Saturday, January 05, 2013

New Year's Eve Wipeout - 1963

Me "celebrating" New Year's Eve January 1963 - Fifty years ago

This lingering cold of mine is just about gone.  Just a trace left.  I almost felt normal this morning when I woke up.  This past week has been one I will remember well, the New Year of 2013 that I was sick as a dog.

Which reminds me, fifty years ago, January 1963 I was also sick as a dog.  Regular readers of this blog will recognize the picture of me above with my drunken head in a turkey roasting pan surrounded by New Year's Eve party goers.

There is a Story behind this picture folks.  Here it is.  

Way back in the Nifty Fifties, when a young man like me was old enough to join the Army (at 18) but not old enough to vote or drink, I couldn't wait until I could get a good drunk on like all of my Army buddies.  They always seemed to have so much fun getting drunk.  

In November of 1962 I turned 21 years old.  I was of legal age to buy my own car, which I did.  Of course I totaled it one hour after I got it but that's another story for another blog posting.  Hey, a guy my age is full of stories, what can I tell you?

I was also of legal age to drink and I was determined to get "bombed" on New Year's Eve, just like my buddies. 

I was invited to a New Year's Eve party at Dave Fry's house in nearby Glen Burnie, Maryland.  Dave and I were stationed at Ft. George G. Meade, Maryland at that time.

I got in my clunker, and with my Army buddy friend Ron Hampton (yes, another "Ron") we headed off to Dave's house, in my '54 Plymouth sedan that couldn't go over 50 mph without getting the shakes.  My car frame was bent from my accident but I drove the car anyway.  Such was the folly of youth at that time.

When we got at Dave's all the gang was there.  Hey!  We were told to help ourselves to making drinks.  Since I wasn't a beer drinker, I made myself a screwdriver, which as you drinkers will know is vodka and orange juice.  I wasn't sure how much vodka to put in per orange juice. Ron told me 
"one shot per glass of orange juice."  Okay doakey, that's what I did......the first time.




The second time, since I wasn't feeling the "effects", I decided to put TWO shots of vodka per TALL glass of orange juice.  After the second gulping of vitamin C I still wasn't "feeling it."  Hey, where is this "BIG WHOOP!" that I'm supposed to get?  

Third drink....this time I put THREE SHOTS of vodka to one TALL glass of orange juice.  Guess what, we were running out of orange juice and I still wasn't feeling "IT."  

I guess you all know where this is going?  Yep!  Pretty soon I was WHOPPING it up with a TALL glass of vodka and ONE shot of orange juice.

Well folks, let me tell you.  After I don't know how many of those TALL glass of vodka with one shot of orange juice dispersing down through the clear vodka, which was entrancing sort of like a lava light in reverse, I DON'T REMEMBER A THING!

Seriously folks, I remembered nothing until I woke up the next morning on the living room floor, covered in a blanket with my head in a roasting pan.  And my head!  OMG!  My mouth.  OMG!  I felt like a whole platoon of soldiers with muddy boots had marched on my tongue.  My head felt like an anvil was banging around in it like a bell clapper.



Slowly, as I came to I saw Dave's wife standing over me.  I asked "What happened?"  She said "You got drunk."  Hmmmm.  I don't remember having a good time.  In fact I didn't remember anything until now where I was in a GREAT DEAL OF HURT.    

She said I was trying to kick out the TV screen of their floor model Philco.  OMG! Old Timid Ron in a Drunken Rage?  How embarrassing!  

She said she would call my friend Ron at the base and he would pick me up.  I tried to stand up.  I couldn't.  Everything hurt including MY HEAD.  I was starving but I just couldn't imagine anything going down my throat.  Just the thought of eating made me gag.  

Oh dear Lord, is this what they mean by getting drunk and HAVING FUN?  This WASN'T FUN!  

Long story short, it took me about three days to recover.  And folks, never again did I get that drunk.  Oh sure, over the years I've had a buzz or two (or three) but never, NEVER that  blind ass drunk.  I learned my lesson.  

So this year, with this terrible cold that I brought into the new year, I was think I'll always remember this New Year.  Just like I'll always remember that New Year's Eve fifty years ago.  




Me back at the barracks at Ft. Meade 1963 - sober with a cig hanging out my mouth (yes, I smoked too)

22 comments:

  1. Ron: I have a funny story along the same vein that I'd like to share with you.

    My family and I often went to Canada to visit my Aunt and Uncle. We made one trip during the summer when I was 19 years old. I was old enough to purchase alcohol in Canada. I sneaked out to the "Beer Store" and smuggled a six-pack of beer back into the spare room at my relatives' place where I was staying. I waited until midnight, and drank a few after everyone went to bed. Then I panicked and worried that Mom and Dad would find the rest of it. So I did what any "smart thinking" 19-year-old would do. That's right, I drank the rest of the six pack. This was a lot of beer for an inexperienced kid to drink in one sitting. I went to sleep, which is another way of saying that I passed out.

    I woke early the next morning around 6:30 AM, and felt pretty good. (The reason I felt good was that I was still drunk.) I felt so good that I decided to go out for a jog. Then I had a nice big breakfast of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast. By this time it was about 8:30 in the morning. You know where this is headed. (Wait for it.)

    Aaaaand then, the hangover kicked in. By 9:30 I was no longer feeling good.... at all. But wait, there was more! Mom and Dad informed my sister and I that we were going to take a boat tour of Toronto Harbor. Well, I had no way to get out of this. I couldn't tell Mom and Dad that I was sick. My Mom eventually would have gotten to the root of my sickness, and I would have been in loads of trouble. My younger sister, who knew what had transpired, didn't spill the beans to Mom and Dad. She did however tell me that I was a stupid idiot who deserved what I got. She spent the whole boat tour laughing at me, and I couldn't do anything about it.

    I didn't tell my parents about this until I was back in college that fall. My college was over an hour away from home, and they couldn't get at me easily! When I confessed the whole thing to Mom over the phone, there was a few seconds of dead silence, and then she started laughing. She told me that she wondered why I was so grumpy that day. Then she called Aunt Marion and told her. Aunt Marion's response was, "I've rasied three boys; this doesn't surprise me at all", followed by uproarious laughter.

    Needless to say I've never ever gotten drunk since then. I enjoy a glass of wine a few times per week, and the occasional serving of harder stuff. Strangely enough, I've lost my taste for beer.

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    1. Sean,

      That is a funny story! A boat ride with a hangover? Man oh man, that must have been queasy. I got drunk on beer once, draft beer. I'll tell that story in a future blog posting. We've all had those youthful experiences haven't we Sean. Learning experiences. Funny now that we look back upon them.

      Thanks for sharing.

      Ron

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  2. It's quite funny now, not so much at the time. BTW, I'm thinking of starting my own blog. Writing these things down and editing them like this is kind of fun. Yes, I'm about 6-7 years behind the curve on this one.

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    1. Do it Sean! I've started several of my friends to write blogs. Ironically that's how I found Dr. Spo, through a link to a friend's blog who I encouraged him to write after his long term relationship broke up. If you need any help, let me know. I'll be glad to help.

      Everyone has a "story" to tell. Why writing blogs is so much fun is that writing is also good therapy and you make new friends too boot. A win-win.

      Ron

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    2. Thank Sean. Don't worry about those "kinks". They'll work themselves out.

      Ron

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  3. dear sean, I am one of "those people" ron encouraged. I have "met" some wonderful friends online and met some friends in person. it's been a wonderful ride so far!

    now, back to the drinking...I got loaded once while in college (mid-1970s). on screwdrivers. don't know how I drove home that night. and the bed was spinning faster than a centrifuge whirling blood tubes. it's never happened since.

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    1. Anne Marie.

      The one time I got drunk on beer (10 cent drafts, I drank ten of them), when I got back to the barracks and laid down in my bunk, yep.....it was spinning "faster than a centrifuge whirling blood tubes" as you so aptly put it. Of course I promptly leaned over my bed to throw up and barfed all over my spit polished boots that were under my bunk. I think this is why I never became an alcoholic, just didn't have the stomach for it and where was the fun?

      Ron

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  4. Alrighty then! I did it. Now you have a picture with the name.

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    1. Great news Sean! I found your blog and left a comment then I promptly lost it. Could you send me a link?

      Thanks!

      Ron

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    2. Here you go: http://thefrozenchozen.blogspot.com/.
      I'm still working out all the kinks, so bear with me.

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  5. Randy in NEB.11:09 PM

    Ron, I'm afraid to admit it I did the same thing! Only it was 1978,Ft Hood,TX with a half bottle of whiskey. Been there done that threw-up. Was hung over for three days! Monday morning the NCOIC put me to work cleaning out equip. storage. So I was hung over and pissed! Never again! Randy.

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    1. Same here Randy, I was also hung over for THREE DAYS. No fun. I've been drunk a few times since but never to that extent nor will I ever be. I can't imagine being an alcoholic and living a life that way, in a constant drunk. No fun for sure.

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  6. Ron,

    Never been drunk or had a hangover, and never want to. I did almost kill my wife once with drink though. Like you I didn't know how to mix a drink. We were at our apartment and having some drinks. I think I was drinking 7'n'7s. Lo wanted me to make her a Manhattan. I had a How To Make Drinks book. It said 8 parts whiskey to one part vermouth and a dash of bitters. Okay, sounds simple. I put eight shot glasses of whiskey and one shot glass of vermouth in a glass, sprinkled a little bitters on top and gave it to her. Next thing I know she feels sick and goes in the bathroom, where she promptly passes out, falls and hits her head on the toilet. She hit with such force she broke the toilet tank. Fortunately she was okay, except for one horrible hangover next day and a distrust of me as bartender.

    Lar

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    1. Lar,

      Are you sure it was "eight shots whiskey and one shot of vermouth"? Maybe that was for a whole party and not just one person. You were lucky that she didn't die. I could have died too from a toxic overload. Too many college kids have died that way from binge drinking, which is exactly what I did to impress my friends. Peer pressure, it can be a killer.

      Ron

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  7. I got drunk on Limoncello once. After watching Giada de Laurentis on "The Food Network", I bought a bottle and had a bit of it. It tasted so good, I had another glass and another glass. I had no idea Limoncello is vodka with only a bit of lemon and a lot of sugar. I got so drunk, the room was spinning.
    I have never cared for alcohol much but now, even less.
    I am so glad you are feeling better. So many people are sick, I am wondering is I should get a flu shot.

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    1. Nadege,

      Vodka has a way of sneaking up on you because it doesn't taste like alcohol. I do like a martini when I'm out with friends but that is rare because I rarely go out with friends now and if I'm driving I definitely don't have even one drink. Just not worth taking a chance. Maybe it's just as well. When I used to go out regularly during my younger days I always had a gin and tonic. Three in one night gave me a good buzz. I was sort of getting used to them. However, it's been so long now that I've "gone out", that my alcohol tolerance is like a new baby. Again, maybe it is just as well. I enjoy a good Canada Dry ginger ale.

      Flu shot? Every year I get one I get a terrific cold so I don't know what to tell you. For years I didn't get a flu shot and never got a cold. Cause and effect? I wonder.

      Ron

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  8. I've had more than my share of awful hangovers, and they always seem to occur when I have something I absolutely HAVE to do that day, so I wind up taking about half a bottle of aspirin and trying to muddle through. Glad I outgrew that phase of life!

    Not sure if I should laugh or cry at this post! I am laughing about driving a bent car, though. I'll bet you got lousy tire life!

    Peace <3
    Jay

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    1. OMG Jay, the "bent" car was a trip let me tell you. When I totaled the car I should never have gotten it fixed. Every time I went over 40 MPH the whole car shook! And I was always correcting the steering because it seemed like I was always headed for the curb. What a nightmare. I got rid of that car about a month after that New Year's. Had another crash and that was enough tempting of fate.

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  9. You were quite a liver in your younger days. I've had some similar experiences on port.

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    1. Paul,

      Actually I was quite tame. I was trying my hardest to be a "liver" but never quite made the grade. Probably why I'm still alive today. Yes, we all have our "experiences", especially with peer pressure and trying to be like our buddies. I was no exception.

      Ron

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  10. What a scandal ! Disgrace! This sort of thing leads to social dancing.

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    1. I love social dancing, up close. Hmmmmm!

      Ron

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