  If my situation at work became so intolerable that I could no longer work for my boss, then my option is to quit.  I took that option with another bank job I had.  What is not an option is to air my grievances in public, thus showing disrespect and humiliating my boss.  That simply is not an option.

What constantly amazes me in life are people who show super human discipline in some areas of their life but in some basic areas, they show none.  Unfortunately for General McChrystal, his total lack of discipline for his oath to his commander in chief destroyed his whole career.

Think about it General McChrystal