Retired in Delaware: Mother's Day

Showing posts with label Mother's Day. Show all posts

Sunday, May 10, 2020

Mother's Day 2020

Me with the Best Mom in the World, a fashion plate she was not. She gave every thing she had to "her boys", me and my two brothers

Yes, I had one of those Best Mother's In The World. My brothers and I were so lucky to have her as our mother. Something we took for granted growing up.

We didn't realize how lucky we were until we left home and discovered that some of our friends and acquaintances weren't so lucky. I remember the first time someone told me he didn't get along with his mother, I couldn't process it. I just assumed everyone had a mother like me and my brothers. Now my father, that's a whole different story.

So today I wish my Mother a very happy Mother's Day. Even though she's been gone ten years now (how fast time goes by), there is hardly a week that goes by that I don't think of her, have the impulse to call her and share some bit of news with her or just to complain.

Mom and me later years

My Mother lost her before just before her second birthday, I always thought that's why she put so much into raising me and my brothers the right way. Now don't get the wrong idea, she didn't spoil us, oh no, not by a long shot. But she did teach us to be responsible, truthful, honest, and respectful. Oh sure, she wasn't perfect. Today she would be a Trumper. At the end of her life she was addicted to Fox News. How ironic because her whole life she was a registered Democrat and for most of my life I was a registered Republican and yet we had opposite political views. These days you all know how I feel about the Orange Faced Criminal in the White House.

Not to end this posting on a down note, which too often seems to happen when I reference the sorry state of affairs of our country now, today was a beautiful, sunny Sunday. Just the kind of day I would take that two and a half hour ride to her modest home in the suburbs of Philadelphia to wish her a "Happy Mother's Day" in person.

Me and Mom 1979

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Happy Mother's Day . . . . . .

Mom, me and my two younger brothers - 1951 Compass, PA

Every year now when I hear the Mothers' Day advertisements I think "Not for me this year."

My Mom died five years ago. Five years, seems like only a few months ago.

I was one of the lucky ones, I had the best Mom in the world (for me). So much I could say about my Mom but I'll let just some of the hundreds of photos I took of her during her 86 years of life speak for themselves.

Betty Hadfield - 1940 - high school senior

Mom and me - Mineral Springs, PA - 1942

Mom and me - my "Droopy Drawers" photo - 1942

Mom and me Kerr Park Downingtown PA 1948

Mom and her new fur (fake) coat Washington Ave, Downingtown, PA - 1950

Mom at our Boot Road house - 1958

Pop and Mom at East Brandywine home - 1963

Pop, Mom and me - East Brandywine, PA - 1975

Mom at her favorite spot overlooking her garden East Brandywine - 2000

Me and Mom in her garden - 2000

Me and Mom - 2002

Mom's new haircut - 2004

Mom - J.C. Penney official portrait - 2005

Me and Mom at Pop's headstone at Hopewell Methodist Church Cemetery - 2005

Mom with Easter flowers from her son John

Mom and me with her leopard vest (which she loved fashion statement be damned)

Mom with her "bedwarmer" Molly (aka "Miss Martha") - 2006

Mom and "Miss Martha" taking a nap - 2006

Me giving my Mom a hug - she was never a hugger as you can tell from her body English

Me helping Mom back into her house - 2006

Mom with my younger brother John, whose family with whom she lived and took wonderful care of her during her declining years in South Carolina - 2009

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Mother's Day 2013

Mom at her favorite spot in her garden, at the end of the day

My Mom died in 2010. This is the third year that I will not send her a Mother's Day card. Oh sure, I know "holidays" like Mother's Day are over commercialized but my Mother did like to receive a Mother's Day card.

Mom (far left) with her two older brothers George (center) and Randall (right) She told me that later her brothers tore the head off of her doll. This is the only picture of have of my Mom as a little girl. It was taken around 1927

I honored my Mother every day of the year. Whenever I saw something that I thought she would like, I bought it for her. I didn't have to wait for a holiday. For you see, I was one of those lucky kids who had a great Mom.

Mom holding her half sister Ruthie on her shoulder- this is the only picture I have of my Mom when she was about 14 years old -1 937

Oh sure, towards the end of her life, when she started to slip into dementia, things got difficult. The last year or so of her life she was very angry with me. I think her anger had a lot to do with the fact that I moved from Pennsylvania to Delaware, thus leaving her. She felt the same way when my younger brother John moved to South Carolina with his wife over thirty years ago. However, we didn't "leave" her. She was living with our other brother Isaac. For you see, "her boys" (as she always used to call us), had all the bases covered.

Mom as a high school sophomore - 1939

I had a room for her at our house here in Delaware. She lived with Isaac at her home of over fifty years in Pennsylvania until he could no longer care for her. That when we tricked her into moving to South Carolina with brother John, who is a care pastor and had the facilities in his home to better accommodate our increasingly frail mother. Plus, John had two women (his wife and daughter) who could better attend to our Mom's "woman's needs" than Isaac or Bill and I could.

Mom's graduation picture 1940 - she never graduated - she got married when she was 16 years old had me

My brothers Isaac and John and I promised our Mother that we would never put her in a nursing home. I have to admit that the last couple months of her life became increasingly difficult for John and his wife Barbara to care for Mom. She was very demanding and difficult (as a result of her dementia). But then she had her good days which made all the difficult days fade.

Mom, me and Pop - 1941

I am so proud that we were able to keep our promise to our Mom. Although she did want to spend her last years at her longtime home in Pennsylvania, my brothers and I were able to provide her with the personalized care that she so loved and appreciated.

Mom and me - 1941 - humble beginnings but happy

There is a rarely a day that goes by that I don't think of my Mother. We were best friends. I discussed everything with her. When she died I felt like part of me died. In fact, part of me did die. She was always there for me. For sixty-eight years I had the comfort and security of knowing that my Mother was never more than a phone call away, ready to listen to my latest drama.

Guess who makes their arrival in November 1941? Yep, it's me!

My Mom loved me like no one else has ever done. Bill comes a close second but no one, and I mean no one loved me like my Mom. And I in turn can never love a woman like I loved my Mom.

I was a Happy Baby (so says my Mother) - 1942

When I was younger and confused about my sexuality I often thought it had to do with my close relationship with my Mother. I could never imagine anything other than a loving (platonic) and respectful relationship with any other woman other than my Mother. Any other kind of relationship (carnal) with a woman repealed me (no offense to my present women friends). I still feel the same way today.

No mistaking who the Mama's boy was - that's me leaning on my Mom while my two younger brothers are trying to figure out that toy typewriter - 1950

I have many photos of my Mom. Yesterday I pulled some out to represent my relationship with her over the years. Some of these photos I have posted before in this blog. Perhaps I'm posting too many this time. But you know what? It gives me a good feeling to honor my Mom this way on her special day. I'm sorry Mom that I couldn't send you a Mother's Day card this year but here is my annual tribute to you Mom. As I said earlier in this posting, I was one of the lucky kids. I had a great Mom.