Dawn - My Cat Whisperer Niece

My niece Dawn and two very lucky kittens

Dawn is my first and oldest niece.  She is the daughter of my brother Isaac.  Dawn rescues kittens. 

My brothers John (left), me and Isaac (right) and my niece Dawn with her daughter Kandace - December 1987

She probably wouldn't like me writing about here like this so that's why I'm to using her last name.  Dawn is selfless, she goes about her life's mission of rescuing these poor kittens that area abandoned and sick.  She nurses them back to health and finds homes for them.  No, she isn't one of their weird Cat Ladies.

Dawn with her sister Karen - my birthday 1974 - one of the best pictures I ever took - 40 years ago!

I am very proud of Dawn and her caring nature.  In addition to her full time activity of rescuing and bringing back to health abandoned kittens, she also has her own child care business which she runs out of her home.  

From Dawn's Facebook page- she's always looking for new homes for her kittens and she finds them!

So where did Dawn inherit this gene for rescuing kittens?  Well, maybe her dad (Isaac) ha something to do with it.  Below is a picture I took of my brothers who found some kittens forty years ago in a manufacturing plant where our father used to work.  One of those cats grew up to be "Bobby", my first and only pet cat.  I would love to have one now but you know that story, Bill hates cats.  But maybe one day.

My brothers John and Isaac with abandoned kittens they found in a manufacturing plan we lived near - 1953

Me and "Bobby" - 1954

The last couple of nights at the hotel I had to deal with some very difficult people. The election results of a few weeks ago have ushered into power a group of people who are not interested in you or me but only their corporate owners and for the next two years they will do everything in their power to make life more difficult for us common folks who work for a living.  It is at times like this that I look at people, people like my niece who do good.  

Dawn with her brother (Isaac, III) and sister (Karen) December 10, 1977

I was tempted to write a blog posting this morning bitching about these recent developments but I said "No Ron, try to think of something positive and write about that.  If you write about more negativity you're only going to sink lower."  So folks, here is my "puff piece" today.  Granted, Dawn is my niece but she is one of the Good People in this country and this world.  God bless them.  Without people like her what hope is there for the rest of us?

Dawn with her son (Chase) and daughter (Kandace) 2007

Now there, did I leave you smiling after reading this blog post about my wonderful niece Dawn?  

"Ain't You Tired Miss Hilly?"

My friend Bill B. when it comes to marriage equality - "What's to prevent you from marrying your pet?"

Yesterday, while having a casual conversation on the phone with my longtime (since grade school) conservative (almost all of my good friends are of the conservative ilk) friend I was again reminded of the Brick Wall of Ignorance that will always be there between us.

Generally we stay away from politics (as I mentioned before, he is of the ditto-head, brainwashed Faux News ilk) and religion (yes, he is of the "I'll pray for you" ilk - "unless you accept Jesus Christ as your savior you're GOING TO HELL" ilk) and just discuss our every growing medical maladies (he also had a stent inserted into his penis a few months ago).  However, yesterday the conservation veered towards marriage equality or as he prefers to call it SAME SEX MARRIAGE.  While he has known Bill and I for years and likes us as we like him, he doesn't APPROVE (like who asked him?) of that word MARRIAGE applied to our union.  Here is his argument (are you sitting down?  This is hard to believe from an otherwise reasonably intelligent and rational person)  He says:  "Well Ron, once you have people of the same sex marrying what's to prevent them from marrying their pet?" 

Oh here we go folks, the old Slippery Slope Argument.  My first reaction was "Bill (that's his name) do you realize you just insulted me?  Do you realize just how ridiculous your argument is?  Do you realize that you're trivializing my union with (my) Bill?"  

He doesn't answer my questions directly but responds with "Ron, there are people who believe this!"  WHAT?  Of course there are people who believe that once people of the same sex marry then they will want to marry their pets, cars, and bookends.  I asked him "Don't you remember what happened to your former Senator Rick "Man on beast" Santorum when he made the same slippery slope argument?  Again, he ignored my direct question and continued to make the lame assed argument "Ron, there ARE people who believe this!" 

Honest to God folks, I felt like throwing up.  I wanted to hang up the phone.  My friend, my longtime friend who I've shared many a good time with was espousing this Faux News/Right Wing NutRepublican/Fundamentalist religion……crap.

Here I'm having this ridiculous and insulting "conversation" with my longtime friend, on the same day that my beloved sister-in-law got in a snit because I posted a picture on my Facebook account (that was taken in 1979) of my Mother getting her hair combed by my niece (er daughter) that showed her daughter in a long, frilly conservative (yes, my sister-in-law is also of the same conservative, religious ilk) dress.  I gently poked fun at my niece and said "What is that you're wearing?"  Well folks, that set off a firestorm that resulted in me receiving a letter from my sister-in-law informing me that I had "hurt" her (geez, RELAX- by the way I did send her an e-mail apologizing for the unintended hurt and I removed the offending Facebook posting) and then she gave me a dig about my "lifestyle."  Well, well. Here we go again.  Two people I love and respect coming out in the same day showing their true colors, that they view me as "less than."  

I'll be honest with you folks, I was actually sick to my stomach yesterday.  I didn't get to sleep until 3 am this morning.  I know I shouldn't let things like this bother me but they do.  Another thing that bothers me is the knowledge that all my Facebook postings and this blog is being monitored by those who are looking for the least little thing for which to beat me over the head with their sanctimonious  cudgel.  RELAX FOLKS!  If you don't like what I'm saying, DON'T READ MY BLOG.  DON'T READ MY FACEBOOK ACCOUNT.

As regular readers of this blog know, there are couple FORMER friends (they discontinued the friendship, if there ever was one) when they read something in my blog (I'm such a terrible person don't you know?) they THEY didn't approve of.  One of my blogger friends left a comment on my blog yesterday to the effect that these people who are so quick to criticize and complain never write anything on their Facebook account or blog but they're out there trolling the blogs and Facebook accounts just looking for something to be offended about. Get a life.

I don't know what upset me the most yesterday.  Inadvertently upsetting my beloved sister-in-law (who has done a lot for our family and who I much respect) or my horse blinders, head-in-the-sand friend.  I think perhaps it is my friend with the horse blinders.  I think my sister-in-law knows that I wouldn't intentionally hurt her but she knows me well enough to know that I sometimes go overboard with the kidding without fully considering the repercussions. Even though I thought her complaint was petty and her cheap shot at my "lifestyle" was beneath her, I can understand her situation.  She prefers to remain private and here I just shoved her privacy out in the open with my Facebook account posting (which was really about my Mother, not her but I guess in future postings I'll have to blot out her face as I do my two former friends who big girl panties get in a twist whenever they see their mugs posted on my blog - group shots fellas, group shots)!  

Me with former friends (I'm a terrible person) who wish to remain anonymous - old gay guys still in the closet except for the only one with balls (me) who isn't afraid of being publicly identified as a gay man - I'm not ashamed of being gay and don't feel the need to hide my sexual identity lest I offend someone

Perhaps what dismays and saddens me the most and saddens me is my longtime friend.  The knowledge that he truly believes that because Bill and I got married and now have the respect and legal protections that he and his straight ilk take for granted, that he considers in his heart considers me and Bill "less than."  That once the flood gates are open then "what's to prevent people from marrying their pets?"  It truly saddens me that otherwise reasonable, intelligent adults, and especially friends of mine who have known me most of my life, still consider me "less than."  They still consider me as damaged goods, some THING to be tolerated.  

At times like this I remember the line from "The Help."  Aibileen Clark (he black maid and character Viola Davis played) says to Miss Hilly (the consistently racist Southern white woman she works for).  Aibileen, exhausted and tired from living with the racism, finally confronts her racist employer, Miss Hilly and says "Ain't you tired, Miss Hilly?"

And that's my question to all my so called friends and relatives who believe in their heart that I am "less than" they are.  "Ain't you tired Miss Hilly, ain't you tired?"

I know one thing, I'm tired of it.

The Good, Bad and Ugly

The snow was swirling around outside just a few minutes ago.  Earlier, when I went out to the mail box to leave a Christmas card that didn't make my mass mailing yesterday, sleet and rain was falling around my ears.  Not a nice day!  

I'm sitting at my computer desk now, trying to catch up on my backlog of 600 or so e-mails in my AOL account.  I can never seem to stay caught up on that AOL account.  I've had it since the beginning of time I got my first computer. I probably should dump it but I'm a creature of habit.  Just this morning I was looking at my almost $200 monthly Verizon bill and doing my Wylie Coyote eye popping maneuver looking at my $59.99 a month for my land line.  I still haven't bitten the bullet on canceling that phone that I obviously don't need.  It's of more use to the multiple charities and tele marketers who use it way more than I ever will use it.  But, as I said earlier I am a creature of habit.  But……$59.99 a month for what?  Maybe this year is the year I take the BIG STEP.

Not a good morning folks.  I just received an e-mail from my sister-in-law informing me that I had hurt her feelings with an old photo that I posted on FB.  It wasn't my intention to hurt her feelings but I did by inadvertently mocking the way she dressed her daughters back then.  That was her business and I had no business making light of the way she dressed them, however unintentional.  I love and respect my sister-in-law a great deal and she has done a lot for our family and I really stepped in it this morning.  I feel awful.  I did apologize but as they say "The damage is done."  

Sometimes I just can't avoid those "damage is done" moments.  That's like the time a few years ago I made a judgement why the male masseur at the hotel didn't want to give me a massage.  I was properly berated by hotel management for posting my judgement on my blog.  Again, even after I apologized I got the "well, the damage was done."  Sorry folks!  Just living here.

You know, you go through life trying to avoid stepping on toes and getting people out of whack but sometimes it seems if you just get out of bed in the morning you're going to offend somebody.  

My morning started off with reading a blog stating that I was a gossip.  GUILTY!  Yes, I am and I do UNDERSTAND gossip.  It's called information.  Now if one wants to make a distinction between malicious gossip (untruthful or hurtful) and just general information - that's called living folks.  No apologies necessary.  I don't live my life in a cave. If you do, that's fine with yourself but don't put that on me.  I'm a different animal.  

So there I have my morning folks.  I'm a gossip who also posts hurtful pictures on Facebook.  There is one FORMER friend who reads this blog regularly (or so I hear but I believe it) who has gotten his big girl panties in a twist because of certain information and photos that I've posted on MY BLOG.  I have no doubt he's smugly nodding his head now and thinking "Uh huh, uh huh."  

And that folks is the way it goes this morning.  Bad Boy Ron misbehaving again.  I'll be back tomorrow, and no doubt offend someone else again by being myself and posting about my life.  You know what folks?  That's me.  The Good, Bad and Ugly.

Annual Road Trip South - Day Four

Hampton Inn, Helen, Georgia

What a difference a day makes.  Today was wonderful.  

We left Marion, North Carolina this morning.  Bill and I said our "goodbye's" to my good cousin Bob and his wife Marie.  They just made our two days in Marion so enjoyable.  They were the perfect antidote to the hateful remarks that my other distant cousin (his great grandmother and my grandmother were brother and sister) made to me on Sunday.  I think I've gone through the five stages of grief over that incident:  

Denial 
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

I'm at the "acceptance" stage now.  I knew he will never change as many won't in this country.  They will go to their grave believing that it is their God given right to discriminate, harass and threaten gay  people.  I have to tell you though, I was shocked and a chill went through my whole body when he said those hateful words to me.  But we left that area of the country this morning and I doubt if I'll ever be back.

Now for the good news.  It was a fairly short drive to Greenville, South Carolina where my brother lives.  I wanted to leave my Mother's jewelry with my brother's wife to distribute to her daughters and granddaughters.  

Me and my "baby brother" in front of his garage in Greenville, SC

Bill and I had a short visit with my brother and his wife.  We went out to lunch with John (my brother) at the Golden Corral.  One thing I notice about the south, they sure do eat good.  Lots of buffets with LOTS of food, and GOOD food.  The only buffets we have in Delaware is the one Chinese food place and who knows how old that food is.  

Will in Greenville I purchased a Garmin 3565 GPS, Voice Activated device.  My cousin Bob suggested that we get one and am I ever glad.  All the stress just disappeared for our road trip.  Bill and I usually end up fighting when turns are missed.  With this fancy, dancy GPS device, those mishaps are now going to be few and far in between.  Thank God.  

After our visit to my brother and his wife, Bill headed towards Toccoa to visit his old boyhood haunts.  Unfortunately, his old neighborhood has gone downhill drastically.  And I mean BIG TIME DOWN HILL.  The lady who now lives in Bill's old family house invited him in to look around.  That was very gracious of her.  Of course the inside of the house looks nothing like it did when Bill lived there.  And it looks a lot smaller, but doesn't everything when you go back to it as an adult remembering what it was like when you were a kid?

Bill's old home on Alexandra Street in Toccoa, Georgia

Now here is the really good part of the day.  We planned to stay in the area for two days until we head back home.  But there aren't any decent hotels in or around Toccoa.  So I put a search in my new fancy fancy GPS and asked for a Hampton Inn.  The Lady in the GPS came up with a Hampton Inn in Helen, Georgia; about 34 miles away.  Okay.  That was a too awful distance to travel.

Bill on the street outside of his old home - he says it "has changed a lot."

So we follow the GPS instruction and we're taken to a beautiful little theme town for tourist.  This town is called "Helen" and is build like a Bavarian village.  Bill loves Germany!  He was stationed there while he was in the Army.  And here is a replica right here only 34 short miles from Toccoa!

Now the story gets even better.  The Hampton Inn we're staying at is also built like a Bavarian house. And our rooms!  Wow!  The best I've ever had, ever!  I actually have a suite for under $100.00 a night.  Bill and I both have suites (we sleep not only in separate beds but separate rooms).  My suite (as well as Bill's) has a fireplace, a living room, a kitchenette, a big whirlpool in the bathroom, a king size bed, two flat screened TV's (one in the living room and one in the bedroom) and a beautiful view of the mountains right outside our windows.  And even better.......we can walk out of the hotel down a real sidewalk to all the shops and restaurants.  No getting in our car and figuring out how to get across the interstate and those butterfly turn roads just to get something to eat.  This town even has an Old Time Photo shop! Yes, I am going down tomorrow and get my photo taken.  This evening I had my photo taken in one of those old time photo booths from the Fifties. What great fun!  

Street scene in Helen, Georgia

After dinner at the Heidleburg House (a tasteless hamburger but great french fries; I opted not to get a big traditional German dinner because I had already made a pig out of myself for lunch at the Golden Corral).  However, I did get the apple strudel and yes, I ATE THE WHOLE THING even though it looked like it was a family serving. 
Memo to Ron: eat less tomorrow.  

It's late now.  I was on the phone with Apple Support.  I was in a Catch-22 with my passwords.  don't ask.  It's straightened out now.

Oh, one more thing.  I took a long soak in the Jacuzzi tonight.  Wow.  Was that ever relaxing but after I got out I kept sweating and sweating.  I had to take another shower and I was still sweating.  And I think I'm down to my last set of underwear. I may have to get some quarters and use the hotel's laundry facilities.

I'm already planning on coming back here next year.  Bill can visit his hometown again and I can "get away from it all" by staying in this lovely suite of rooms nestled in the Georgia mountains.  Too much of our vacation is spent driving on the road.  When we leave here Friday we're faced with a 12 hour drive of about 645 miles.  We can't make that in one day so we'll have to stay over somewhere halfway in between.  But we're definitely coming back here next year.  I like this place!