Working Weekend

For those of you who follow this blog regularly, you'll notice there's been a blip in my usual daily posting.  That's because I worked the day shift at the hotel this weekend.  My regular hours are Wednesdays and Thursdays, 3 pm to 11 pm.  Occasionally I am asked to work for one (or two) of the regular full time front desk agents (we don't call them "hotel front desk CLERKS these days don't you know).  This weekend was one of those weekends.  

Wasn't so bad although I do have to get up before the birds (5 am) in order to get to work in time to set out the breakfast by 7:30 am.  Usually I like to sleep in until about 7 am or later.  But as I said, working this weekend wasn't so bad, helped a lot I'm sure by a hotel almost full of very pleasant guests.  

Our guests are usually retirees for a weekend getaway, or soon to be retirees looking to move to Delaware and the occasional newlyweds (which we had this weekend).  These folks are almost always pleasant, non-demanding and a pleasure to be of service to.  Plus, it helped that this weekend we had almost perfect weather.  Clear blue skies and a brisk bite in the air.  We could've used maybe ten degrees warmer but brisk air felt good.

My daffodils in full bloom today!

Bill misses me terribly when I'm gone from the house all day, even though when I am at our house I'm either on my computer, eating or taking a nap. At least I'm in the house which seems to give him some comfort.  I have to admit it is nice to be wanted and cared for and to care for someone.  

The only problem I have with working these irregular hours is that it throws off my digestive system (I get constipated because I can't go to the bathroom at work - yeah, I said it).  Other than that, and missing my daily blog entries, not a bad weekend of work at all.

Now I do it all over again in two weeks.  Then I work the night shift (3 pm to 11 pm) for my other full time co-worker.  Don't cry for me (Argentina) though, I'm taking off two weeks at the end of August to visit…….guess where?  Yep, Canada (read prior blog post for context).  

Time to watch more episodes of "The Good Wife" now (oh I am addicted to this show, it is SOOO GOOD).

Have a good night!

Coming Back To Life

Folks, I'm almost there!  OMG, did I ever get a good night's sleep last night.  These past three weeks seem like somebody else's life.  

Thursday night I went back to work for the first time in two weeks exactly.  I know because I didn't get a pay.  Yep, I timed my health drama exactly to coincide with my two week pay period. Well, at least that was neat.

So I go to work Thursday night, 3 to 11 pm.  Actually I went in an hour early because my co-worker had to leave early.  I went in at 2 pm and worked until 11 pm.  And wouldn't you know it the hotel had an "event."  This one was a wedding rehearsal dinner  Yep, a WEDDING REHEARSAL DINNER.  These straight folks really make a big deal about weddings don't they? And to think Bill and I took Jack and Judy D., our wedding witnesses to the Bay Leaf restaurant in Milton after we got married in Georgetown on July 3rd. And that was it for us folks.  No big deal with the grandparents and grandkids coming in form all parts of the country for THE BIG WEDDING.  But I digress.

My Wedding Party - yes, this was it - FOUR PEOPLE

So here I am, back at work, a little wobbly and light headed after a two week bout with kidney stones and the aftermath, and I have the wedding guest checking into the hotel.  Just between you and me folks, next to sports teams, the worst guests you want to have if you're working at a hotel are wedding groups.  They are a PAIN IN THE YOU KNOW WHAT.  But I'm digressing again.

The Horde coming into the hotel "Do you have a pool?"

So I get through the night only to have to go to work the next morning at 6:30 am.  Yep, that was a short night.  The daytime front desk clerks helps to set up the breakfast prior to the breakfast hostess coming in around 7 am to complete the set out for breakfast at 8 am.  Well, wouldn't you know it but the new breakfast hostess was delayed and didn't get in until 8:15 am.  Yep, that's right folks.....Ron did the WHOLE breakfast.  Of course  I wasn't surprised when I first unlocked the doors to the hotel at 6:30 am I had a guest waiting for me asking "When's the coffee going to be ready?" I said "Give me ten minutes" and I was off and running.  Oh yes, he was a wedding guest and there is a coffee maker in his room but still....no surprise this was a wedding guest after all.  Their main problem is that they want their hotel rooms and accommodations to be EXACTLY like their home.  Ain't going to happen but they try, the dears.  

Bridezilla

After the hostess came in, I could go back to my regular position looking pretty and helpful behind the front desk (which I do quite well thank you).  

The rest of the day went well but it was a long day.  Monica my relief came at quarter to three, and after updating her on the particulars (we do that at every shift change, hotel stuff), I skeedadeld out of there.  As soon as I got home and removed my hotel garb, I hit the sack for a solid hour and a half nap.

Passing the baton to the next shift

I got up, had a light dinner (no lunch, quite impossible when working a front desk at a hotel, it's an accomplishment that I can even go to the bathroom without someone calling or stopping at the front desk - nothing like pee interruptus to throw off your day).  And yes, I do wash my hands when I'm done (I know some of you were wondering).

After dinner I talked to Bill for a while (he hasn't seen much of me the past two days) and then I decided to go to bed early because I was still tired.  Man was I tired. 

I don't know what I did but I finally got to bed around 8:30 pm and only woke up about five times during the night to take a pee (I still have that stent in me).  When I finally got out of bed this morning at 6:05 am I felt SOOOO GOOD. God, for the first time in WEEKS I felt like a normal 71 year old gay white male (whatever that's supposed to feel like).  Man, so refreshed.  So this is what it's like to be ALIVE!  

So here I am, 10:24 am now, finally updating my blog with rambling thoughts (it's my blog, I can write want I want to - sung to the melody of Lesley Gore's "It's My Party").  

Know what folks?  Laying down felt so good, I'm going to do it again before I go to work this afternoon at 2:30.  And oh yes, the wedding guests are still there. Bring 'em on!  

Vacation Week

This was the week Bill and I were going to take our trip south to visit my ancestors' graves up there in the hillbilly mountains of western North Carolina.  However we decided last Friday (we were to pick up the van rental from Enterprise on Saturday) not to go.  We usually go in the spring, when the days are warmer and longer.  I thought it would be a good idea to go this year for the fall color in those glorious mountains.  But when we checked the weather (rain and showers) and knowing that the days would be shorter, we both decided to stay here at Casa Tipton-Kelly.  Well, I'm here to tell you I'm having a grand old time!

Even though I only work part-time (Monday and Tuesdays 3 to 11 pm) I'm still working.  Two of my days are taken, thus interrupting the smooth flow of JUST DOING NOTHING ALL WEEK.  And the past month or so I've had a series of doctors' appointments sprinkled in my weekdays also just to spice things up.

Don't get me wrong, I love my job at the hotel but it sure is nice to go a whole week without a guest asking me any or all of the following questions:

• "Where is the best place to eat?"-The Buttery
• "When is breakfast?" - 8 am to 10 am
• "Where do I park?" - outside where it says HOTEL PARKING
• "How much are your rooms?" - depends, what kind of room? They're all expensive
• "What are you rooms like?" - nice, what else do you expect me to say? Crappy?
• "Can I get an AAA and AARP discount at the same time?" - Uh....NO
• "How do I connect to the Internet?" - choose "Internet connection" duh
• "Can I have two more towels?" - gladly, I'll be up in a moment
• "I'm allergic to feather pillows, can I have a foam pillow?" - do you want the stained one?
• "Do you have a wine bottle opener?" - booze hound
• "Where is the ice machine?" - where it says "ICE MACHINE" to your right
• "How does the TV work?" - by remote control...hockey puck
• "Can I check in early?" - depends if previous occupant isn't checking out late
• "Can I check out late?" - usually asked by the same guest who asked to check in early
• "What time do you get off?" - 11, got something in mind?

No folks, I didn't miss THE QUESTIONS this week.  Oh don't worry, Dependable Ron will be back at the front desk, sincere smile and all ready to field the SAME questions with aplomb.

So where was I going with this posting?  Oh yes, talking about how much I'm enjoying my vacation this week.  I - AM - HAVING - A - BALL!  Yes folks, this is what freedom is all about.  

Back to the grind next week.  I wonder if anyone missed me?  

Why I Love Working a Hotel Front Desk Job

Ron in a bemused state - 1980

I wrote this last night while I was working the front desk at the hotel in Lewes, DE where I am gainfully employed.  Usually I write my blogs off the top of my head after I get up in the morning and have breakfast.  Occasionally I will write a blog post in the evening but that is rare.  I almost never write a blog post in the afternoon, that's when I take my nap.

I'm going to start something new.  When I'm working at the hotel, especially during a slow period (like the off season), I'll write a blog posting and save it to post later.  In the past I didn't like to post this way because I thought my postings would be stale and not up to date but I find that while working, many great ideas flow through my head that are gone the next morning.  So what I have decided to do (if I have the time) is write a quick blog entry during those down times and save it in my file for editing and posting later.

I believe I can still have fresh and spontaneous blog postings plus I will be able to expand my range of subjects and, hopefully, make my posts more interesting.

So here is my blog post from my experience last night at the hotel.  By the way, the picture at the top of the blog post probably won't have anything to do directly with the post, especially the ones at the hotel because I have to respect the privacy of the hotel guests.  But you know me, I simply cannot post without putting some kind of visual display and almost all of mine are of photos that I took myself.  The one at the top of this blog is one I discovered recently that was taken 31 years ago (yes, THAT long ago) when I used to visit my friend Big Bob at his Ranch (uh huh) outside of Georgetown, Delaware in the late 70's and early 80's.  It is of me in a pensive mood which is somewhat appropriate to this blog posting.

So here goes:


There are many reasons why I like working at a hotel front desk but the best reason is you just never know who you're going to meet or what situation is going to confront you. 


I know this unpredictability would drive some of my friends to a state of frazzled state of aphrehension but not me.  I love the challenge! 


Tonight is a good example.  We had guests check in last night.  Tonight the female half of the two guests wanted to surprise her boyfriend with a gift.  She asks me to make a reservation for the two of them at a local upscale eatery which I do.  Then she surreptiously slips a boxed gift (I saw the Mac apple on it) and asks me to get it to the restuarant and have it on the table when they arrive for dinnr. She sees her friend approaching and whisks away from me to join him at the elevator to go to their room.


I'm thinking "How am I GOING TO DO THAT?"  The logistics I mean.  I give the box to the cab driver who is driving them to the restaurant.  But won't the gentleman think it's odd when the cab driver goes into the restaurant WITH them?  Uh huh.  Think Ron, THINK! 


I call the restaurant and talk to "John" and tell him what I'm trying to do which is accomodate my guest in surprising her male companion with gift from Apple.  He states the obivous "How are we going to get the gift/package on the table without them seeing it?"  I DON'T know.  My mind is a blank.  Talk about challenges.  I asked for it didn't I?


The cab driver arrives at the hotel.  I give him the bag and tell him what I'm trying to do.  I tell him to give the bag to John.  The cab driver makes a suggestion.  He says "I'll let them out and wait until they go in and then I'll go in and give the bag to John."  Superb!  Ralph the Cabdriver figured out what this 70 year old head coudn't figure out.


After I hang the phone up I hear the bell of the elevator and her male friend steps out and heads towards me.  He asks me "Do you have tape?"  I do and I give it to him.  He heads off into the lobby with HIS package and the tape.  I see my opportunity and I call her in her room and tell her that the restaurant host will approach their table with The Package/Gift after they are seated.  Does this sound like it's getting complicated?  Talk about World Peace.  Hey, this is what makes the hospitality industry go 'round.


She says "Oh no, we're going to the bar first.  Just have the package placed on the table where we are to dine."  Viola!  Done! 


Her friend comes back to the front desk and asks for scissors.  I give them to him.  He returns to the lobby to finish wrapping his gift.


I tell Ralph the Cabdriver our Plan of Attack.  I call John at the restuarnt and tell him.  He's just a tad annoyed with all my phone calls but he graciously accedes to my request. 


Her friend returns the scissors and the tape to me at the front desk.  He takes the stairs to their room on the fourth floor of the hotel, thus giving me time to call her and confirm our Plan.


I call her and tell her.  She says "Great!"


Fifteen minutes later I hear the bell of the elevator go "RING!"  They both step out, she's dressed to The Nines and he doesn't look bad either with his black T-shirt outlining his well developed pectorals.  Hey, I am gay after all you know.


As they're headed out the door she turns on her 5 inch stilletoes and makes a circle with her thumb and forefinger and winks at me.  I give her the same sign back sans the wink (I'm not a winker). 


I just had a call from Ralph the Cabdriver.  He said they just went in the restaurant.  He asked me to tell John to come out and get the bag.  I call John again.  Actually I'm starting to feel like a Pain now. 


A woman answers the phone. Her name is Jen.  I decide not to both John again.  I think he's one of the cooks or otherwise disposed because he didn't sound real enthused the last phone call.  I tell Jen of my Plan.


I tell her that Ralph the Cabdriver is out in the parking lot waiting for someone to pick up The Bag.  I explain to her to take the package out of the bag and place it on the table while the couple is at the bar.  EXCITMENT!  SUSPENSE!  DRAMA!  SERENDIPITY!  (actually, I don't know if that last word fits this situation but I like the word).


Ralph just called!  He said a woman came out and picked up the bag.  I told him that I talked to a woman and it was alright.  Then I thanked him with a MISSION COMPLETED!


No I sit here at the hotel front desk with Christmas music playing in the background.  The hotel is empty, the only other guest having left earlier for dinner at another one of our fine local dining establishments.


I think this is a good time to mop the floor.  My reinforcement for a Job Well Done comes later when the guests return and thank me profusely for being such an oustanding conceriege.


That's what it's all about folks!  I create MAGIC!

Adventures in the Hospitality Business

The Hampton Inn Team 1999 (I am the second from the right in the back)

As regular readers of this blog know, I work part-time at a local boutique hotel.  Since retired from my chosen career in the banking business (manager, trust operations) I have worked in the hospitality business.  You ask "hospitality business, what is that?"  That my friends is that I am that person behind the front desk when you check into a hotel.

Me with Barbara and Bonnie, two New York City Jewish lesbians
See those smiles?  Guests don't get any tougher than these two ladies.
All my other front desk co-workers were scared to death of these two women.
Not me.  I bring out the smiles.  Not for nothing did I get the Best Guest Service Award (not that I'm bragging or anything I actually am because I am DAMN GOOD!)

In 1998 I began work as a part-time night auditor at the Hampton Inn in Lionville, Pennsylvania.  When I got out of the Army in 1963 my first job was a night auditor at the Pittsburgh Hilton Hotel.  After getting fired from my job at the Downingtown Bank (I was fired because I was an out gay man, a subject worthy of a book), I was collecting unemployment.  Bored with collecting unemployment and unable to find another trust operations banking job, I saw an ad for a weekend night auditor at the local Hampton Inn.  I applied and was hired immediately.  Then the Adventure began.

With my co-worker Angelo Vasquez at the Hampton Inn
We had a lot of fun working together (can you tell?)

I worked at the Hampton Inn for four years.  I eventually left the night auditor job (an awful job by the way) to full time at the front desk.  I was also an associate sales clerk which meant that I took the sales director's place on weekends because she didn't want to work weekend (she was a princess.)

Me, Mickey and my Aunt Mabel at Disney World April 2000

I was successful at my job eventually winning a Best Guest Service Representative Award and a trip to Disney World for two.  Yes, I actually could say "I'm going to Disney World!"

Me with the vice president of Hilton Hotels Corp at the Epcot Center, Disney World accepting my award as Best Guest Service Representative 2000 

During my four year run at the Hampton Inn I thought I encountered every situation there was possible as a front desk clerk. Little did I know.  One of my goals is to write a book (a la Dave Barry) about my experiences at the Hampton Inn.  That task is still on my back burner.

Me taking a load off of my feet at the Hampton Inn

I left the Hampton Inn in February 2001 and worked full-time for a local bank (in the trust department again).  For a short time I worked at the Marriott Residence Inn but left after a month because of the reason stated below.

In November of 2006 I sold our house in Pennsylvania and moved to Delaware for my retirement and to save what little money I had left after the Great Stock Market Rip-Off.  Three months after I got settled down I felt like I needed to get out.  So what did I do?  You got it, I looked for a hotel job.

I got my list of hotels and made the rounds and put in my application.  The last hotel (and the one nearest my home) hired me.  That hotel is where I have been working the past 3 1/2 years.

This morning I read a very funny blog posting by a good (and very talented writer) friend of mine about his past week's experience as a restaurant host in downtown Rehoboth.  I almost fell off my chair laughing reading of his encounters with the restaurant customers and the tourists (aka The Horde) who are replenishing our local coffers with their money this summer season. That brought to mind that I have similar experiences in my job as hotel front desk clerk.

I won't identify where I work to protect the innocent (and me) but here are just some of the questions I got in my job working the front desk:

• The phone rings and the question again is:  "Do you have any rooms this weekend?" 
• My answer is "No."  Then the next question is "Do you know anyone who has rooms?"
• Now this is a trick question because if I answer "Yes" they then ask "What are their rooms like?  Are they nice?"   
• Now, what do you think I'm going to say?  Lewes is a small town.  Do they really think I'm going to say "No, they're awful and I wouldn't send my worst enemy there!
• If I fall into the trap of saying their rooms are nice then they ask "How much are they? Do they have a pool?"  This last question "Do you have a pool?" drives me crazy.  If I had a quarter every time someone asked me "Do you have a pool?"  You know what that question means don't you?  That means they have kids and want to unload them in the pool, the little darlings. 
• Now, while I'm on the phone with this person who is too damn lazy to look up the hotel and call then directly, I have guests waiting to check in and the other line is ringing, probably from someone else wanting to know "Do you have rooms this weekend?"
• So what I do now is make the suggestion to the person on the phone that PERHAPS she (almost always it's a "she") call the hotel DIRECTLY.  Do you think?  
• The response I get to this suggestion is usually "Oh.......Okay."  Sometimes I get "Can't you tell me?"  I explain to them that I have guests I have to checkin MY hotel and I have another line ringing.  This explanation never is satisfactory to the person on the other end of the line.  After all, it is ALL ABOUT THEM.

Now, this is just one "experience" as a hotel front desk clerk at the height of the summer season at a seaside resort.  And mind you, I work in a small, laid back town.  I don't work in Crazy Town (aka Rehoboth Beach) where there are true horror stories that would dwarf my little frustrations at the front desk.  

Every day I go to work I never know what to expect.  What truly surprises me is the new questions that I've never had to answer before and the response when I don't have the answer.  For instance last week a man (not a guest of the hotel) came into the front desk.  He wanted to know where the office was to the condo complex that is located next to the hotel.  I told him I didn't know (I found out later there is none).  He wasn't satisfied with that answer.  He then asked "How much do those condos cost?"  I told him I didn't know.  With a disgusted smirk on his face  he then said "Why don't you know?  You work right next to 

them?" Now understand I work mightily not to be one of those smart assed guys who work in the customer service business.  But, I admit sometimes it is very hard to remain professional especially when confronted by an arrogant bastard gentleman like this.  I answer "No sir, I don't know."  Of course this isn't the answer he wants to hear so then he asks "Well, do you know WHO DOES KNOW?"  Hey, how about the Lewes Realty Association?  I give him that advice which is none to happy to receive because he wants an answer NOW.    

Believe it nor not that that wasn't the first time I got that question.  So I made it my business to find out if there was an office and how much those condos cost.  I found out.  There is NO OFFICE and the condos cost A MILLION DOLLARS ON AVERAGE!  Also there is NO TURNOVER unless one of the occupants dies.  So the next time I got the question I gave this answer. You should have seen the look on his face.  I LOVED IT!  

So there are just a couple of the fun things that happen at the front desk at the delightful local boutique hotel where I work part-time.  One thing I want to make clear though, most of the guests and the folks I encounter every day are pleasant, polite and respectful folks.  It's that 1% that are rude, disrespectful and ignorant  But you know what? I see them as a challenge which I welcome.  I love my job, there is always something unexpected.  Keeps me on my toes.  Keeps me alive.

Me today, ready for business

A Touch of Fall

Yesterday morning Bill and I headed out to Rehoboth Beach and Zorba's Restaurant for our usual weekly breakfast. The food at Zorba's is mediocre at best but the layout of the restaurant is comfortable (a lot of booths)and  the services good and also gay friendly. Yesterday morning we both ordered a short stack of buttermilk pancakes. I have to say they were heavenly. I brought along my own authentic 100% maple syrup. I try to keep my consumption of all those high fructose corn syrup concoctions down to a minimum and who knows what's in that pancake syrup they serve at Zorba's.  My stomach is too tempermental at this stage of my life for me to take a chance on the unknown substance they call "maple syrup" in the sticky container the waitress placed on our formica topped table.




As we sat in the restaurant sipping our coffees (mine decaf and Bill's full blast caffeinated), I watched the traffic out on Route 1. The amount of cars and SUV's with bicycles piggybacked on the rear bumpers was less than usual. The summertime traffic is winding down. I didn't see the steady stream of traffic that I've been seeing all summer from my weekly breakfast perch at Zorba's. Thank goodness. While we locals all appreciate the business that the tourists bring to the beach areas of southern Delaware, we're not sad to see them go at the end of the season. We locals stay out of Rehoboth Beach in the summertime because of the crowds and gridlocked roads. I've seen that movie.  I don't want to see it again.


A sure sign that the summer season is coming to an end is my friend Cajun inviting me to join him for a drink and chat at the Feathered One (aka The Purple Parrot in Rehoboth Beach) this Sunday evening at 5:30 pm. We will renew our almost weekly get together of local friends for Happy Hour cocktails, chat and good eating in the heart of Rehoboth Beach, sans the tourists. Ah yes, I am looking forward to seeing old friends again and catching up on all the gossip of the past summer (sorry about that Harvey.)



Another sign that the summer season is coming to an end is that the onslaught of moms and dads at the hotel where I work has slacked off. Those kiddies are back in school! Last weekend was a trip and a half contending with screaming kids running to and from the breakfast room past the front desk where I am perched. Ever notice how the Little Darlings can't walk? They run. Where do they get all that energy? Wouldn't I love to have some? Did I have that kind of energy when I was a Little Darling? I don't think so because I was never a Little Darling. At least that's what my dad told me. He had another name for me, Shut Up! I didn't dare run anywhere or else I would have his big paw slamming down on my backside. But then that was another time and a different mindset.



Tomorrow I have my annual dermatology appointment at the VA Medical Center in Wilmington. That means I have to get up way to early (4:30 am) to catch the American Legion Post 28 van at 6 am for my ride to the VA. The van should get me back home around 12 noon then I have to get ready for my afternoon shift at the hotel. Then I'm off the rest of the week until the weekend. I'm working this weekend for my co-worker Monica. Her son is in Iraq and he is returning for a week's leave and she wants to spend time with him. He is a wonderful young man who generously volunteered for duty in Iraq and I will make sure to let him know how much I appreciate his effort on behalf of our country. I honor and respect all those of our best and brightest over there in Irag and Afghanistan in the service of our country.



Next Monday I have another appointment at the VA Medical Center. This one is to go over my "labs" that I took at the Georgetown VA Outpatient center. I refused to go back to the Georgetown facility because they can't keep a doctor or even a nurse practitioner to consult with me. I hate to say it but the Georgetown facility isn't doing us vets down here in southern Delaware much good. They can't even keep a doctor on premise. It's a facility in name only. I'm looking forward to seeing my previous doctor in the Wilmington VA. I felt I was in very good hands the first and only time I met with her over a year ago before I was relocated to the Georgetown VA clinic.


Next month my hours will go down to one day a week at the hotel. While the pay I receive won't do much to help with my mortgage payments, I will value the extra time I have off from work. During this past summer and spring I put a lot on the back burner while I did yard work outside. Now that the birds are gone and the planting season is coming to an end, I can get back to updating my genealogy family tree and other chores like unpacking boxes I still have from my move down here in November of 2006. Yes Virginia, I still have unpacked boxes from my move. Don't tell anyone.

Full Moon Day

Five o’clock rolled around early this morning. I had to be in work by 7 am to open up the hotel on this Labor Day weekend. Looking out my Wall of Windows in my great room I saw a full moon hanging in the sky. That portended the day to follow.




First thing I do on the way to work on the morning shift is to stop at the Food Lion in Five Points to pick up the morning papers to place in the hotel’s breakfast room. At this early in the morning, everyone is moving slow, including yours truly. At quarter to seven I burst through the doors to Food Lion looking for the papers. No papers. Right behind me is a rough looking gal delivering the papers. I quickly grab the papers I need and I’m off to work. I arrive shortly before 7 am, clock in and immediately encounter a Needy Guest.



Now my job at the hotel is the front desk clerk. I check guests in the hotel, I take reservations, I answer questions like which restaurant serves the best crab cakes, where can they rent bicycles and other many and varied questions. That’s my job. That’s what they pay me to do. But, as all hotel front desk clerks know, there are those guests who find it impossible to pass the front desk without asking a multitude of questions and requesting special treatment. These guests are called Needy Guests. Well, we had one this morning. Oh Mother of God did we have one this morning, afternoon, and all day long. “How do you get to the beach?” “Can I walk to the beach?” “Do you have towels?” “Do you have a bag for the towels?” “Where is the library?” “How do I get to the library?” “Can I feed my child in the breakfast room?” The questions continued on and on ad infinitum. If it sounds like I’m complaining, well I am. This woman wore me out. Oh yes, the biggie was could I wash her baby bottles and have them ready at 12 pm in time before her little darling’s nap. Oh yes, that’s what we specialize in at the hotel, using our dishwasher to wash baby bottles.



Well, enough about her. Another guest comes to the front desk and tells me he’s not happy with his room. He says he doesn’t have a balcony. I check his reservation and find that his wife made the reservation over the Internet. He tells me he feels claustrophobic and “can’t breath” because he doesn’t have a balcony and asks me if I could move him to another room. I tell him I cannot because we are sold out. He asked me again if I could “do something.” He tells me that he wasn’t told that his room (actually a very nice suite with a sun room) didn’t have a balcony. Mind you, his wife made the reservation herself over the Internet. On our website if the room doesn’t have a balcony we don’t say “Room doesn’t have a balcony.” He isn’t happy with this explanation and says to me “Would you rent a room without a balcony?” Uh, actually I have. In fact I think every room I have ever rented in my life did not have a balcony. But I could tell what he was trying to do my challenging me with his confrontational questions. He was trying to make me defensive.  He wanted to make HIS mistake MY mistake. I wasn’t going to permit that to happen. Even though my main adult business career was trust operations, since 1994 I’ve worked part time as a hotel front desk clerk. I’ve seen this movie before. I know how this game works and I wasn’t going to be drawn into it. I told him he could sit on the Waterview Room deck which faces the canal. He still wasn’t smiling but he realized that I wasn’t going to pull a private room for him out of you know where that had a balcony.



The rest of the morning continued in a similar vein. My manager said “There must be a full moon with all the weirdness.” I confirmed to him that yes, indeed there was a full moon. I was so glad when 3 o’clock rolled around and my shift came to an end and I turned over the reins of The Full Moon Inn to my relief, Monica. I just got off the phone with Monica. As the readers of this blog probably surmised by now, the weirdness continues. She related to me some truly strange tales that happened since I left this afternoon including that same guest who felt “claustrophobic” in his room. He spilled a can of soda on his bed, expensive comforter and all. Nice. Thank goodness Monica was able to get the comforter in the washer before the soda dried and she was able to remove the stain. She has about four hours to go before her shift ends. I don’t go in again until Monday afternoon at 3 PM. By then all the guests will be gone.



Oh, one big fact I left out. There were at least 14 kids under 5 years of age that went into our breakfast room this morning. And these little darlings didn’t walk quietly either. They ran screaming, both ways. Later on one of the guests brought down a bag of “trash” for me to dispose of. Yes, you guess it. The bag of “trash” was a bag of dirty diapers. Ah yes, all those years of night school to get my college degree and all those years of Mr. Big Shot Operations Manager in the Trust Department and here I am today disposing of a bag of s..t. I’m good.

Brush with Celebrity

Every once in a while, in my corner of the world, wherever that happens to be, I occasionally meet a famous person. My latest brush with celebrity was Saturday morning at my job as a front desk clerk at a small boutique hotel in Lewes, Delaware. I cannot mention the name of this famous person out of respect for his privacy and my position at the hotel but I can say he is a very well known person. I’ve seen him on TV for the past twenty years or so and have always admired him and his candid, straightforward way of explaining the issues in the field in which he is a recognized expert. He is also in charge of a large government agency which has a budget of billions of dollars.

I haven’t met or encountered that many celebrities in my lifetime but I have found the encounters to be very interesting. I have a chance to see what they’re really like. The famous person I met this weekend was a very pleasant, unassuming, down to earth man who, if you didn’t know who he was, you would never suspect he is a world renowned figure in his field. I was very impressed by him and his family. They all seemed so normal. What really impressed me was every time he went by the front desk, he always said “Hi!” to me like he really meant it. I think he did. That’s more than I can say for many of the guests of the hotel. To most of them I'm the automaton behind the front desk who dispenses the keys to their room, tells them how to get to the beach and advises them of the best place to get a crabcake.

In the two and half years I’ve worked at this hotel, I’ve had the occasion to make reservation for important people. Almost always someone else, usually their assistant or travel agent makes the reservation. They always make it clear that they want the best room because they have a very important client. Not so this gentleman. In fact, the two rooms he rented weren’t two of the best rooms (of course all of the 22 rooms and 2 VIP suites at the hotel where I work are great.) They were on the second floor, with a partially blocked view of the canal. Almost all of our guests want the room with the best view of the water. This guest made the reservation himself. He came in with his family. Neither he nor his family demanded special treatment. They were just a pleasant as anyone could be. What a delight.

Coincidentally, on Saturday I also took a reservation for another famous person. He is an author whose book I have. His wife made the reservation under his name. When she spelled out his name I told her “I think I know who your husband is.” I mentioned the book he had written and the fact that he is often on MSNBC (which I watch all the time) and she said “You’re right, that is my husband.” He is checking in tomorrow night when I’m on shift again so I will meet my second celebrity in less than a week. I can’t wait to see what he’s really like. Boy I love my job!

Mother's Day 2009

The sun shines brightly this Sunday morning, Mother's Day 2009. The heat and humidity of yesterday is gone, replaced by low humidity and a brisk wind.

The first thing I did this morning after getting up from bed was to go out to my Purple Martin house and tear out yet another house sparrow nest. I've been tearing out their nests for about 10 days now. The Purple Martins arrived on schedule, May 1st. They took up residence in the other five apartments but the determined house sparrows will not give up on their nest building in the one apartment. After I cleaned out their messy nest and was walking back to the house, I noticed that both of the sparrows were having sex (or else they were playing leap frog) on the ledge in front of their desired apartment. I took this as their version of giving me the Universal Finger (aka as the Digital Salute.) I may have to escalate this battle of wits and wait until they lay their eggs and then throw out the whole batch; nest, eggs and all. I would like to throw out the sparrows too if I could ever catch them.

Last night I worked late at the hotel. I had a caller on the phone who originally called about the availabity of accomodations for herself and her pet but the conversation quickly went off into another whole direction about her visit to a dog breeder that day and how she said she was "misled" as to the quality of the pups she viewed. She said the puppies looked like they were "shot out of a cannon." I didn't get the connection between this room availability until she said she didn't want "any surprises" if she rented our pet room. In other words, an ironclad guarantee that she would be completely satisfied with her stay and accommodations. I patiently listened to her and stated our accommodations and amenities but did not give her the ironclad guarantee that she obviously wanted. I have found from past experience that callers who go on long tangents on the phone never make the reservation. Maybe they're lonely and just want someone to talk to. This is one of the things I like about my job as a hotel front desk clerk, observing human nature. After awhile most of them fall into certain categories. This one falls into the Twilight Zone. Beep, beep, dit, dit, dah dit.

After checking my Facebook account this morning, I made a call to my Mother to wish her a happy Mother's Day. Again, no one answered the phone. I left a message on her answering machine. I don't know why I do that because she doesn't check her answering machine. I had planned to take the 2 1/2 drive up to Pennsylvania to visit her today but I agreed to work for my co-worker who was regularly scheduled to work this weekend. I'm only supposed to work Monday evenings 3 to 11 PM but I've been work all kinds of hours the past few weeks and will continue to do so until next month. Her son is leaving for Iraq next week and she wanted to spend as much time with him as she could before he ships out.

Next Tuesday I'm filling in for another co-worker who is going on vacation to Ireland. Next Friday I'm filling in for another co-worker who has a court date. I'm glad to have the extra hours (helps to pay the mortgage) but with this kind of schedule it's hard to take a few days to visit my Mother. I also want to visit my Aunt Mabel who is recovering from an operation. I also have to return some family history records to my cousin Elsie Mae. And, just this week I received an invitation to attend a family reunion to be held this August at Nottingham Park in Oxford, PA. Lots on my schedule. Never a dull moment.

I just finished talking on the phone to my longtime friend Ed from my high school days in Pennsylvania. He has a second home in Rehoboth Beach. It seems every time he comes down to visit, I'm working that weekend. Hopefully I can see him on Memorial Day weekend. As of now, I have Saturday and Sunday off that weekend. Maybe by then the house sparrows will have given up on building their nest in my Purple Martin house. That's one battle I'm going to win.

Cold Tuesday

Last night was another slow night at the hotel where I work the front desk from 3 to 11, Mondays and Thursdays. There were only three guests in the hotel; a confused elderly couple from New York and a Dutch national who is working at the Georgetown airport. With only two rooms rented, last night was a long night. I almost wished for those nights when the hotel had a stedy flow of guests in and out and asking the same questions at the front desk such as:

“Where do I park?” – outside in the parking lot
“Where is the best place to eat?” – The Buttery, The Second Street Grill, Stripper Bites, Cafe Azafran, Beseme, Jerry's Seafood...take your pick
“How far to the ocean?” one mile to the bay – the Atlantic Ocean is at Cape Henlopen, drive east until you hit the water....you're there.
“How do I get there?” out the front door to the light, over the canal street bridge one mile
“Is there parking?” yes, at the end of the road where the beach meets the water
“How much?” I don’t know, they keep raising it - take a lot of quarters

"What is my room number?" the number is on your key, that's not a decoration
“How do I get to my room?” – the elevator behind you
“Where is the elevator?” - turn around, it is behind you
“Where is the ice machine?” - turn around and to your left where it says "Ice" on the door
“Do you have a soda machine?” Yes
“Where is your soda machine” Opposite the front desk where you’re standing where it says "Soda" on the door
“How do I get to The Buttery?” Out the front door to the right one block then left - they have a big sign that says "The Buttery" - you can't miss it
“How far to The Buttery?” one and a half blocks

"How do I get there?" walk, put one leg in front the other and before you know it, you're there

"How is the food?" Gawd awful. What do you expect me to say? It's good (and expensive)
“What time is checkout?” 11 AM
“Can I have a late checkout?” No

"Why can't I have a late checkout?" because we have to have time to clean the rooms for the next guest who wants an early check in like you did when you made your reservation
“Why is that siren going off?” It is the fire alarm for the local fire company
“Do you have tornadoes in this area?” No, we’re not in Kansas...... anymore .....Toto
“Who has the best crab cakes?” Gilligan’s (so they tell me)
“How long has this building been here?” I don’t know, ask the owner
“What time is breakfast?” 8 to 10
“How do I get to the Cape May-Lewes Ferry?” out the front door to the light then left to the Dairy Queen then a right one mile and the Ferry is on your left – YOU CAN’T MISS IT – THEY HAVE BIG SIGNS

Oh how I miss those days with the helpless guests. The owner of the hotel told me he witnessed the phenomenon of otherwise intelligent people who are struck dumb upon entering the hotel and become helpless. But then that’s why I’m behind the front desk. I’m there to help them. I don't get paid the big bucks for looking pretty. However, there are times I must admit when my patience runs short after answering the same inane questions over and over again. It is almost like there could be a robot behind the front desk programmed with the same answers. All the guests would have to do is push the appropriate button. Sort of like those menus we all have had to navigate when making a phone call to a business. Speaking of which......................................

Yesterday I had such an experience. I called E*Trade to find out how to make a deposit to my IRA account as of last year. Upon doing my taxes I discovered I owed $638. Apparently I missed the fabulous Bush tax cuts (probably because I’m not in the 35% tax range – I’m in the 15% tax range and, as all of you who are in that range know, we received NADA tax cuts during the Bush Reign of Terror.) To avoid paying $638 in taxes this year, I could make a retroactive contribution to my IRA account, thus delaying paying taxes on my meager income this year to a future year in which I may not have a job and will need the money. I realize that last sentence was a long one but you get the idea. I’m trying to hang onto as much of my money as I can in my twilight years. Everything is going up except my income and my libido. Anyway, back to my experience calling E*Trade. It took me several calls and about 15 minutes plowing through telephone menus before I got a live person to ask how I make a contribution on line. He told me to go into the E*Trade web site and click the box that said Transfer. He then told me to indicate where I wanted the funds to come from (my bank account in Downingtown) and which one of my E*Trade accounts I wanted credited. Then he told me to check either the 2008 or 2009 IRA contribution box. Well, that was easy enough. Actually, I think I made this process a lot harder that it really was. In fact, I think I was the Customer Who Was Struck Dumb. I imagine the E*Trade customer service representative I talked to yesterday has his own list of customers who ask the SAME QUESTIONS. Hmmmm….something sounds familiar here.