Monday, February 10, 2014

When the Bloom Is Off The Rose



I am a hopeless romantic.  There, I've said it.  I've been warned so many times "Ron, be careful."  But I just can't help myself.  When someone treats me with kindness and I am physically attracted to them, I fall down that well of romanticism.  I fall in love.

During my too many years taking up space on this earth, I have been involved in more than a few romantic escapades.  Oh, now you Puritan brainwashed traditionalists, don't get your hackles up.  Bill and I have always had a realistic relationship.  No more need be said on this subject.

But back to my big weakness, when I fall in love I go big time.  It's not that often that I fall in love but when I do, watch out.  No holds barred Ron.

Again, I am just too passionate,  too romantic.  I wish I could be cynical and hard but it's not my nature.  I have to be who I am.  That's another one of my weaknesses, I'm too vulnerable. 

No matter how many safeguards I erect I always seem to let myself open for disappointment.  Maybe it's me.  Yes, it is me.  I'm too smothering   

I remember one particularly painful end to a relationship.  I asked him "What happened?"  He said "I don't know, I just fell out of love."    In other words, he just didn't care anymore.  That particular relationship (for lack of a better word) happened and ended in 1980, thirty four years ago.  Believe it or not, I've never completely gotten over it.  Last year he sent me an e-mail.  He wanted a copy of photo that I had taken of him.  I was glad to accommodate him.  You know me and my thousands of photos.  Of course I haven't heard from him since.  No surprise.

From that time until this time I've done pretty good protecting myself from the Big Hurt.  I just hope it's not happening again.  



Back to the good stuff tomorrow folks.  I just had to get this off of my chest.  Hope I wasn't too cryptic in this post.

7 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Anne Marie,
      Just a little bump in the road. I'm too passionate. It's a problem I've had all my life. I usually turn off people with my passion. It's my weakness.
      Ron

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  2. A visit to your local shelter with a pocket of "treats" will brighten up your day and take away some of the heart ache.

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    Replies
    1. Roger,
      Good suggestion! That's usually what I do, occupy myself with a good deed rather than wallow in self-pity which gets me nowhere. Only takes me lower. Part of life that I have to deal with. At least I do enjoy those times of true passion, for which I am thankful.
      Ron

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  3. Ron,
    There is nothing wrong with passion, you have to have it in order for your heart to open and allow love to enter or extend to someone else. This to me is a part of living a full life that will always include up's and down's, joy and heartache, each occurrence molding and shaping us throughout our short time on earth. I think we can all say we've been there, done that. The bloom might be off the rose but that's only because you stopped and smelled the rose to begin with.
    Jack

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  4. I don't envy you on this one.

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    Replies
    1. Dr. Spo,
      No heartbreak here but the passion is more on my side, as is usually the case. But that's always been my lot in life. I'm just happy that I can love and get it in return. We're still going pretty strong and I don't think that will change but there has been a shifting of the teutonic plates.
      Ron

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