Dermatologist Visit And Other Fun Experiences This Morning

Rehoboth Beach Walmart parking lot, yes, I used to feed the seal gulls.

This is the same Walmart where I hit the asphalt. Much more crowded though in June. This picture was taken in the winter, early in the morning. 

 Had to get up early this morning for my annual dermatologist visit. 

I've been making this visits for over thirty years now. I am paying the price for my youthful folly of "working on my tan" in the summertime. Oh if I could do those days over again. Oh well.

My physician's assistant had a field day burning off various keratosis spots all over my old worn out sagging body. 

As you know for the "full body check" I have to disrobe everything except my "boxer" shorts (who wears whitie tighties anymore?). The only thing I have to cover myself with is one of those flimsy hospital gowns that you can never quite close in the back. Very drafty those gowns and this one this morning was no exception. 

I used to apologize for my body when I'm exposed like this but these days I'm almost invisible to those who work in the medical establishment so I don't ever bother apologizing for the sad state of my body. Hey, at eighty-three year old, what can you expect? It's all sag, not much I can do about it although I have begun lifting ten pound barbells every morning to recover some muscle tone before I completely sag out.

So this is it for my doctor's appointments year. That is if I don't pass out in the Walmart parking lot again like I did this past June when Pat and Glenn were visiting. Thank God they were with me when I hit the asphalt as we were exiting the Rehoboth Walmart. Otherwise an exiting car would probably have backed out over me and all my worries and woes would have been solved then and there.

By the way, after my dermatologist visit I decided to go into the Rehoboth Walmart (since I was down that way anyway on Route One) and pick up a few items. Wouldn't it be just my luck to encounter a screaming little girl. Oh God how I had those screamers and this one was LOUD. Notice how they can stand still? Almost jumping up and down like a Mexican Jumping Bean. If they're not jumping they're running down the aisles. This screamer was two or three years old. In with her grandmother and mother. The grandmother kept saying "Now Shade". "Stay here Shade." Oh Shade."  Gee? Do you think the little screamer's name was .........SHADE? Oh how cute! It was obvious grandma wanted everyone in the store to know her little darling's name was SHADE.  

Walmart checkout!

I had to get away from that screamer before she elevated my blood pressure more that it was already. 

Wouldn't you know it they followed me on the same trajectory around the store and I was going? Even to the checkout! I'm always concerned that these little screamers run into my legs. Always happens. You know folks, I can see where kids are cute but you keep them. Okay? They drive me crazy. Boy, was I glad to get out of that store. In the past I've posted an episode like this to my You Tube account with a video. I don't do that anymore. The vitriol that rains down on me, unbelievable. Wow. "You miserable old man!" Yep, that's me, a "miserable old man." Guilty as charged.. I had to finally disable comments on my You Tube posts. In fact, I don't eve post those episodes to You Tube anymore. This is another reason I'm dreading my plane trip to and from Palm Springs. I just know I'm going to get one of those whiney kids on the planes. Doesn't bother Pat. Bothers me though. And when I don't get a whiney kid I'll get a hefty person with body odor. Oh yes, that's happened. You know I probably should have chosen a different career, a stand up comedian as a Miserable Old Man. 

I'm back home now. Looking forward to a nice quiet night and maybe I'll luck out and get a good movie or series on Netflix. Wish me luck!