Bill continues to have his swallowing problems.
It takes him a good forty-five minutes to an hour to eat his pureed oatmeal in the morning and in the evening. I didn't even feed him is oatmeal this evening. I can't take the sounds of him choking and gagging for that length of time. I usually go outside while he's eating but the weather is getting to cold for that escape.
Coincidentally I received a call from the VA this morning scheduling a first time visit from the VA Home Health Care system. This is a first for us. The last time we were at the VA, I was informed that Bill qualified (because of his age and psychical condition, for the VA Home Health Care program. Bill would no longer have to travel to the local VA Outpatient Clinic in Georgetown (twelve miles away) to visit his doctor.
I was informed that this first time visit will take a couple of hours. Visiting will be a VA doctor and a nurse. This visit is to setup Bill. I have to have all his medications ready. They will give him a comprehensive physical. At this time I will ask them what I can do about feeding Bill. I'm even ready to take on the feeding tube in the stomach option now, seeing how Bill is struggling with swallowing liquids.
Another increasing problem we have is Bill's mental condition at the end of day. He has the classic "Sundowner's Syndrome." He's so confused at the end of the day which for him starts about five PM. It's especially hard on me because Bill can't process what I'm saying to him. He still knows who I am and where he is but that's about it. The rest of what's going on around him confuses him. Even taking his pills and going downstairs to his bedroom.
Again and again I'll say it. I am so thankful that I can take care of Bill here at his home where he is comfortable. Eventually he will pass on and I hope when that time comes it is peaceful for him here at his home. I just can't bear to think of him in a "facility" or a hospital. The last few years he's been in the hospital too many times already. Even though they took excellent care of him at those hospitals and rehab facilities there truly is no place like home.
Today was a beautiful fall day. While I was taking advantage of this glorious day around noon time, I saw where Bill came out for a walk. I've posted that video at the beginning of this blog post. This is what it is all about now folks. Enjoying and treasuring whatever time we have left together.
14 comments:
It’s sad to hear of all the other problems Bill has but I think he walks better than I do.
Jim
You have the compassion of a saint, Ron. Bill couldn't have a better caretaker in his final years. I'm glad he will be having a health care check-up. It's also wonderful that he can get out and walk. Take care, my friend.
I think that Bill try's very hard to make you think that he isn't a burden to you. It seems that for some reason he has engrained into his brain that if he is ambulatory he is less of a burden and he will be able to remain at home with you. Bless his heart, he tries so hard. I can only imagine the fear he he carries with him that he might have to go to a care facility. Sundowning is frustrating for the individual experiencing it. I had my great aunt at home with me for a year before she passed on. All her life she started her day at 4 AM and ended it at 7 PM. She insisted upon 3 meals a day and the third one had to be a proper supper. The digesting of her meals placed a large portion of her oxygen reach blood in her stomach region and took it away from her brain. The doctors warned me that the final meal should be kept light and easy to digest. Auntie would have nothing to do with that. She insisted upon a green salad and tomato juice for a starter, 8 ounces of red meat, a loaded baked potato and often times her favorite vegetable, southern fried cabbage all as the entre, and for dessert large slice of peanut butter pie or southern fried hand pies. And of course there had to bread and butter and maybe some radishes. Coffee, with cream and sugar. Supper was a heavy meal but she ate all and then I paid a dear price for providing her the food. She became mean and very nasty because she was now brain oxygen deprived because of the stomach working so hard to digest the food. She began sundowning at about 2 PM and it peaked at 5 PM when the meal was served. The verbal abuse from her was hard to take and I used to eat after she went to bed. It was sort of like you, Ron, having to block out the sound of meal attempting to swallow. For me it lasted a year but you have had to endure this problem so much longer. To the neighbors she was the dear sweet old lady who like to chat with them when she sat out in the garden amongst the flowers. One time I had to stay overnight in the hospital for testing and a neighbor said she would be so happy to spend the night with auntie. Well auntie wound up in the ER that night because she became so abusive to the neighbor looking after her. The doctor said she was the sweetest person until 2PM rolled around and by bedtime became almost violent. The neighbors called be Saint Woody after that. About 11 months into her stay she suddenly became weak and her heart slowed and she slept all time and passed in her sleep one night. Ron, like Jon says your a saint. We all don't see what you go through daily but I have a good idea because of my experiences. Most days I like to think are normal (whatever that is) but there are days when I have trouble connecting the dots (I think you all know what I mean). This makes me start thinking who is going to take care of me? Guess I'll find out the hard way. Well. I am so glad the VA is coming through for Bill and hopefully for you, too. Be safe, be very, very careful, and be happy. Woody in Ohio
Bill appears to be doing well with ambulation. I know swallowing is an issue. Hopefully you'll get some answers/solutions when the doctor and nurse make their visit. Sundowners is a real thing. I've seen it so much in the hospital setting. I'd present that to the doctor when he comes and see if a medication can help a little. Medications can be dicey at this age d/t falls. Good luck. Keep us posted. You do a wonderful job in the care of Bill.
Paranormal John
Hello, Birthday Coming on the 31st Ron,
I can't wait to read about the outcome of the VA visit. They will probably say that Bill is a tough old goat. Well, why wouldn't he be? He has had to live with you. :) And we know you are a handful.
I am glad you are coming around on the feeding tube. I bet you a penny you will see a dramatic change in Bill's quality of life.
I have taken care many of patients in my time with feeding tubes. Young and old. I have placed one-nasel in my time while in the Air Force. It was a young troop on my surgical floor. I was nervous as hell. I did it and completed all the necessary checks to ensure I placed it in the right place.
Enjoy the weather. They are predicting snow in Denver on Sunday-less than 1/2 inch.
Best,
Victor
Hello
I just wanted to hop on and say that as a special education preschool teacher I have had several students in my classroom who had feeding tubes. It took a bit to get used to but to be honest it wasn't that hard---I thought I would let you know in case you are worried about that at all!
Hang in there, good luck with the meeting
I am glad to hear about the updates; I hope writing about things helps you
Jon,
Thank you for your kind words but I'm just doing what has to be done. I am so thankful that I can take care of Bill here at his home where he is most comfortable. So many old folks are warehoused at the end of their life in a place they don't want to be.
Ron
Jim,
I think I have Bill's swallowing problems solved. I will write about it.
Ron
Woody,
Thank you again for your always informative and hcan'tcan/t imagine feeding anybody that kind of big meal every night at dinner before they went to bed. What you had to go through, unbelievable!
My Mother got mean at the end so my brother, who she was living with, told me. That wasn't like her. Thank goodness, that isn't Bill but then I don't feed him a huge meal at the end of the day.
Like you I wonder (sometimes0 who will take care of me when my times comes. Can't worry too much about that now though, my main job now is taking care of Bill and making him as comfortable as I can at this time of his life.
Thanks again for your comments Woody. Always appreciated.
Ron
Paranormal John,
I think I have Bill's swallowing problem resolved, thank goodness. That was my biggest challenge. And now that we're in the VA home healthcare program, I feel so much more comfortable.
Ron
Vic,
We're still not doing a feeding tube for Bill. I think I found the solution for Bill's swallowing problem. I will write abut it in my next blog.Thanks for your advice.
Ron
Julia A.
Thanks for your advice re the feeding tube but I think I found a solution to Bill's swallowing problems.
Ron
Ur-spo,
Thanks for your good wishes. Yes, writing about my challenges helps me to cope with them.
Ron
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