"Special Rights"

Nothing gets my blood boiling more than conservatives using the term "special rights" when referring to gays and lesbians seeking EQUAL RIGHTS.

Watch and listen to this interview by CNN's Don Lemon (who happens to be an out gay, good for him - hear that Anderson?) and the Family Research Council's Tony Perkins.  About halfway through the interview Don shows Tony a short video of a gay man being viscously attacked on a street corner for no other reason that for the fact he is gay.  Don asks Tony Perkins what is the Family Research's position on such an attack.  Listen to Tony's response.  He uses the right wing flash word "special rights" when referring to gays and lesbians seeking EQUAL RIGHTS.

I'm sorry folks but every time I hear this lie from an otherwise, seemingly intelligent person like Tony Perkins, I wonder how many others in this country think the way this holier than thou homophobe bigot thinks.  Does anyone really think that people like Tony Perkins actually care for that gay man being beaten on that street corner?

Also listen to Perkins linking homosexuality to promiscuity, referring no doubt to the gay man on the street corner who was probably cruising.  Perhaps Mr. Perkins thinks that gay man deserved his beating.  I'll let the reader decide.

We've come a long way folks in this country towards EQUAL RIGHT for gays and lesbians but we still have a long way to go as long as so called "decent" people like Tony Perkins is in a position of power and influence.  The Journey is far from finished.

"Don't Ask Don't Tell" Repeal: This Day Has Finally Come

Well said. I look forward the day when my partner of 46 years and I can get officially married. We both served in the military during the bad old witch hunting days. Progress is being made because we never thought we would see the day in our lifetime that gays and lesbians would be accepted in the military. Now anything is possible.
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It Gets Better

Solitary figure on the boardwalk in Rehoboth Beach, this morning.

The past few weeks several gay teen suicides have been reported.  These gay teens were victims of bullying and harassment by their school classmates and neighbors.  


Joel Burns, a city councilman from Fort Worth Texas made a statement on October 12th during a city council meeting stating that when he was a teenager he was also subjected to bullying.  He stated that he started to question his self worth and thought about suicide.  He went on to further state that he couldn't do that to his parents (commit suicide) and got through his bad period of life during his high school years.


I went to school during the Fifties.  I knew I was different.  I knew I shouldn't tell anyone about the way I felt, especially my family.  However, a few of my classmates did suspect because I was at times called "queer" and "fairy."  The epithet "faggot" hadn't come into universal use yet (that's how old I am).

Me during my "sissy" period in high school, before I learned to butch it up.

I especially remember one time during lunch period in ninth grade (middle school).  I usually ate lunch by myself but on this one occasion I sat down at a table with another group of guys in my class who I liked.  I especially like one guy but I had never talked to him or even introduced myself to him.  I thought this would be a good occasion to try and make friends with this group of guys.


I had already gotten my tray of food and was sitting at an empty table by myself.  I saw the group of guys, including the guy who I really like, coming my way.   As they passed my table, the guy I really liked paused and said to the other guys "Look at the fairy eating by himself.  No one else wants to eat with him.  I WONDER WHY?"  Then they all laughed and sat at the next table.  There were more things said but I couldn't understand what they were saying because of my immense embarrassment.  Then someone would say something again, and they would all laugh.  I was sure they were laughing at me.  I was sure everyone in the cafeteria knew "my secret."  


I don't remember what happened after that other than I changed my lunch period.  I avoided those guys as much as I could.  I wasn't bothered by any of them any more, especially the guy who I liked.  He apparently was the ring leader.  He didn't bother me because his family moved the next year and he no longer went to my school.


In the years since I was occasionally harassed and bullying was attempted.  I won't go into the details here (that's for my book) but what I will say is that I put an end to it with my fists.  A couple of good punches on three different occasions and I was no longer bullied. Of course I know I was very lucky not to have been seriously hurt or hurt someone else.  I was lucky.


I never, NEVER felt like committing suicide.  Again, I was very lucky. My only concern was how to get through school and the Army in one piece without being injured or killed because I was "different."  Ironically, I was never sexually active (I didn't even know what to do) until I was 21 years old and out of the Army.  


I think the reason I was harassed at school was that I was somewhat effeminate ("sissy" was the word used back then.)  I learned to "de sissify" myself.  That's probably what saved me, especially during my Army years.  During basic training I almost killed a fellow trainee who was bullying me.  Again, I was very lucky I didn't end up in the stockade for going after my harasser with a broom handle.  My company commander realized what was happening and told the man (Rondeau, I'll never forget his name) to leave me alone or else HE WAS GOING TO END UP IN THE STOCKADE.  Again, I was very lucky. 

Me, 1960.  Arny basic training.  

Not all teenagers were as lucky as I was.  That's why this epidemic of bullying has to stop and it begins with the people in authority, from the top on down.  That would be President Obama (stop enforcing the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy), Congress, law enforcement, local officials, teachers, and parents.  


THE BULLYING HAS TO STOP.


To all gay teenagers who feel trapped and see no way out.  IT DOES GET BETTER.  You're in a much better position that I was in when I was growing up in the Fifties.  You can go to authorities and report being bullied and harassed.  


There will always be those in our society who bully those who they perceive weak, timid and mild.  I was perceived that way.  I refused to let it happen to me.  You can do the same.  Do not turn their hatred into self-hatred.  Throw it back in their face.  


Even at this late stage in my life there are still attempts to bully me.  Recently the husband of a co-worker of mine didn't like the fact that I posted a video of two men dancing the tango on my Facebook page.  He told me "Give it a break."  I confronted him and asked him what he meant by that remark.  He said "Ron I always considered you one of the good gays."  Uh huh.  Does this sound familiar?  Sort of like those Negroes and the good Negroes.  I told he that he sounded a bit homophobic.  When he got that response from me, a "good gay", he went off the deep end.  All his homophobia came out in full bloom. Here we go again, the civilian version of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell".  


The bullying will never stop.  When it happens, it must be confronted.  That is the only way it will end.  Because it is true, life does get better.  I know, I'm living it now.  

I still like cats