Thanksgiving 2023

 

A Tipton Thanksgiving dinner about 1977 - from left to right - my Mother (partially obscured), my father, my sister-in-law and her husband Isaac, my brother who now lives alone (they're divorced and she remarried and lives in Florida) with his cat at the old family homestead in Pennsylvania

This year, as in year's past when I am asked "What are you doing for Thanksgiving?", I respond with "nothing." 

When my Mother was alive, I almost always went to her home (the old family homestead where my surviving brother, a MAGA Republican who I am not speaking to now....again, lives) for her traditional home cooked Thanksgiving dinner. As a matter of fact, that is how my parents met Bill for the first time.

I was estranged from them for about a year after they discovered I was gay. This was in 1964. My Mother caught me with my married boyfriend. Believe me, it was ugly. An incident which I've recounted many times in this blog as my longtime regular blog readers can attest to.

I think the year was 1965 that my Mother broke the ice when she sent me a birthday card (my birthday being November 9, conveniently a few weeks before Thanksgiving), and invited me to the family Thanksgiving dinner. I responded by telling her I would come but only if I could bring Bill. She said "Who is Bill?" I told her he was my boyfriend and I was living with him. She said "Absolutely not!" Then I told her "I'm not coming unless Bill comes with me." I can't remember the exact sequence of events but I think she called me back in a few days and said I could bring Bill. 

Well, you know the rest of the story. They LOVED Bill. As I knew they would. In fact Bill became very good friends with both my Mother (who was only four years older than Bill) and my father.

I don't know what my Mother was expecting. My father didn't much care, he never did about anything in my life. Maybe my Mother thought Bill would be very effeminate.  One thing Bill is not is effeminate. Bill is uber butch. For real. Or maybe she thought Bill was some kind of lecherous pervert. Well, I guess that all depends on the circumstance. Long story short, they had nothing to fear with Bill, all was well. And for many years Bill and I enjoyed Thanksgiving dinner with my parents. 

For a few years I tried giving a Thanksgiving dinner myself but Bill and I just don't eat that much to justify preparing all that food for the two of us. A few years we invited our late friend Ed C. over but that dropped off eventually. 

For another few years I attended my late friend Bob McC. and Jim D.'s annual Thanksgiving Dinner for Lonely Gay guys.

One of three tables laid out for Thanksgiving dinner at Bob and Jim's for the annual Lonely Gay Guys Thanksgiving Dinner

That was fun because most older, single gay guys don't have anywhere to go for Thanksgiving dinner. That's why Bob and Jim started up that annual Thanksgiving dinner event. And it was quite successful at one point having about twenty four gay men attending the Turkey Fest at their double wide mobile home on twenty-two acres of wooded land outside Georgetown, Delaware. 

One of the tables at Bob and Jim's Thanksgiving dinner

But of course, Thanksgiving at Bob and Jim's eventually withered away when most of the participants died, including Bob and Jim. No one has picked up the Thanksgiving baton since, including me.

Yep, that's me on the right leaning back in my chair

I must say I did so thoroughly enjoy those Thanksgiving dinners at Bob and Jim's. Food was great, company was fabulous. Only downside was occasionally one of those guys hit on me, thinking the dinner was a dating app. But this is the curse of being a hottie like I was then (Ron says with tongue in cheek). 

Thanksgiving dinner on the job at the hotel, often interrupted by a guest calling for fresh towels

When I wasn't attending other's Thanksgiving dinners I was working at the hotel. Here is a picture of me having a Pity Thanksgiving "Dinner" that one of my co-workers brought in to me when I was working at the hotel one year. Dinner was good. I do like turkey and all the fixings. What I do miss though is the camaraderie of "family" whether it be traditional or untraditional like a bunch of gay men who have nowhere else to go on Thanksgiving.

But then what is Thanksgiving about? Being thankful, that's what Thanksgiving is all about. And this year I am more thankful than I have ever been. And that is because I am here with Bill. I am so thankful that I can take care of Bill at this time of his life and that we can be together.

So my wish to you good folks is whatever kind of "family" gathering you have for Thanksgiving, you have a wonderful time and you have much to be thankful for.

Happy Thanksgiving!