Leaving Pennsylvania

Early tomorrow I leave Pennsylvania. My four days at my Mom's house in Pennsylvania has been very productive. I spent quality time with my Mother and brother. Since my move to Delaware in November of 2006, all of my visits to Pennsylvania were made the same day. This wasn't fair to my Mother. This visit I changed that scenario. I stayed for four days. I think she's had enough of me now. The next time I visit, I'll probably stay overnight but just for one night. Four nights is too much. I don't know how our whole family lived in this 1,100 square foot one bathroom, ranch house back in the late Fifties. It is so small. I've been spoiled with my 4,200 square foot house in Delaware with four bathrooms. I am looking forward to going home tomorrow and walking around a house where my elbows don't bump into the walls.

Earlier this morning I visited my Aunt Mable and her son, my cousin Bud (same age as me.) It was a good visit. Bud and I discussed the state of the economy. Aunt Mabel asked about my Mom. They used to work together on "the line" in the frozen foods division of Pepperridge Farm in Downingtown. Yes, they were the Ethel and Lucy of the frozen cake line. They have many funny stories to tell about the time the line was speeded up. Cakes falling off the line. Aunt Mabel and my Mom have many funny stories to tell of their experiences "on the line."

Before I left, Mabel and Bud loaned me some of their old precious family photos. Oh how I love to borrow these old family photos and scan them into my computer so I can post them to the Tipton Family Tree on Ancestry.com. This is perhaps my favorite pastime in my retirement years. Whenever I visit relatives I try not to leave without borrowing at least a few of these priceless family photos. Very little gives me greater pleasure than to see those faces out of the past. So long ago and such a different time.

Whenever I visit Pennsylvania I try to have at least one lunch at the Brickside Grill so I can order their version of Chicken Quesadilla. No one, and I mean NO ONE makes a Chicken Quesadilla like the Brickside Grill. Today I had lunch with my former classmate Judy and her son Ben. Ben ordered calamari. I have never eaten calamari. I tried some today. Just as I suspected it tasted like a breaded fishy rubber band. For the life of me and I cannot fathom why anyone would eat THAT. But, now at least I can say I ate calamari.

Back home, I got onto my new Facebook account. I had signed up to Facebook a few years ago but never really got into it. A couple friends asked why I wasn't on Facebook. Well, I took their advice and now see what I was missing. I had thought I was too old for Facebook. Now I find out that Facebook is for anybody. It brings e-mailing to a whole new level. In fact, it makes the old way of e-mailing seem quaint. I was also hesitant because I didn't think I would have any friends. Much to my surprise, many of my friends....my OLD friends are already on Facebook. Looks like this time I was the one slow on the uptake.

One more night sleeping in my Pop's very uncomfortable bed. I've finally figured out how to get the right water temperature when taking a shower, my last night here. Early, snow flurries were drifting to the ground outside. The weather forecast is sunny but cold tomorrow. I'm ready to hit the road about 9 o'clock. It will be good to get home. I won't be doing this again for quite some time. The next time I'm scheduled to come up is March 10, for a class reunion committee meeting. I'll see if I can talk someone into going to the Brickside Grill with me again for Chicken Quesadilla. I can taste it now.

Two More Days

Two more days in Pennsylvania. As I suspected, this has been an eye opening stay. I moved to Delaware permanently November 17, 2006. That was the last time I stayed overnight in Pennsylvania. I've made many visits since then but I've always returned the same day. Since it is a 2 1/2 hour drive both ways, that made for a long day. This trip I decided to stay a few nights out of respect for my Mother and to connect with friends.

My brother Isaac and I took our Mom to the doctor's office today. She needs help going anywhere because she can hardly walk. She now uses a cane. However, when one of us is around she will hang on to one of us. After the visit to the doctor, we took her to one of her favorite discount grocery stores. She's good if she can balance herself on a shopping cart. She likes to shop at the discount stores like the Dollar Store. She doesn't have to shop at those stores but that what she prefers. She grew up during the Depression (how ironic at the end of her life she us undergoing another economic depression) and it's hard for her to change her thrifty habits.

We had lunch at Wegmans. Oh how I miss Wegmans (I think I've made this point before.) Wegmans is just the best store ever. It has everything, plus a wonderful food court that is GOOD! Better than ANYTHING Rehoboth Beach or Lewes has to offer. Plus, I can get almost anything at Wegmans. I especially like their homemade spicy hummus. Try getting something like that at Safeway in Rehoboth. Yesterday I had lunch with a friend and I asked him if he and his wife were considering moving from Pennsylvania. He said "Why would I? Everything I want is here." He was right. Everything is right there in the Downingtown area. No traveling 30 miles to Dover or 90 miles to Wilmington to a half way decent shopping mall. But then, he can afford to pay the high Pennsylvania taxes. I couldn't. That's why I moved.

Pennsylvania is a beautiful state. The rolling hills, winding roads, streams and rivers. Delaware is basically a flat plain near the coast. Very few winding roads. I love Delaware and have no regrets that I moved there. But I still miss the state I was born in, Pennsylvania.

Tomorrow I have lunch with my former classmate Judy and her son Ben at my favorite restaurant in Pennsylvania, the Brickside Grill. I have enjoyed reuniting with friends and spending time with my Mother but I will be glad to go home again. When I return I won't be staying longer than two days.

I hope that bridge is open when I roll on down 896 on Sunday morning. I don't need any delays going home.

The Trip From Hell

Okay, here I am at Mom's in Pennsylvania. But getting here wasn't easy. My trip yesterday was the Trip From Hell.

I live in Sussex County, Delaware, approximately 2 1/2 miles from my Mom's home outside of Downingtown, Pennsylvania. The quickest way to travel to Pennsylvania is north on Rt. 1 to I-95 into Pennsylvania then Rt. 202. I hate I-95. Even though I'm only on it a short time (about 7 miles), I take Rt. 141 to avoid the bypass around Wilmington because if I take the whole I-95 I have to know EXACTLY what exits to take at speeds up to 80 MPH or else I end up in a residential section of Wilmington, which has happened to me more than once. The speed limit on I-95 is 65 MPH but you're putting your life at risk if you travel that slow. I have traveled at 75 MPH and have cars and trucks passing me on both sides!)

A few years ago I received advice from my dentist and his wife, who also have a home in Delaware and travel frequently between PA and Delaware, to take the "scenic route." The "scenic route" is Rt. 10 from Parkesburg to Rt. 896 through Newark, Delaware, over the Summit Bridge over the C & D Canal to pick up Rt. 1 in Delaware. Once I'm on Rt. 1 it's a straight shot for about 76 miles to where I live just off the left of Rt. 1 outside of Lewes, Delaware. My dentist's wife explained it succinctly when she said she would rather arrive at her home in a relaxed state rather than stressed out from the I-95 Road Warrior Games. This is the route I've taken for my many plesant trips back and forth between Pennsylvania and Delaware for the past two years.

Yesterday I left my home in Delaware, looking forward to a relaxing daytime trip on that sunny day to visit my Mother in Pennsylvania. This trip has long been postponed because of weather. I still had Christmas presents to deliver to Mom.

All went well until I exited Rt. 1 and took the short connection to Rt. 896 at Summit. Upon entering the road I noticed that there was very little traffic. Warning flags should have popped up but no, I was blissfully unaware of what I was about to encounter. Several miles up the road, I see the familiar orange cones directing me into different lanes. I could see the Summit Bridge in the distance. I saw a police car to the left, lights blinking on the car roof. I'm following the orange cones and notice that they are leading me away from the bridge. I see no signs. Only the cop car. I'm assuming the country road I'm traveling down is a detour. But then I'm thinking, "How can that be? I have to go over the canal." Then I realize, the road is only open for local residents. Dumb Ron. So I backtrack and go all the way back to Rt. 1.

North I travel on Rt. 1, to where I'm not sure. All I know is I don't want the road ahead of me to suck me into I-95. I travel north until I see a sign that says "Newark." That's where I want to go so I can pick up my "scenic route." The road is Rt. 272. It was another scenic trip for several miles through the suburban countryside of Newark until I entered Newark. Upon entering Newark I realized it was high noon and most of the college students of the University of Delaware were crowding the sidewalks and spilling over into the streets. I inched my way through the milling throngs of fresh young college student faces. Finally I see my connection to Rt. 896 and, with relief, I make the right turn exiting Newark and the college students.

Since I was so late I decided to call my elderly cousin Elsie in Kelton PA to return the old time picture that I had borrowed from her sister, who lives nearby her. I couldn't deliver it to her sister because I wasn't sure how to get to her place. I stop at the Country Kitchen for a quick lunch. It wasn't good. They called it Chicken Quesadillo but I call it "Chicken Queasy." After lunch with the "Chicken Queasy" battling digestion in my stomach, I called Cousin Elsie to tell her I'm arriving.

Cousin Elsie was waiting for me. I asked her for directions to her sister's home. She gave me some convoluted directions which normally I wouldn't even attempt to try. However, I was feeling confident because of my success in finding another way into Newark. Well, to make a long story short (and not to bore the ready), I tried FOUR TIMES to find Cousin Mary's home and I COULD NOT FIND IT. Admitting defeat, went back to Cousin Elsie and asked her to return the picture to her sister. She offered to show me how to get to her sister's home but warned me that she couldn't tarry because she had a pie in the oven. I assured her I wouldn't "tarry." The time was already approaching 3 PM. I had called my Mother and told her I would be at her home around noon. Already I'm three hours behind.

Well, Cousin Elsie got me to her sister's but she realized she had left a couple of roads out of her directions. She told me "Oh, I live her so long, I don't even think of those roads." Uh huh. Well, I was glad I could return my cousin's picture to her and I'm glad Cousin Elsie took time to show me how to get to her sister's home. I returned Cousin Elsie home in time so her pie didn't burn in the oven.

Finally, I arrive at my Mom's. I was tired. Last night I had a full schedule ahead of me. A classmate of mine had asked me to dinner at her home followed by a night of fun and festivities at Trivia Night at the Brickside Grille. Dinner was wonderful. I had a mini reunion with two of my classmates who I hadn't seen since I moved to Delaware. A friend of the hostess and her son were also at dinner.

After dinner we walked down to the Brickside Grille to play trivia. We did great. We were leading all the other teams until the last round. We only lost by one question. I'll take the blame for that. I could kick myself because we have a rule not to change answers. The first impulse is usually right. The question was "What reptile did John Quincy Adams keep in the White House?" Our hostess immediately answered "Crocodile". Crocodile? John Quincey Adams? Powdered wigs? Paul Revere? Cobblestone streets? I didn't think so. I changed the answer to snakes. Well, the answer was crocodile. Stick the rules the next time Ron. Still, we had a good night of camaraderie and friendship. I'm finding that the older I get the more fun I have getting together with my fellow oldsters. The usual topics of discussion are about our forgetfulness and latest aches and pains. However, it's all done in good humor.

We said our goodbyes and I headed out towards home. It was strange traveling the winding and twisting roads of Pennsylvania at night compared to the straight and flat roads of Sussex County, Delaware. I do miss Pennsylvania. I would have stayed if the taxes weren't so high, and getting higher. I am happy where I live now in Delaware, two miles from Delaware Bay.

I've decided to stay until Sunday. This is a good mini vacation. The bed in my Mom's house isn't as comfortable (it's in my Pop's former bedroom), and his picture is on the wall with that "What's the matter with you?" look I was all too familiar with when he was living. But I'm glad I have time to spend with my Mom. She's 85 years old now and not getting around too well. I took her shopping at Wegmans this morning which she enjoyed very much. I love Wegmans. Perhaps the number one thing I miss about living in Delaware.

Now to plan for the trip back to Delaware. I checked the Internet and it said the Summit Bridge would only be closed until Friday. God I hope so.

Leaving for Pennsylvania

The sun is out, the temperature is up. A perfect day to leave for Pennsylvania to visit my Mom and see friends. I'm only going to be gone for two days (returning on Friday) but looking at everything I'm taking with me one would think I was leaving for a month. I can't help it. I have to have all the bases covered. I don't travel light.

Today I take my Mom to run some errands. I give my brother Isaac a break. This evening I'm having dinner with three widowed classmates of mine at 6 PM. Roast pork is on the menu. Yum! After dinner we retreat to the Brickside Grille for Trivia Night. It's been a long time since I went to Trivia Night at the Brickside. I'm looking forward to a pleasant evening with friends.

Tomorrow my former boss at Downingtown National Bank pays a house call to Mom to collect information from her to do her taxes. I'm looking forward to seeing him. Also, I hope to squeeze a lunch in with another longtime school chum.

On the way back to Delaware on Friday I will stop in to see my cousin Elsie and return her dad's obituary and family picture that I borrowed to copy for my genealogy records. All in all, a busy two days planned.

I think my cell phone battery is charged and I'm ready to get out of here!

Going to Visit Mom in Pennsylvania

The weather forecast looks safe for the next couple of days so I’m planning on visiting my Mom in Pennsylvania. She is a 2 ½ drive away. Not a bad drive actually, but I don’t like to drive in the rain (“intermittent showers” are forecast – I can handle that) or snow. I didn’t want to visit while snow and ice were still on the ground at her home. This past weekend’s mild temperatures melted whatever was left of the past two month’s winter debris. It looks like clear sailing up Rt. 1 to Pennsylvania tomorrow.

While I’m up in Pennsylvania I’m also going to visit friends (old high school classmates) for dinner tomorrow night. My friend just sent me an e-mail and said she’s cooking roast pork. I love roast pork! After dinner we’re going to the Brickside Grille for Trivia Night. Oh how I miss Trivia Night at the Brickside. That perhaps is one of the few things I missed when I moved to Delaware. I always looked forward to getting together with friends for an evening out at least one night a week. A martini or two (depending on the specials that night), a competitive game of trivia (we even won a couple of times), and camaraderie between good friends. It doesn’t get any better than that. The only downside is that Pennsylvania still permits smoking in its bars and restaurants. I never did get used to eating my Chicken Quesadilla while inhaling second hand smoke. But hey, who said the world was perfect?

I plan on staying at Mom’s for at least two nights. I’m working tonight at the Inn and I don’t have to go back to work until next Monday night. That gives me a couple of days with my Mom. She told me this morning she is planning on moving to South Carolina to live with my brother John and his wife. Their house is better suited for our Mother’s condition now. She has a hard time getting around. My brother Isaac takes care of her now but her house in Pennsylvania has too many stairs and other obstacles that cause her to take falls. Plus, the snow and ice are a constant threat. Sooner or later she’s going to break something then be permanently disabled. It is better that she move now before something happens. She’s worried about her two elderly cats, Molly and Rusty, but I told her that Isaac will take good care of them.

This is another milestone in our lives. There was once a time when Mom took care of me and my brothers. Now it is our turn to take care of our Mom. She deserves no less. We are so fortunate to have her for our Mother. I know everyone says their Mom is the best. Well, I can say it without doubt. We have the best Mom in the world for us. I think of all the people who lost their Mom’s at a young age. My Mother lost her Mother when she wasn’t quite two years old. She grew up only knowing a series of step-moms, who weren’t too nice to her. She never had the good fortune that me and my brothers had by having a Mom who has always looked after us. My Mom said when she first got married she wanted a little girl because she had no Mom. After her first three children were boys, she told my Father "That’s enough! I’m not going to have a dozen sons like your Mother.” My father had 11 brothers, no sisters. She had to make do with us boys. Now she says she is glad she has sons because she didn’t know if a daughter would take care of her like we have. Thanks Mom!

Monday Morning Blues

Monday, the beginning of another week here in my retirement home in Delaware. As is usual, after breakfast I retreat to my home office which is bathed in the morning sunlight. The light and warmth of that sunlight will last until about 10 o’clock. I always try to take advantage of the special qualities of my home office early in the morning on sunny days like this. Later on, I’ll take a walk in the development behind me. The walk always clears my mind.

Bill took off early this morning to meet his American Legion van pickup to the Wilmington Veterans Medical Center. He has a dermatology appointment. He didn’t want to go but I urged him to go anyway. Last summer the VA discovered my friend Bob had melanoma cancer. The VA took quick action to cut out a chunk of Bob’s arm to save him. I don’t want something like that happening to Bill.

The weather was very mild yesterday, almost spring like. Today the temperature is already up to 50 degrees. I guess I have to start looking at yard cleanup for spring. I have several giant Pampas grass plants. The challenge is what am I going to do with all that dead grass that I have to remove for this year’s new shoots? At my old home in Pennsylvania, there was never a problem with what to do with yard debris. I had a gigantic compost pile. Everything went into that compost pile. By summer the bottom of that pile was black gold. I doubt if the people who bought my property even know that it exists. I can’t have a compost pile down here. My acre of land is totally landscaped and out in the open. No room to hide a compost pile. I wanted to get one of the compost bins but Bill won’t hear of it. I guess I’ll just have to compost the dead Pampas grass leaves in the black trash bags for the weekly trash pickup. It’s a shame to waste it but I don’t see what other alternative I have.

This past weekend I was a bit bummed out. I had an opportunity to work Saturday night. I should have done that instead of going out and wasting my time playing Bingo. Other than seeing my friends Jack and Paul again, I didn’t enjoy myself. I like to dine out, but the restaurants in Rehoboth and the general area leave a lot to be desired. They’re overpriced and tasteless. Maybe it’s me. Years ago I used to visit Provincetown, Massachusetts several times during the summer. The restaurants in Provincetown were always excellent and reasonably priced. Not so here in the summer capital for Washington, DC phonies. Maybe I’m not eating in the right restaurants. I don’t patronize restaurants that charge $30 and up for ONE entrée. I don’t have a big Washington DC salary or retirement pay. Maybe that’s the problem. I’m going to take a break for awhile from the social and nighttime scene in this area. I don’t like driving at nights anyway. There are too many aggressive drivers down here. Must be that entitled DC mentality.

I have a beautiful and comfortable home and an interesting and absorbing hobby, genealogy. This past weekend a 3rd cousin (once removed) contacted me from Georgia. He is the great grandson of Wiley Tipton, older brother of my great-great grandfather John Tipton who died fighting for the Union Cause in the Civil War. His great grandfather Wiley, fought for the Confederate Cause. We have information to share. This past week a lady from Washington State contacted me. She is descended from my great-great grandmother’s family. We’re sharing information. I get so much more a sense of satisfaction from this activity than I do dodging the crazy aggressive drivers in traffic on Route 1 to dine at some overpriced restaurant on mediocre food.

Unless one is into church attendance, there is little social life in this area. I have a few friends but they have their own activities which do not coincide with mine. I’m going to change direction in my activities and concentrate on home life and spend more time visiting my Mom and friends in Pennsylvania. Weather permitting. The threat of snow is still strong but, perhaps the warming temperatures of this past weekend will melt the accumulated snow and ice of the past month. I need a change.

Bingo-a-Go-Go

All day I was looking forward to going out last night to Bingo-a-Go-Go in Rehoboth Beach. I haven’t been able to attend these four times a year fund raisers for AIDS because I’ve had to work at the Inn. Thus, it was a pleasant surprise when my friend Paul and Jack called me last week and asked me to join them for a night of dining and fun and festivities. Wouldn’t you know it? Monica from work called me about 1 in the afternoon and asked if I could work her shift for her because her youngest child was sick. I had to turn her down because I had already purchased the tickets for bingo and made dinner arrangements at Casa Dileo with my friend Paul and Jack. I had also invited my friend and neighbor Barbara. She said she couldn’t make dinner but would meet us at the Convention Center.

Four o’clock rolls around. I had arranged to meet Paul and Jack at 5 PM in front of Casa Dileo. I drove into Rehoboth and parked at my friend Ed’s house so I wouldn’t have to fight the traffic from the Convention Center when bingo was over. Walking from my friend Ed’s place to Casa Dileo, I ran into my first problem, construction work being done on Route 1. I couldn’t walk on the side of the road. Dodging traffic I walked to other side of the road. My cell phone rings. It’s Paul. He wants to know where I’m at. I told him I’m dodging traffic trying to walk to the restaurant. I hang up. My cell phone rings again. It’s my neighbor Barbara calling. She said she wasn’t feeling well so she wouldn’t be joining me. Take note, already I’ve received two bad omens for the night.

I meet Jack and Paul in front of the restaurant. As soon as I walk into the restaurant I’m turned off by the smell. It smelled like I was walking into a garage. I didn’t need to change the oil in my car. What was that smell? I didn’t want to ruin the evening since it was Paul’s suggestion we dine at Casa DiLeo so I said nothing. After we were seated and given our menus, I noticed that this was one of those restaurants that had the same items on the menu, doubled in price for dinner. I could get an Eggplant Parmesan dish, “lunch” price $8.95. The “Dinner” price $15.95. Either it was the same entree, with a jacked up price for dinner or it was a lot more food, neither of which was an option I wanted last night. We agreed to order a pizza and share it.

After dinner, we drove down to the Rehoboth Convention Center for the night’s festivities. I’ve been to a couple of gay bingos before. The first time was a lot of fun because it was new. The second time, well, not so much. Last night? It was boring. Basically gay bingo is every straight person's stereotype of a gay guy calling out the numbers interspersed with raunchy gay themed jokes. The word of the night last night was the four letter Anglo-Saxon word for excrement that begins with S. The bingo caller was much amused by ending just about every sentence with that well known four letter word.

Throughout the audience are about a half a dozen drag queens who checked to make sure you have a bingo when you call out “Bingo!” The joke is, if you call “Bingo!” in error, you have to wear a ratty old drag queen wig. That’s funny the first few times when you see it then it becomes old. It was old last night.

The drag queens had bright, colorful, flashy outfits which they changed several time during the evening. If you're into drag, it may have enjoyed seeing the different gowns and dresses on the slim hipped ladies with Adam's Apples. While it wasn't like checking out Princess Diana's new gowns, it was fascinating to see what new dress and wig Mona Lotts would appear. The guys playing the drag queens were a pretty somber bunch. One would expect more humor and levity but it seemed like they were also tired of the format and would rather have been somewhere else.

The event is a worthy one, it raises money for AIDS charities. It is gives the gay community a chance to assemble in one spot and experience fellowship. However, something odd this year, I only saw one person I slightly knew (introduced one through a mutual friend.) We didn’t see anyone else we knew, NO ONE. That was strange. Maybe our friends were on to something. Maybe they also got tired of the format. Maybe I don't have that many gay friends.

It wouldn’t have been a bad night if one of us could have won at least ONE bingo. But, as is always the case, no one I know wins. The last time I won a bingo was back in 1960 at the service club in Ft. Meade, Maryland. I won a Kingston Trio record album (which I think I still have, not because I like the Kingston Trio – I hate folk songs – but because it was proof I actually won something.) Most of the prizes last night were cash but one prize was a “beauty basket.” That was the prize I came closest to winning (like I needed THAT PRIZE.) If I won that prize I would have donated it back to the cause.

One thing that I find interesting and has always puzzled me when a group of gay men and lesbians gather together is how much the cliques stay intact. There is little if no interaction between the people unless they knew them previously. Yet one can go to straight event and strike up a friendship with straight people much easier. I've never been able to put understand this phenomenon about gay people, their tendency to stay in cliques when out in the public. They cling to their small group of friends. I can understand why lesbians are so insular, they don't want to have anything to do with men. They do quite well with their women friends, thank you. It's the men I don't understand. If you start up a conversation with a stranger, right away they think you're coming on to them. There is little understanding just for a friendship without the sexual connection. This attitude of most gay men is something that has baffled me for you and I'll probably go to my grave never understanding it.

All in all, it was good to have an evening with my friends Paul and Jack but I won’t be going back to gay bingo again. Maybe I’m getting too old for this kind of thing. I remember 30 years ago when I was 37 years old. I was standing in a gay bar (the 247 in Philadelphia) when the bartender started to flick the lights on and off, calling “Last call!” I thought to myself at that time “What am I doing here? I would rather be home in bed.” That’s the way I felt last night. I would have been better off in bed. Actually, I wish I would have to work for Monica. At least I wouldn’t still be burping up that pizza I had last night.