Tuesday, June 14, 2011

An Abject Public Apology

Yes folks, I am making a public apology.  Yesterday I posted a mean and thoughtless remark about how ALL my friends are OLD AND FAT and don't want to do any physical exercise except dine out.

Mark your calendar folks, I WAS WRONG!

My first mistake was saying ALL my friends are old and fat and lazy.  Hey, maybe some of them are maybe not.  So what?  Who am I to make such a judgement?  Just because some of them don't want to participate in my activities?  I would say that was pretty selfish of me, wouldn't you?  

So, to my friends who are in my age group or older - I APOLOGIZE.  I DIDN'T MEAN IT!  

Having said that, not everyone of my old, fat and lazy friends disagreed with me.  Here is an e-mail exchange from my long time friend Bill B. (who is so secretive that he doesn't like to comment on my blog but I'm outing him anyway):


"I know what you mean.  Every Memorial Day weekend, on Saturday after the Chestertown Tea Party, Betty and Sam have a picnic in MD with a group of about a dozen friends.  We used to spend hours walking around Chestertown after watching the parade, eating all kinds of goodies (fried chicken, pulled pork, crabs, etc.), then watching the Tea party Reenactment on the Chester River.  Now we go back to Betty's a lot sooner in the day and talk.  I sometimes wonder how long this tradition will continue.  So, I'm with you buddy!"


----- Original Message -----
To:  (name removed to protect his privacy)
Sent: Monday, June 13, 2011 9:42 PM
Subject: Re: [Retired in Delaware] Beautiful Monday


I'm not disposing the older friends but facing reality that most of them aren't as physically fit as I am thus I'm going to stop asking them to join me in activities.  I keep hitting this brick wall with them.  Reality hit today.


On Jun 13, 2011, at 5:35 PM, (my old friend) wrote:

"Look for some younger friends.  Don't dispose of the old ones, but some younger blood is good for us."


Then here is another response from another one of my longtime OLD friends:

Larry, aka The Kid and The Old Goat has left a new comment on your post "Beautiful Monday": 


"I take umbrage with this: "ALL of my friends my age or older are overweight and out of shape and don' want to do anything other than eat out again." You know I love walking, it's just distance that comes between us sharing some trails. 

Anyway, I'm waiting to see my schedules at work the next week and maybe then Lo and I can drive down and go with you to that photo shop. I'll reply to your email today.

"I have a bunch of old farts for friends, believe me. I'm the only young one. Sad but true." Indeed!! Someday you have to join me on some of the trails I regularly walk. :)"


Now, to make be really feel guilty, another friend of mine (who has a lot more class than I obviously do) sent me this e-mail today inviting me out to dinner in spite of the thoughtless insult I tossed his way yesterday:

"Wanna go to Boathouse tonight? I know what you said in your blog but you want to go with the Old Geezer's Club?"

I accepted his invitation and will be leaving shortly to join my OLD friends at dinner tonight.

By the way, I can't do what I used to do twenty years ago either and I can hardly get through the day without my daily nap.  

My comeuppance is now complete.  Now which I think I'll ask who wants to join me on that 5k run next week.

"Please accept my apology"


  1. You don't have to be old to be a fart and/or out of shape.

    It's a part of aging and as we age (gay men specifically) the shift in physical appearance goes from vanity to health and from single to relationship (married) which is always good for an extra 20.

    The most important thing is to maintain the friendships and to do what you can.

  2. Sean,

    You are absolutely right. I know young people who are "old farts". Friendship is the most important thing. However, I have noticed that I am leaving a lot of my friends in the dust with my physical activity. It is frustrating that I can't get many of them to participate with me even in just a simple thing like walking. This weekend I'm going to Washington D.C. to walk. I couldn't get anyone to go with me. Same thing next week. I'm going to Philadelphia to walk. Then next month I'm going to New York City for a Day In New York. Alone. Sure would like to have a friend who could keep up with me. But I am sorry I hurt my friends' feelings with my intemperate remarks in my blog posting of yesterday.

  3. anne marie in philly7:05 PM

    hey, if you are coming up here, want some company?

    e-mail me girl9654@yahoo!

  4. Anne Marie,

    I will be in Philly on Wednesday, June 29th. Would you like to do lunch at Woody's at 12? Give me your cell phone number so I can call you when I'm in Philly.

  5. I had read your post but not the comments on it, hence missed your contentious (to you) remark. All I can say is that I wish that I had an 'old fart' for a friend - hell, I wish I just had a FRIEND! (In addition to my much-valued blogger pals like yourself, I mean.)

    But this is about you, not me.

    Yes, I can see that differing levels of stamina dictate the activities in which one can indulge, so it must be frustrating in not having company for activities involving a degree of physical effort.

    Ron, can you identify with the come-uppance I feel at 'our' age now? When you were younger did you, like me, consider that socialising with anyone, say, 20 years older, was beneath one? In fact, must admit even thinking that men more than about 60 were 'repulsive'. Now here I am on the other side - greying rapidly in my solitude with only 2 cats for company (who have more sense and consideration than I used to have), almost praying for just a teeny bit of kind attention from ANYONE. The serpent has come back to bite - and how!

  6. Ron,

    Well, apology accepted, but unnecessary. I'm sure you saw my tongue far in my cheek on my comments as they were like your own about the Spo Shirt pocket placement. Maybe you would come up to Wilmington someday and take a walk up the trails. I don't have anyone who will walk with me either. Lo will go for short hikes of a couple miles on even tracks (she injured a knee last year and can't do further) and Noelle, who walks long hikes is too tied up with work and school.

    One thing I would like to do someday is walk the Northern Delaware Greenway from one end to the other. I just don't want to walk the return trip, so I need a car at each end. You know, park one car, then drive togeter to the other end, park, walk the length and drive back to get the other car.

    One thing I can't do anymore is run. Despite all my walking, my legs are shot when it comes to running.

    Anyway, have a good day and watch what you say.


  7. Lar, I will definitely be more careful with what I say in the future! By the way, I can't run either. 

  8. Ray,

    Believe me, I DO appreciate my friends. In fact my OLD friends surprised me last night when they suggested that we WALK down to the restaurant in Milton where we were eating for our Old Geezer's Night Out. Now I really feel guilty. I have since toned down my attitude and will appreciate my OLD friends as well as all my other friends more. That's what I like about my blog postings, it helps me straighten out these issues in my life. I hope your life is enriched by having friends, old and young, like mine is now.


Comments are always welcome except from SPAM bloggers. I answer all comments. Have a great day!