Annual Health Checkup

Today I visited the VA Outpatient clinic in Georgetown for the results of my annual blood work. I was also meeting for the first time my new doctor who is actually a nurse practitioner.

The good news:

All signs are good. 

My PSA crept up a little bit as it has done in previous blood tests but it still is under one on a scale of one to four. Four years ago my PSA score spiked up to 8.7. That's when I discovered I had prostate cancer which I had treated. After my treatment my PSA was .1.  Last year it crept up to .23. Now it is .31.  I half expect my prostate cancer will return but I'm at that age (old enough) that I'll probably die of something else besides prostate cancer. Whatever, I'm not getting any more treatments for prostate cancer. If that's the way I go, so be it. After all, something is going to get me.  

The other good news is that I like my new care doctor.  He's a young man, handsome, caring, knowledgeable and he actually listened to me. I was with him for over an hour. I hope I have him as my health care professional until I make my grand exit. I'm very lucky, all my doctors now I like. My urologist I didn't like so I changed a couple of years ago.  That doctor could hardly spend more than two minutes with me and he hurt me often. He also had no respect for my privacy and humiliated me often by his rushing around just to get as many patients in and out as possible. I had enough and I changed. Later I found out at my new urologist's office, who had opened a new offer her in Lower Slower, why did they open an office from far away their main office in Dover. They told me they were getting a lot of patients traveling to their office in Delaware who weren't satisfied with the treatment they were getting from my doctor.  So I wasn't the only one which made me feel good and not just an old man complainer.

I also got my second (and final) shingles shot. My left arm feels like someone gave me a good solid knuckle punch. But at least (hopefully) I won't get shingles, which I've never had but I hear are very painful. I've had enough pain in my life with my multiple kidney stones, I don't need any more pain, thank you.

Another day in the life folks! 

Ron's TV Interview

This afternoon, while going through my thousands of photos looking for those photos where I dyed my hair blonde (it was a disaster) I came across these photos taken in 2013 during the Marriage Equality Delaware state legislature sessions.  Phew! That was a long sentence. I do try to avoid those folks.

The first set of photos was a demonstration I attended in Dover, Delaware for marriage equality. These photos show me being interviewed by a local TV station, an interview I never saw on TV.  My friend Charles Meade, who invited and took me to the demonstration, took the photos. I would have loved to seen the interview on TV.  But you know what folks?  Pat, my Canadian Travel Buddy,  saw a photo of me on the Internet testifying before the Delaware State Legislature and that's how he found me.

Me, all gussied up and ready to testify for marriage equality

The photo that captured Pat's attention - who knew all those years making myself available in all the Wrong Places, this is the photo and circumstance that I would meet my doppelgänger?

Was I nervous testifying? I would say so! (I found this picture on a newspaper website. Somewhere there is a video because there were a lot of cameras that day. Maybe I find it someday

He did an Internet search and found my blog, we started to talk via FaceTime and then he came down for a visit. And as they say, "The rest is history."  I met the guy I've been looking for my whole life (in all the wrong places of course).  Ironic that I would meet him though me involved in making my relationship with Bill legal.  But there it is, life is strange and full of serendipity. 

During the demonstration at in Dover I got a chance to meet Delaware Governor Markel who I personally thanked for supporting Marriage Equality. Thank you Governor Markel!

Me shaking hands with Delaware governor Jack Markel (him wondering "who the hell is this guy?" because I did ambush him)) Dover, Delaware 2013

All's well that ends well.  Bill and I were married shortly thereafter, on our 49th anniversary of the day we met. This year we marked our 55th year of Togetherness. What a life! 

I'm glad I found these pictures. This is why I take and have photographs (and videos) taken folks, to relieve those momentous life changing times. 

I don't have to wonder who will inherit my 100,000 plus photos and 6,500 videos but one thing I know, they will last forever in the Internet because I have now posted them.

My Presidential Prediction

Mayor Pete Buttigieg, Democratic presidential candidate

I predict the May Pete Buttigieg will be the next Democratic presidential candidate. 

I also predict that Mayor Pete will be the next president.

Now of course my second statement is perhaps more wishful thinking that what is actually going to happen but I can dream can't I?

Just imagine a fresh new face as president of the United States?  

Joe Biden?  Even though I am a resident of Uncle Joe's home state of Delaware and was born in the same state, Pennsylvania, a Biden, I cannot support him.  Why?  Because he's too old.  Yes, he's as old as I am.  A more important reason is that he is . . . . . boring. He just doesn't excite.  Sure, maybe he is the candidate that has the best chance of defeating Trump for the presidency, assuming Trump isn't impeached and removed from the presidency before next year which, remote as the possibility seems, could happen if the Senate Republicans decide to do the right thing by the country and obey their Constitutional oath of office rather than their own political interests. 

Elizabeth Warren?  I like her and think she would make a great president but there is still a load of misogyny in this country. Other countries can elect a woman president but not our country. Remember, there is a hard core forty percent who will support Trump no matter what even if he does shoot someone in broad daylight on Fifth Avenue (they would blame Obama or Hillary). 

The other Democratic presidential candidates (Harris, Castro, Klobuchar, Steyer (who?), Bennett, Yang and Corey Booker (those eyes!), it's not working folks. Save your money and withdraw like Beto O'Rourke did today.

I've heard rumors that Hillary is considering a run.  Oh please!

I can see it now, Mayor Pete at a G-7 summit with Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and French president Emmanuel Macron. What a refreshing change from that corrupt orange faced criminal that now occupies the office of the president of the United States. 

One can hope.

Another Birthday Approaching

In a little over a week I will begin my 79th year on this planet. 

I may have lived before, at times I vaguely remember an earlier life. I may live again but to tell you the truth, I'm sort of ready for the Big Rest.

I know I've addressed this theme before (life and death) but I feel the urge to talk about it again.

As I have often mentioned before, I'm not afraid of death. However, I am quite concerned how I get there. I don't want a lot of pain and I certainly do not want to be dependent on anybody.  My worst fear is having a stroke, unable to move my body but my brain is still active. I hate to even talk about that possibility. 

I also do not want a long, lingering, physically painful death. A quick demise is fine with me.

A few years ago, during one of my particularly painful encounters with a passage of one of my many kidney stones, I thought I was leaving.  I remember lying on the gurney in the emergency room, wishing I would die just to stop the pain which was unbearable. I looked at Bill standing by the wall, looking at me with tears in his eyes and knowing he was unable to help me. I teared up because I thought I was leaving him but I felt so guilty because my reason was to just stop the pain. Thank goodness the painkiller that was administered by an understanding and knowing nurse relieved my pain and I was back in the world again.

Twice in my life I've tried to commit suicide. One by stalling a bottle of aspirin (didn't work but gave me a terrific headache). And once by a car in an enclosed garage, but I couldn't go through with it because the image of my Mother at my funeral kept popping in my head. All I could think was "I couldn't do this to her."  

My Mother died in 2010 so that roadblock won't stop me if a time should come again. 

I am quite content and happy now living and loving Bill, my partner/husband of fifty-five years. I have a wonderful friend in my Canadian Travel Buddy, Pat. We are so simpatico. Have so much in common and enjoys my company and I do his.  

I have a comfortable home, nice part-time job to keep me alert and fund my frivolousness.  

I am content now but things could change on a dime. 

To prepare for that I gave my boss at work the name and phone number of the person (a former boss) to contact should I no longer be here.  I sent my former boss a copy of that e-mail which elicited an e-mail from him asking "Are you alright?"  I am alright but I am at that age now when I have to get my life in order.

I cleaned out my basement media room. I'm selling things on eBay. I have an updated will. My bills are paid.  I've lived a good life. Gravy time now folks. 

I am tired though. I need my afternoon nap which usually lasts about an hour and sometimes more.

I can hardly walk up stairs now. My legs are so weak. I can go down the stairs pretty good. I can still ride a bike but I have to be very careful disembarking. I have sleep apnea but I refuse to wear that head gear my cardiologist recommended. If I die in my sleep, that's a blessing. Two of my younger cousins (both sides of my family) have died that way in the past few years. That's the way I want to go,

In the last five years I have seen three of my friends suffer a long and painful death. Not pretty. None of them wanted that of course. My one friend and I often talked about this back in the Eighties, when I used to visit him at his new home in Delaware. As a matter of fact he is the reason I moved to Delaware.  

Now that I'm moving on to the big 80 I think about these things. I'm ready but I do plan would like to live a good fifteen or twenty more years. 

That's my thoughts this evening folks.

I'll try to post a more positive blog tomorrow!

Halloween - 2019

Me at a Halloween party at the Venture Inn, Philadelphia PA 1980

Tomorrow is Halloween. This year like last year I won't be handing out candy to the neighborhood kids. 

Our first Halloween in our new home in Delaware was in 2007. I meticulously packed up little bags of candy.  I put Halloween decorations outside.  I also put on eerie Halloween type music and awaited the trick or treaters. They came. I only recognized one neighbor kid, Luke from down the street. He was about eight years old at the time and was quite happy to receive his bag of candy. That was fun for both of us.

That night we had about five or six knocks on our door, the rest from people who don't live in our neighborhood, some was past Halloween trick or treat time. That wasn't fun. 

When I was eight years old I lived in a family friendly neighborhood in Downingtown Pennsylvania. This was in the early Fifties. I eagerly looked forward to Halloween every year. Not only so I could dress up in women's clothes (oh yes, I had that gay drag gene early, thank goodness that urge wore off) and get some free candy. Back in that time, I was poor (as were so many of us) and I liked getting free candy. Halloween was a big deal for me. I have to admit though that most of the houses I stopped at on Washington Avenue, didn't know who I was. But I did make out like a bandit with a huge bag of candy and the occasional apple (always a party pooper in the mix).  

As an adult I participated in some Halloween activity, gay theme.  No candy was involved but I did like dressing up.  My last big costume binge was as an Arab sheikh (see photo at the beginning of this blog).  

Since moving to Delaware I've dressed up a couple time, once to a costume party (which I was never invited back) and once just roaming the streets of Rehoboth Beach.  Sort of fun. 

Me as Gandolfo last year - party at my home

I still have Halloween costumes here in the house as well as Halloween decorations. Maybe some year I'll go all out again for Halloween. However, this year Halloween has just came around too soon.

I hope whatever you plan to do this year is fun for you. We all need to break the routine sometimes and just be silly. That's fun.

Me as The Joker or John Wayne Gacey (take your choice)

Children's Etiquette

One thing my Mother taught me when I was growing up was manners. She taught me (and my brothers) to be especially respectful of authority (a subject for another blog or multiple blogs) and adults. 

She taught me when an adult like my great aunt Grace (her aunt) addressed me I would acknowledge her and say "Thank you."  My Mother especially stressed the "Thank you" part.

One thing I've notice since I've been an adult is that lesson apparently isn't being taught by many adults. In fact, I do not remember once instance in my adult life when I've been introduced to a child or introduced myself that they acknowledged me by using their vocal chords or even made eye contact with me.  Occasionally I have mentioned, in a light hearted way of course God forbid I would criticize anyone parenting, to the adult the apparent rudeness of their child towards me. This also includes my many nieces and nephews (twenty four at last count) who have never acknowledged "Uncle Ronnie".  The excuse the parent gives "Oh, he's (she's) shy."  Okay, I can understand that, I was very shy when I was a toddler up and to including when I was a teenager.  I didn't lose my shyness until I was in the Army for three years. That experience will erase shyness one would have, believe me. Again, a subject for another blog. I remember one such occasion with my grand-niece Lindsay.  She was about ten years old, visiting my Mother with her father my nephew. She heard I was coming in the back door so she ran out of the front door. WHAT?  My Mother said "Oh she's shy Ronnie."  I think Lindsay is about 28 years old now. I've never had a conversation with her.  One would thing I would because we're both gay, but no. She's a Facebook friend but no conversation. But then again, lesbians are another whole story, making a point of their disdain for men, uncles or otherwise.

So what brought about all this whining from me today?  Earlier this evening I took two magazines over to my neighbor who has two little girls, aged about six and ten.  We have lived next door for thirteen years.  I've taken pictures of my neighbor (who is a school teacher) and her little girls on occasion. I collect their mail when they're on vacation. I've even supplied food during a rainstorm because the weather was too bad for mom to go out and get something to eat for her little girls. I'm consider myself a good neighbor and I'm glad I have them for neighbors because they keep a clean and neat place and the girls aren't Screamers (thank God, most little girls are Screamers which I can attest personally during our twenty-five year stay in our Pennsylvania home). 

The magazines I took over are family magazines that are of no use to me. I asked my neighbor if she would like it when I got the first magazine last month. She liked it. So when I saw their van drive up from my home office window here I gathered up my magazines and went outside to intercept her before they went into their house. For the first time I came within three feet of the ten year old.  I said "Hi Rylie!" She didn't even look at me, but just continued to take her backpack out of their van. I said again "Oh you must be Rylie".  She turned her back to me and walked into their garage. The other daughter already had made her escape through the garage. 

I walked up to the Mom and gave her the magazines. She thanked me (she's always so nice and friendly to me) and I walked away from them feeling like the creepy ugly old man neighbor. Perhaps I am being too sensitive. But perhaps not. 

I have to admit I was hurt. It's not often I get my feelings hurt.  In my seventy-seven years I've developed a pretty thick skin but every now and then someone pierces that thick skin.  Today was such a day.  But as my friend Pat often tells me, these are "First world problems."  There is a lot worse going in the world today other than the rudeness of children.  And please, don't anyone tell me "She's probably shy."  It doesn't hurt to at least acknowledge someone when they speak to you.  Ignoring them and just turning your back and walking away is not acceptable.  I don't care how good your marks are in school and how many times you appear in the local newspaper as a winning athlete, learning basic etiquette is part of growing up. I'm so thankful my Mother taught me how to be respectful to others. 

Thank you Mom.

Blood Test

This morning I had an 8:00 AM appointment for my "labs" or blood test. I get these blood tests every six months from the VA. 

I've been getting these blood tests every six months for over twenty years now from the VA. I attribute these blood test to perhaps saving my life by detecting my prostate cancer. For that I am very thankful. Prior to getting these blood tests I walked my health care tightrope without a safety net.  Prior to when I signed up for VA healthcare in 1998, it had been years (about thirty or more) since I had a blood test.  Yes, I was very lucky I didn't have a serious health problem that went undetected.  

Usually my blood test procedure goes smoothly, however not this morning. Oh no.  

I checked in at the kiosk with my VA card at about 7:45 AM for my 8 AM appointment. I took my seat and waited.  As the clocked ticked by I saw other vets come in, seated then called. No one called me. 

I decided to wait until 8:30 then I would ask.  8:30 came around and no call. I approached the window and said "Could you check to see if I'm in the system?"  The woman asked me "Did you check in?" I told her I did. She said "Did you check in the kiosk to the far right?"  Well, actually I didn't.  This is the THIRD time I've checked into the work kiosk.  

I can't get it straight. Six months flies by and I forget which kiosk to check in for my labs. This is like when I go to my cardiologist office. There are two doors to go in. One to see my doctor and the other to take tests.  Of course I ALWAYS go in the wrong door. Always.  

Is it me?  Well, yes.  

I took out my VA card and checked into the correct kiosk. In less than five minutes I was called in for my labs. 

Usually when I have the needle stuck in my arm I hardly feel it or worse, a little prick (no pun intended).  This morning when the attendant stuck the needle in it HURT.  And I mean HURT.  He had to take three vials of my precious blood.  HURT.  Even after he bandaged me up and I left, driving home, it still hurt. In fact this hurt more than I can ever remember. It's still sore, but not as much, four hours later.  

That's the start of my day folks, I apologize for the whining but I just had to vent. Now to go to work.

Have a great day everyone!