My Character Flaw

Actually I have many character flaws but here is one that has dogged me my whole life.  It is very simple:

I CARE TOO MUCH FOR MY FRIENDS

Last night I woke up at about 2 a.m.  I couldn't get back to sleep.  I was upset.  What was I upset about?  I know I'll be mocked about this by some of my "friends" but here it is: 

I was upset about the blog that I wrote about just before I went to bed.  The blog was about my vow not to offer advice to friends anymore because they rarely if ever take it.  I vented in my blog posting which I probably shouldn't of done because I probably hurt the feelings of some of my friends (one in particular, and he knows who he is) and gave ammunition to other "friends" to further mock me for my naiveté.  

Many years ago a good friend told me "Ron, you're a nice guy.  You're intelligent, good-looking and have a good heart but you're terminally naive."  At first I didn't understand what he was saying.  I told Bill (my spouse) what my friend said.  Bill agreed with him.  I told other friends including my Mother.  They all agreed with him.  

Since that revelation about this facet of my personality I've tried to look at my life through that prism.  Sometimes I've been successful, most times not.  I keep falling into the trap of trying to help friends and people.  Usually the result is that I'm either taken for granted or not respected because I'm considered a fool.  There are some who are reading this blog right now (who I know personally) who are all too eager to point out again how naive I am even to be writing about this subject.  They take delight in telling me again how foolish and immature I am.  Those "friends" I have tried to distance myself from.  Sometimes I've been successful, sometimes not.  Usually when someone asks for help, I help.  I've been advised to say "No" sometimes.  I did that recently to a friend (former now) and I've never heard from them again,  so much for that "friend."  Again, proof of my naiveté.

I eventually did get back to sleep last night.  It wasn't a good sleep.  I wish I could be hard and callous but it is not in my character.  In the past I've been taken advantage of because of my naiveté.  Bill likes to call me "gullible."  He thinks it is an attractive trait that I have.  Maybe something good did come of my naiveté.  If I was your typical, opportunistic, selfish, grasping person I would probably be alone now in my life.  Instead I live with a person who loves me and I love him.  

So let me get through this hurdle and I'll probably return to my old gullible ways.  I'll just have to learn not to take things so personally.  I want to go back to my good night's of sleep.

The Fool on the Hill?

Tiger Woods - Just Another Hypocrite

Tiger Woods finally came out hiding yesterday and made a statement about the ongoing scandal that now defines him.




Tiger Woods, the ultimate control freak, made his statement with invitation only “guests” of friends and family, much like those screened audiences for those George W. Bush “town hall” meetings.



He robotically read his statement (obviously written by his highly paid public relations people) with cued pauses on certain passages for dramatic effect in which he would look at the camera and attempt to well up tears and generate sympathy for himself.




Personally, I don’t care what this man does in his private life. That is his business. That he is a serial adulterer wasn’t fair to his wife or his children but that is something for them to work out in private.



Where I have the problem is his hypocrisy. I’m not a golf fan and I’ve never watched Tiger Woods play golf. I couldn’t care less about golf or Tiger Woods. But where Tiger Woods does affect me is that I have been continually assaulted by his big teethed smile for the past 15 years as the “perfect man” that I should aspire to by ads on television and magazines. Unless you have lived on another planet for the past 15 years, there was no escaping the Tiger Woods ads.



Like most people, I don’t like ads. Sure, some of them are cute and even funny but generally ads are a price one has to pay in today’s society for the privilege of being entertained.


There are actors and actresses I don’t like. I have the option to not pay my money to see their films. There are politicians I don’t like (most of them actually.) I don’t vote for them. But with someone as ubiquitous as Tiger Woods has been for the past fifteen years, I didn’t have a choice. I have lost count of the many times I’ve flipped through pages of magazines and come across his odd looking features (he is odd looking isn’t he?) with that big toothy smile and ever present Nike baseball cap featuring him in some ad for which I would never buy that product.



I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve seen him in television commercials like the one for Oldsmobile autos (I know, I know, Oldsmobile autos have been discontinued.) How many other ads have I been subjected to by this odd looking man that I am supposed to use as a role model?



Now it turns out he’s a fraud. Gee, what a surprise. Tiger Woods is right up there with the Balloon Boy, John Edwards, Mark Sanford, Newt Gingrich, Bill Clinton, Sara Palin, and all those Republican politicians who voted against the stimulus package but who eagerly pose for pictures in their home districts next to giant checks from the government that benefit their home communities. These people are called hypocrites.



These people have no core values. These people are liars. These people are opportunists. These people are selfish. These people have no creditability. These people are frauds.



I may not have achieved what is defined as “success” in today’s rat race world. I may not be the sharpest knife in the drawer. I may not have been born with a natural talent. But one thing I am not is a hypocrite.



Tiger Woods doesn’t have a problem because he was a serial adulterer. Tiger Woods has a problem because he allowed himself to be promoted as a paragon of virtue and to be very handsomely paid to present that fraudulent picture of himself.



To me Tiger Woods is no different than Fab Morvan and Rob Pilatus, the two “singers” who were the Grammy award group Milli Vanilli. Fab and Rob were quite happy to accept the “Best New Artist of 1990.” That is until they were exposed as total frauds.



Like the curtain that was drawn back on the Wizard of Oz, Tiger Woods has been exposed as a total fraud that he is in reality.



Tiger Woods is a golfer. That’s what he should go back to. He can kiss “goodbye” those ads that have him walking on water because surely now it has been proven that Tiger Woods does not walk on water.



Goodbye Tiger. This grain of sand on the beach of life will not miss you.