Saturday, July 26, 2014

Toby Maguire - Douchebag

Toby Maguire - Asshole

A few days ago I was reading an article in Vanity Fair about a former cocktail waitress who became a popular poker hostess to the stars.  Her name is Molly Bloom.  I like reading articles like this because they sometimes give you an inside view of what some of our popular celebrities are really like, once they're not in front of the camera.

We all form an opinion of celebrities when we see them in the movies, TV or other formats.  I like to play a game with myself to see if my initial impression of a celebrity's personality is the real celebrity.  The celebrity I'm talking about now is the Toby Maguire, Mr. Spiderman.  

I don't know why but from the first time I saw Mr. Maguire in a movie, "Ice Storm", I formed a negative opinion of him.  


I don't know that my impression had anything to do with his role in "Ice Storm".  If I remember correctly the character he played was a sympathetic character.  Mostly I remember those BIG eyes of his which seemed so empty.  Know the old adage "The eyes are the window to the soul?"  I looked in Mr. Maguire's eyes and saw . . . . . . . nothing.  Empty.  Void.  Dead.  Yes, that's it . . . DEAD EYES.

Well, some people liked him.  In fact a LOT of people liked him because he went on to star in the very lucrative "Spiderman" movies.  I saw one, his ass looked good in those tights when he stooped but then, that was probably a stunt double, knowing Mr. Maguire as I do now.

Toby went on to marry a Jennifer Meyer, daughter of Ronald Meyer, currently vice chairman of NBC Universal and was previously the President and CEO of Universal Studios. Yes, he married the boss's daughter.  They have two children. Their first child, a daughter is named "Ruby Sweetheart Maguire" (how cute).  Their second child, a son, is named "Otis Tobias Maguire" (another very distinctive name which this kid will have to explain his whole life but what the hey, they're celebrities, they're special.) 

Mr. and Mrs. Dead Eyes Toby Maguire

So I'm reading this article by Molly Bloom, poker hostess to the stars.  She recounts how Toby is a great player, usually wins (millions of dollars), is a lousy tipper and a poor loser.  No surprise here, this was my impression of Vacant Eyes.

Then she recounts an episode in which Toby won over a million dollars and was actually going to tip her with a thousand dollar chip.  But first . . . . he want to know if she could "bark like a seal"

for her  tip.  Sort of reminds me of a FORMER (and now departed) friend, who used to join us on our Sunday night gay dinners at the Purple Parrot in Rehoboth Beach.  At the end of one of our festive get togethers, the waiter left the bill for our repast on our table.  One of the guys (probably me) looked at the bill and started to split it up, who owed what.  My former friend, (let's call him "Al", which actually was his name but I'm to using a last name so privacy is preserved) figured out what he owed and put his share of the bill in the common pot.  However, he did not add a tip.  He said "I'll take care of this myself."  When the waiter came by to pick up the check with the money, Al said to the waiter "Here's your tip" and proceeded to stuff a five dollar bill down the front of his pants to his crotch and then give the waiter his lizardly smile.

We all cringed.  Bad taste.  Not funny.  But Al (who was very short) thought he was being soooooo cool.  The waiter looked at him to see if he was serious.  Al repeated "If you want your tip you're going to have to DIG for it."  The waiter said "Keep it."  

Al:  Douchebag

So here is Mr. Big Time, Married to the boss's daughter, millionaire many times over and wants the poker hostess to "bark like a seal" for her tip.

Toby Maguire:  Douchebag

Below is he urban definition of a douchebag:

Stronger than a "douche", which is basically an idiot who doesn't know any better. Mr. Maguire knows better, he's just arrogant.  He has money, fame and celebrity and wants everyone to kiss his ass.  

So again, my first impression was right on the mark.  

You know the sad thing, there are so many celebrities who are douchebags.  There are a few who aren't but I think to get to the point where you're making millions because through some talent, being at the right place at the right time and mostly just plain dumb luck; I think if you're a nice guy (or woman) you won't survive long.  Basically you have to be a douchebag or at least an asshole to stay "on top."  

Toby Maguire - short - usually the short guys are the biggest douchebags

In my job as a hotel front desk clerk in this very small town on the east coast of Delaware, which just happens to be the "First Town in the First State - a distinction no other town has in this country - I've encountered and met a few celebrities and minor celebrities.  I have to say, every one of them in person was exactly my first impression of them.  

You are who you are and you cannot hide your true character.  At least not with me.  

So there is my "unload" rant for the day.  It sickened me when I read how Maguire treated that poker hostess.  I hope by posting this blog entry on my oh so modest blog that never seems to increase in readership the last seven years, that I can help to  contribute to the knowledge of the public, who is responsible for Toby Maguire's good fortune, to no longer support Toby Maguire in any movie role.  He already his his millions.  He'll have a good life but hopefully he won't be able ever again to humiliate someone else who is just trying to make living.  

See here for the full article.


  1. Anonymous1:07 PM

    Hi, Ron. If the history of what you’ve had to say about ‘celebrities’ on your blog is something to go by, you generally don’t like them. (I know you couldn’t break yourself of calling Celine Dion “old horse face” if you could, and I’m sure you don’t intend to stop ;-)

    But, even though Tobey Maquire apparently seems to be a certified douchebag: “Toby Maguire - short - usually the short guys are the biggest douchebags”?

    “Usually the short guys are the biggest douchebags”? Really?

    And even though you’ll probably consider me a douchebag for this comment, I’m actually five eleven;-)

    1. domanidave,
      Actually, the record says Toby Douchebag is 5' 9". I stand corrected. Douchebags come in all sizes. Some of the biggest douchebags both literally and figuratively are NBA basketball players. But then again, the owner of the L A Clippers, Donald Sterling (not his real name by the way, big surprise) is a major douchebag. I think what happens is that many of these guys and gals, once they get that obscene amount of money and fame, hubris sets in and they think their shit doesn't stink. Well, news flash, it does. And anytime one of these phonies is exposed for the douchbag they really are (and it might cost them some money and respect), I'm all for it. Ever since I heard the parable of the boy who cried the emperor has no clothes, I look for and enjoy exposing these cruel people who abuse their wealth and fame. I would like to think that Toby Douchebag is major pissed off right now but I doubt it. These people live in their own world of self-justification of their cruelty. One thing remains true about any kind of celebrity whether they be in the entertainment field, politics, literary, science, religion, business or whatever. They are no better than you or I. And they know it thus that's why a douchbag like Toby Maguire felt it necessary to humiliate and dominate that poker hostess. I'm just glad he has been exposed for the creep that he is in real life.
      Thanks for the comment Dave. Always appreciated . . . . . well most of the time anyway. :)

  2. Anonymous4:01 PM

    It's a shame when these people forget who they are and where they came from, and then think they can just be douche bags.

    Peace <3

    1. Jay,
      It never ceases to amaze me why some people, who have been very successful in life with money and celebrity start to think they're God-like and can do or say anything they want. I'm curious as to what Toby Douchebag will do now to try and reverse all the bad publicity. He has millions and you can bet he's got his public relations people working on the "problem", which is actually the way he is . . . . a cheap, rude, bastard. Actually, he really is a bastard for real . . . . no surprise (parents weren't married when he was born).

  3. Nothing wrong with Toby Maguire - Douchebag. Lots of people have hyphenated last names now.

  4. yep, that's a douchebag all right.

    1. Anne Marie,
      I just remembered, I know some NICE short people. Whoops! Foot in mouth. My apologies. :)

  5. Ron

    That kind of behaviour is repulsive. Maybe there's more to the story that we don't know. But that story trumps any other pathetic action I've heard of late.



    1. Pat,
      There isn't more to the story. It's pretty straight forward. Toby Maguire wanted her to bark ilke a seal for her tip. He was serious and pissed when she didn't do it. He is a disgusting human being. My first impression was correct.

  6. Hey, Ron. I'm 6'1" and I know you're taller than me. I think we can both attest to the fact that SOME short, insignificant guys are indeed douchebags. Toby Maguire is one of many Hollywood celebs who inexplicably became famous with minimal talent or looks. I've met some incredibly nice celebrities, but my many years in Hollywood have convinced me that famous douchebags are rampant.........

    By the way, I consider anyone under 6' to be a midget (I'm being a nasty bitch - - but sometimes I enjoy it)

    1. Jon,
      Some of the famous people I've met at the front desk at the hotel where I work were very nice, down to earth and genuine. Unfortunately,it is those few who so often ruin it for other celebrities by their arrogant and cruel behavior. I haven't actually met one of those bad celebrities . . . yet. Probably never will. But when I hear the diva actions of Madge and Jo Lo, and Mariah Carey, and even Reese Witherspoon "Do you now WHO I AM?" when she was being arrested for drunk driving, I tend to think all celebrities are egotistical asswipes but I know I'm probably wrong.
      Thanks for your comment Jon.

  7. Oh dear. That's pricked my balloon - not that I was a specially GREAT fan of T.M., but it's disappointing when you find that someone assumed to be a decent sort isn't one. Unforgiveable behaviour. I must be more discerning in future.
    Btw: I thought 'Ice Storm' was a near-great film, not that this young man (as he was then) had much to do with my opinion but as an all-round, entertaining and absorbing adult film I thought it very fine.

  8. Ray,
    I was also surprised to learn of Maguire's totally reprehensible behavior. I probably shouldn't have been because I've always felt uneasy about him, never quite comfortable with his screen presence. I've always felt there was something sinister lurking beneath those saucer wide blue eyes which always seems so dead to me. I too liked the film "Ice Storn", it left a last impression with me. I like those "suburban" type family dysfunction (all families are dysfunctional) movies.
    Last night I saw "Magic Mike". I wasn't prepared to be impressed but I was. Not with all the male flesh flung in my face but with the story (which was actually only a slight variation on the "boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy get girl" story). I liked the unconventional script and the unfamiliar actors (nice to see new faces instead of the same old tired ones) and the production values, slim but interesting. Did you review "Magic Mike?"

    Thanks as always for your comment Ray.


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