Bill's Emergency Room Visit February 17, 2021

"Alicia", Bill's home health aide checking Bill's blood pressure yesterday

 Bill's medical care crises continues. 

Yesterday morning "Alicia", Bill's health aide of the day, checked his blood pressure as they always do when they come in for his home health care. She said his blood pressure was 88 over 62, too low. She advised me to go to the local Emergency Room immediately. My first response was "Oh no, another emergency room visit? What can they do?" I asked her "Do I have to?"  She said "It's up to you." She said whenever a patient's blood pressure is below 90 he should go to the local emergency room. 

What do I know? I bundled Bill up and got him ready for the ride to our local Emergency Room, a place I know well having visited there several times with my numerous kidney stone episodes. Of course I knew by driving in and not taking the ambulance we would be waiting in the Emergency Room for how long? But I couldn't justify taking an ambulance so I drove him to the Emergency Room.

Bill in the local Emergency Room yesterday, waiting for a "room" availability 

We arrived on the cold and windy day that was yesterday. On the best of days Bill is cold because of the blood thinner medication that he takes, yesterday he was freezing.

I checked in at the arrival desk and was told to take a seat to await a room, none was available at this time.

We settled in and thus began the Long Wait. Bill was getting colder and colder. I didn't want to be one of those unreasonable people in Emergency Rooms by demanding special attention but I had to do something because Bill was so cold. They gave me a blanket to put over him. I got another blanket out of out car. Bill was bundled up like a hostage. Still no room.

While waiting I called the VA Emergency Hotline that has to be called within 72 hours for veteran's emergency room coverage. Normally that call runs smoothly but, of course, yesterday that hit several kinks. After about twenty minutes on the phone I was given the authorization number for VA coverage for this emergency room visit. At least I made some good use of our long wait in the Emergency Room.

Finally, just as we were about to leave (I couldn't stay any longer because Bill was going crazy), a nurse came out and said they had a room available.

Bill "Freezing" yesterday waiting for a room availability at our local Emergency Room yesterday

They wheeled (wheelchair) Bill back into the room (actually a bay separated by curtains) and told me they would call me back when they had him ready. Bill can't communicate because of his hearing and cognitive problems, they realized they would need me back with him to calm him down and tell them what the problem was, if there was a problem.

They ran the usual series of test (EKG, blood test, urinalysis (which was a bear getting Bill to pee in the jug lying down, picture a fountain) and X-Ray. They found nothing out of the ordinary. 

Bill being checked out by the Emergency Room doctor

The ER doctor came back and explained to me that Bill's blood pressure probably went down because of the medication he's  taking for his atrial fibrillation (metoprolol tartrate 25 MG). Bill has to take that medication so he doesn't have another blackout that caused him to fall twice in a couple of days last month, resulting in bleeding in his brain. 

The ER doctor contacted Bill's VA doctor and she advised to cut his "meta" pill dosage in half, which is what I did last night.

We returned home about 4:30 PM, after spending the whole day at the Emergency Room, not having lunch and both of us very stressed out.

What did I learn from yesterday's episode? I have determined to remove Bill from home health care for physical and occupation therapy and put him on hospice home health care. We can't be running to the Emergency Room every time is blood pressure dips below 90. Yesterday just about did both of us in. If Bill loses me, he's done. I have to make this hard choice for both of us and our health. 

The home health aide yesterday was doing what she is paid to do, following her parameters. If she didn't she and the home health aide company could be sued. I understand that. That home health aide company and the Emergency Room is to keep Bill alive. I have to transition to hospice care to keep Bill comfortable. Bill is 92 years old, greatly weakened and will never be the person he was just a few months ago. Yesterday, just before the home health aide person came in, Bill and I were actually settling into a routine, albeit a greatly different one that we had before Bill's accident last month. Yesterday, with that Emergency Room visit, that was greatly upended for what reason? Following protocol for keeping him alive.  

There comes a time when one realizes that our life will never be what it was before. I have come to that realization. I am so thankful that I am one of the lucky few that is able to have my loved one here at our home where he is happy and comfortable. I am doing everything I can to make Bill's remaining days comfortable. I just couldn't bear the idea of Bill dying in an impersonal rehab facility, alone and abandoned. But at the same time I have to consider my health too. If I'm not around there is no one to take care of Bill. We're both done. At least with hospice care we can develop a routine until the End, however long that is.

Today was so much different than yesterday. Bill is even going to the bathroom by himself. I was just too tired to help him last night. I noticed this morning that he got everything in his pee jug in his downstairs bathroom. He's also using the upstairs bathroom. He still needs help getting up from the toilet for his Number Two's. I installed a special apparatus to help him with that. He hasn't tried it yet but I'm confident it will work. I'm not good at these handyman jobs but I'm managing, much to my surprise. I did ask my local hired handyman to stop by this weekend to tighten up what I installed and maybe a new grab bar in the bathroom.

New toiled contraption with handrails for Bill

The weather today was freezing rain. Thank goodness we have power, unlike those poor folks in Texas who have that God awful incompetent Republican government that has caused thousands of Texans to loose power and causes unnecessary deaths because of their lack of foresight. The Texas Republicans are more concerned about cultural issues than they are about protecting their citizens from harm. Today's Republican Party should go to hell for what they have done to this country but this is another whole subject I'm just too tired to rant about now. I have more immediate problems. I haven't even gotten my COVID shot yet because our Delaware (Democrat) governor hasn't figured out how to make it easier for Delawareans to get COVID vaccinations. Equal opportunity incompetence. 

For the first time in weeks, I was about to take an afternoon nap, albeit a short one. Still, a nap which refreshes me and gives me a jump start on the rest of the day. Usually I go to bed at night around eleven or twelve. These past two weeks I've been going to bed at 8:30 and 9:00 and sleeping through, less several pee breaks during the night, until the morning.

Bill is out in the sun room napping now. Earlier, he was up and about without his walker, walking around the house and visiting his workshop in the basement. We had a shower (I helped him) this morning which wasn't too painful for Bill. He even found his old moccasins and put them on, thus for the first time not padding around the house in those non skid socks we got from the rehab hospital. And a sure sign that Bill is returning to his old way, he even admonished me for not pulling my car far enough into the garage, that's Bill always behind me correcting me. Of course I didn't pull the car all the way into our garage because I wanted to give him enough room to walk around the front of my car but he wasn't hearing that. Bill default position is too correct me. I'm used to it after fifty-six years. You should see us driving, Bill is the typical back seat driver. How many times have I offered to pull the car over to the side of the road and let him drive? I tell him "Either I drive this car or you do, we both can't drive it at the same time."

We didn't go for out daily drive today because of the rain and ice outside. We don't need any accidents now that our life here at home is so precarious. We have no backup plan. It's just us. My turn caring for Bill the same way he did when I tore my quadricep leg muscle five years ago.

Today would have been one of my regular work days at the hotel, 3 PM to 11 PM shift.  I do miss my job. Working two days a week was the perfect balance of my life. Caring for Bill here at home is the new "balance" of my life. I am working on making it as workable as possible so we both can have a measure of peace and serenity at this time of our lives, the Final Chapter of our great love story. And that it is folks. These days I often think of what a wonderful life I've had with Bill over the past fifty-six years. Of course I block out the disagreeable times, those "bumps" in our relationship (and who doesn't have "bumps" in their relationships?) We both have had a fabulous life and now we're bringing it to a fabulous ending. Off into the sunset, me and Bill.

Bill in his hometown of Toccoa, Georgia April 23, 2013 during our last trip South. Oh how he loved those trips. It's a shame we can't do them anymore. So sad.