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| July 2023 (our 59th anniversary) |
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. This will be the first Thanksgiving in sixty years that I will be without Bill. Sad times here folks.
What will I be doing? Staying here at home by myself. Don't feel sad for me, this is the way I prefer to spend my Thanksgiving. I will be will Bill's spirit tomorrow.
Bill's spirit is often with me. His spirit gives me immense comfort. He is always with me.
Maybe I'm fooling myself. Maybe I'm going crazy. Whatever, what I do know is that when Bill is with me I feel a wave of love wash over me from head to toe. Works for me.
During Bill's last year of life we often talked about how I would manage once Bill was gone. I assured him that I would be "all right." I lied of course. I was scared facing this unknown territory but I didn't want Bill to worry. Bill was so tired of living but he didn't want to leave me. I think know now that our last year together was the closest we've ever been in our nearly sixty years of living together.
This year I am so thankful for many things.
I am thankful that I can still live independently.
I am thankful that I can still drive.
I am thankful that I don't have dementia.
I am thankful that I still have my eyesight.
I am thankful that I can swallow my food.
All of those above Bill didn't have during his last few years of life.
The main thing I am thankful for is that I was able to care for Bill during his last three years of his life after his strokes on January 12th and January 14th of 2021. I was able to keep him here at his home which he loved so much and that we were able to be together.
I am one lucky man.
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! I hope all of you have someone to love and who loves you as much as Bill and I had with each other.
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| July 2019, two years before Bill's strokes |
4 comments:
Happy Thanksgiving Ron---I decided to bake a turkey---It's a 12-pound turkey from Sprouts---One of those healthy ones ---I haven't fixed a turkey in years---I will freeze the leftovers---I have a good rub to place on the turkey---That is combined and ready to go---The rest of the meal will be homemade biscuits, rice, and vegetables---I can make a good stuffing and homemade cranberry relish but I didn't feel like going ALL out---I did realize I forget a couple of potatoes for mashing but it was not a deal breaker---For dessert ice cream over pecan pie-Sprouts---Eggnog-Low Fat-from a local dairy and coffee will go with the dessert---I did bake about 6 miniature loaves of pumpkin bread with a crumb topping last Sunday---I gave one to the president of my HOA---I also brought a few slices to the resident I visit on hospice at a local care facility---Along with Americanos for our visit---I visit her on Tuesdays---Other than baking a turkey it will be low key---I haven't been out for Thanksgiving in years---The gym is closed Thursday and open on Friday from 7 AM -12PM---I will return on Saturday for my 4-mile walk on the treadmill----I did go today and when I was winding down around noon all the medical students starting coming in---Usually during normal hours the gym is pretty quite except for us regulars---Enjoy your Thanksgiving---Why not go for a walk in the neighborhood----Best of health---Victor
This is a lovely tribute to Bill, Ron. The holidays are always the worst, I've found. I got up this morning, and it was snowing. My first thought was to call my mom in Florida, and she's been gone 2 years now. We do the best we can and treasure our memories.
Victor,
Good to hear from you on this Thanksgiving Day morning! I loved reading your description of what you're going to cook this Thanksgiving Day. I haven't made a Thanksgiving dinner in years either. If I'm around next year, I think I will go all out. Pat should be down here by then. Even though he's a vegan manage something. I love roast turkey though. I can freeze the rest. Today I'l having some that I froze from last year. I had some last night and it was still tasty. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving Vic!
Ron
Elle,
So nice to hear from you on this Thanksgiving morning! You're right, holidays the worst. I'm here in my house by myself. I was invited to a Thanksgiving dinner at a friend's house in Pennsylvania but that is two and a half hours away and it's raining lightly this morning. I wouldn't travel that far any way even if it was a beautiful fall day but especially not in the rain. I think next year I will host a Thanksgiving dinner, continent on me still being here.
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving Elle.
Ron
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