Sunday, October 20, 2013

Do I Have a Guardian Angel?



Yes, I believe I do.  

From my earliest memory, when I was about 3 1/2 years old I remember "I'm here and I'm going to do THIS (life) again."  I definitely remember I had a feeling of returning.

I don't remember exactly when it was that I realized I was not alone in my renewed Life Journey.  I do remember the comfort I felt attending summer Bible school.  I even received a certificate of perfect attendance in 1948, when I was a mere six years old.  A few years later that comfort that I felt from the church was destroyed by a hate filled rant by a Pentecostal preacher who, face red and purple with rage and foam at his mouth, screamed at his congregation at which my Aunt Peg took me one Sunday when I was twelve years old "You're all sinners!  You were born in sin, you live in sin and you will die in sin! You must repent or spend eternity in the everlasting fires of Hell!" 




At first I was confused.  I thought: 

  1. "I didn't ask to be born and I didn't make a choice to be a sinner."  
  2. "Why is this preacher screaming at me?"  
  3. "Why does he hate me?"
  4. "Does God hate me because I was born in sin?"
  5. "What can I do to make this man and God stop hating me?"


Then came the coup de tat, I knew I was "different" (homosexual) and I knew I was surely damned even before I had a chance at life.

As I matured I realized that organized religion was for the great bulk of people who chose, in my opinion, the easy way for spirituality.  They didn't have to think, just follow man-made instructions on how to think and live their lives.  I don't criticize their choice but that is the way I see it.  I don't go that way.  If there is a God, he/she gave me FREE WILL (as the "religious" are so fond of quoting) and I'm using it.  Now rest assured folks, I'm being very careful here not to step on anyone's religious toes.  I know everyone has their own beliefs, and some of those who follow organized religion tend to get very defensive and huffy puffy if one of the Flock goes in a different direction but be that as it may.  I don't force my views on anyone (proselytize) nor do I appreciate anyone preaching their religious views to me.  I can take care of myself quite well, thank you.

And do you know what gets me through the days, weeks, months and years?  I know I have a guardian angel.  Of course I know the term "Guardian Angel" connotes Catholic visions of diaphanous lady visions of angels. 
 
Guardian angel for straight folks


That is not my guardian angel folks, that's for straight folks only.  I may have to subject myself to females in the medical industry but my guardian angel is all male.  And yet my male guardian angle isn't necessarily the perfect, Adonis-like, six pack abs exaggerated gay version of a angel either.  That angel is for the gay pulp fiction crowd.  My guardian angel is a regular looking male just like me.  The only difference being that He has accompanied me my whole life and is now with me as I end this term of my earthly existence.


A real guardian angel for Ron
In a few weeks I'll turn 72.  Seven and two are my favorite and lucky numbers.  They add to nine.  I was born on the 9th of November, 1941 at 9:30 a.m. on a Sunday morning.  

I always believed that I had a "presence" with me during my life.  My own personal guardian angel to help me through the challenges in my life.  At times I was pretty low but I never gave up hope because I knew, I just KNEW that I was not alone in my Journey.  

A few months ago my beliefs were confirmed.  Some have a "coming to Jesus" moment.  Some are reborn.  None of those man made events for me.  I don't need nor have ever needed anyone to tell me how to think for believe.  I've always known deep within my soul what was right for me.

Others with judge me and call me as an Unbeliever or ignorant.  But folks, I am in this shell that is called a human body and I have my own soul to live with and understand.  What I tell others who are so concerned about my soul and who say they will "pray for me" (such a condescending attitude that never fails to rile me up), I say "Take care of your own life first, I'll take care of mine."

So today, as I am about to embark on another day of living, continuing to the Final Countdown when I am no longer here on this earth to ruffle feathers, upset the egg basket, and cause consternation of those who profess to "care about me", I say that today is the happiest I've ever been in my life.  I never knew that happiness could be this wonderful.  And that is because my Guardian Angel has come into my life.  


13 comments:

  1. Remarkable post, Ron.

    I grew up believing everyone had a guardian angel too, because I was told so. But later, and up to now, I can't fathom out what would be their purpose - that is if they have one? Certainly not to protect from harm, physical or mental, otherwise we'd see manifestations of their intervention all over the place - unless we are expected to believe that chance, fortuitous happenings constitute the evidence rather than the statistical likelihood that all events could just as equally be deleterious.
    But that, in turn, doesn't mean because I or others can't see the reason for them that therefore they aren't there. It's clearly touched you in a big way and it would be mean to detract anything from your own positive response to the notion. In that way I envy you - and I don't preclude the thought that I'll be thinking the same way before my own call-up time comes.

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    1. Ray.

      I think the reason we have a guardian angel, or the reason I have a guardian angel is to guide me through life. I still have the free will to make my own decisions and sometimes I haven't made the right decision. But you know, I've known when I haven't made the right decision because my guardian angel told me but I ignored him, and yes it is a "him."

      All I know now is that all my life I have hoped and wished and, dare I even say "prayed" for this day to come and it has. I know no other explanation than to attribute my happiness to my guardian angel. I always knew this would happen to me in my life, I just didn't think I would have to wait this long.

      Ron

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  2. Ron

    Great blog post. I believe there's more to life that what we see. I'm certain that you are being looked after by an angel.

    Pat

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    1. Thank you Pat. I concur with your observation that there is more to life than we see. I know that absolutely now. And I too am certain that both you and I are being looked after by an angel.

      Ron

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  3. This reminds me of last season's American Horror Story.

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    1. Rick,

      I missed that one. I'll have to check it out. I hope that story isn't too horrible. I feel I'm going to have a happy ending to my story.

      Ron

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  4. I believe in "me myself and I"; that's all I need. cool for you if you have found a peace within your own self.

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    1. Anne Marie,

      I do too! But I do believe there is a guiding force in my life. Not some white bearded old white man dressed in a toga sitting on a golden throne in the clouds finger pointing lightening bolts to everyone who fails to pass all his game playing "tests" but a force of Love. Whether that love be for your significant other, friend, family, children, pets or career choice. To me the Purpose of Life is about love. To love and be loved. Not to live in fear that if you make one misstep you're banned to the "eternal damnation of Hell." That is all made up crap by men who want to control others who are too lazy or incapable of thinking for themselves. That's the way I see it.

      Ron

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  5. A very interesting and thought-provoking post. I've always maintained that organized religion and sex were the downfall of mankind. We can avoid religion - - but, damn it, we can't avoid sex. I had a long-ago affair with a priest. I know what I'm talking about.....

    As for guardian angels, I do believe..........I'm sure I used to have one....but he (or she?) seems to have abandoned me lately.

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    1. Jon,
      I have absolutely no time for organized religion. It's all about control of one group men over the masses. It's fine if one finds comfort in organized religion but it's not for me. I used to feel the "comfort' but it ceased when that foaming at the mouth purple faced Pentecostal preacher brought me back the reality of organized religion, control by fear. That's the way I see it anyway. I can't speak for others.

      Oh I absolutely believe I have a guardian angel. There have been times in my life that I thought he (and my angel definitely is a "he") but now I realize that he was only letting me find my way. Now that I am nearing the end of my days he has come into my life more fully than ever. Do I sound like one of those crazy religious, "born again" people? I'm not. Just that my spirituality has come full bloom. At least that's the way I see my good fortune these days. I hope you can experience your full bloom soon Jon.

      Ron

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  6. A teacher once told me "There are only two types of religion: bad religion and good religion. Bad religion makes you fear God: good religion makes you want to love God'
    I wrote sometime ago about one of my most extraordinary 'angel stories'; I will try to find it for you

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    1. Dr. Spo,

      I agree with you about the two types of religion. Unfortunately for me I've only been exposed to the religion of fear. "You do this or you're going to hell!" There have been times (all too few) that I have experienced the good religion but they have been few and far in between. Ironically one of the good times was a short period of time that my Mother and I used to attend a church in Valley Forge, PA. The preacher was a Reverend Pennlington. He and his wife were very unassuming, kindly and loving people. We did so enjoy going to that church. Unfortunately our attendance only lasted a short time, Rev. Pennlington was replaced by a typical fire and brimstone preacher, who wasn't as loving (not at all actually). We eventually stopped going which was shame because neither my Mother or I were ever regular church goers again. Another irony, my younger brother is a pastor and has been for the past thirty-five or so years. However, he is a paster at a southern Baptist Evangelical Church. The one and only time I attended a service at his church the main pastor included in his sermon "There are some of you in the audience today who have family members in our church hierachy who are NOT SAVED! Some who practice a lifestyle which is condemned by the Bible........." Here we go again. I've never been back.
      I don't need organized religion thank you. Just me and my guardian angel, we do fine.

      Ron

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  7. Ron,

    Interesting post. My guardian angel has also led me through life, has opened many doors and I truly believe has protected me on more than one occasion. I never thought of my angel as being male or female, and given your post today made me think about what gender my angel is. I cannot really come up with a definitive answer so it will continue to be my angel.

    I was raised in the Episcopal church and the reverend had a cold demeanor towards children, he was not married and spent most of his time with the older wealthier women in the congregation, free cocktails and dinner were his mainstay. I too went through the fire and brimstone Pentecostal church that had a lot warm hearted people. I was older, in my teens and not so impressionable but I tired of that and just drifted away from any organized church or religion. My mother was born Jewish, became an Episcopalian and both she and my dad felt the same way about our church as I did and after they retired they never went to another church. About a year before my dad died she started going to the Presbyterian church and joined. It was for her a wonderful spiritual time and as I visited I attended with her and found the pastor to be warm, friendly and definitely did not preach hellfire and damnation. If her church were close I would definitely join and attend. I have always felt that I was a spiritual person. I feel as I get older that I am missing the spirituality that some churches offer. Coincidentally a close relative of mine is a member of a southern Baptist Evangelical church and swears I will go to hell because I am not saved, at least in her eyes anyway. Unfortunately this has resulted in my not speaking to her and pretty much cutting her out of my life. I just do not have the time. I know who I am and where I am going. It is what you believe that counts, not what someone else thinks YOU should believe.

    BTW. I do not have lucky numbers, at least none that have won me tons of money in the lottery but 7 and 28 would be what they are. I have four sevens in my social security number which add up to 28. Maybe I should play the lottery more than once a year to see if they really are lucky.

    Again, great post and again apologies for the long comment.

    Jack

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