Thing's I've Never Done Meme

Time for a fun post.  I got this idea from Dr. Spo Jim.  This is a meme for things I've never done.  This one will be easy for me because there are a LOT of things I've never done.

1. I've never married
2. I've never had sex with a woman
3. I've never done coke or heroin
4. I've never been to any foreign country except Canada
5. I've never changed a flat tire
6. I've never skied, water or snow
7. I've never driven in a city
8. I've never eaten lamb
9. I've never seen a rock concert in person
10. I've never seen a Broadway show
11. I've never had a published work
12. I've never eaten clams
13. I've never been to a Nascar race or any race (horse included)
14. I've never been in a movie or TV show
15. I've never been part of a foursome
16. I've never seen a Moose in person
17. I've never sold any of my artwork
18. I've never won any race I've been in
19. I've never eaten eel
20. I've never punched a person in the face (slapped yes)
21. I've never been knocked unconscious
22. I've never killed an animal bigger than a  chicken
23. I've never met Jennifer Lopez (nor do I want to)
24. I've never met Bradley Cooper (but I do in the worst way)
25. I never went deep sea fishing
26. I've never had my appendix removed (or gall bladder)
27. I've never mucked a horse stable
28. I've never ridden a horse
29. I never rode on my father's shoulders (or any other man for that matter)
30. I never had a sister
31. I never had a child (see #2)
32. I never had a swimming pool (one lifetime goal unrealized)
33. I've never had an affair with a black or Asian man 
34. I've never had a party at my house
35. I've never owned a snake
36. I've never changed the oil in a car
37. I've never bought diamond rings for anyone but myself
38. I never learned a foreign language
39. I never learned how to play the piano
40. I never learned how to crochet (but I can do crewel and counted cross stitch)
41. I never laid a brick (but I have laid some men)
42. I never rode a tractor
43. I never went on a cruise to the Bahamas
44. I never met a person I didn't like initially
45. I never wrote a song
46. I never sky dived (or bungee jumped)
47. I never ate an insect intentionally
48. I never felt a woman's breasts (ewww!)
49. I never wore a white, silk, slinky dress
50. I never changed a diaper (yet)

There, that was easy!  Next up, a partial list of what I have done.  A censored list that is.

Liar! Liar! Pants On Fire!

Time for a meme folks.  I've not the recipes, the political rants, the "all about myself what I'm doing today" posts, now time for a meme.  I stole this one from the infamous "Anne Marie of Philly" who stole it from someone else who I forget now.

Here are Five Things About Me.  Which one is the big fat lie?

1. I have sex once a week.
2. I was a stutterer until my first grade teacher slapped me upside my head.
3. I was 27 years old the first time I "pleasured" myself. 
4. I am addicted to Doritos Blazing Buffalo and Ranch Chips.
5. I lost over $200,000 in the great stock market meltdown of 2000.

Place your bets folks!