When I decided to move to the Rehoboth Beach area of lower Delaware back in 2006, I thought my social life would vastly improve. Prior to moving to Delaware, Bill and I lived in the middle of the woods in Pennsylvania, 37 miles west of Philadelphia. All of our neighbors were straight. We had nothing in common with them. We had no social life. I had some straight friends but their interest is more in their family than their gay friend. The only people who seemed to be interested in me was the ever growing population of widows of my former classmates. I'm already "married" plus I have no interest in developing a romantic relationship with any of my former classmates, as nice as they are. None.
Moving to the Rehoboth Beach area of southern Delaware, I assumed our social life would be much different. After all, the Rehoboth Beach area is known as the gay capital of the eastern seaboard.
Rehoboth Beach is about two hours from Washington D.C., Baltimore, and Philadelphia. All those cities have a large gay population which migrates towards the beaches in the summertime. In addition to the weekend gay tourists, there is a growing population of gay retirees.
So one would think that relocating to such an area would be the happy ideal for a retired gay couple, such a Bill and I. Well, think again.
First, Bill doesn't want to have anything to do with any kind of social life....gay or straight. He prefers to stay at home. That's fine, I respect his wish for privacy.
But me, that's another matter. I don't consider myself a social butterfly but I do like to get out and mingle with friends.
I like to talk. I like to laugh. I like to dine out. I like to take trips. I would like to do it with somebody.
What I am not interested in are sexual encounters. I'm not looking for a lover. I'm not looking for a sugar daddy. What I am looking for is a friend.
I am interested in is finding someone like myself. Just a regular, semi-educated (only a two year community college degree) with a moderate retirement income, goofy, immature kind of guy. Well guess what? He doesn't exist. I must be the only one down here in Lower Slower.
Recently I've been following a blog of a married guy who recently came out of the closet. He's frustrated because he's now on the "market" but can't find Mr. Perfect. He having a great deal of difficulty finding a friend.....and a lover. Well, welcome to the real world Frank.
I came out when I was 21 years old (47 years ago.) I was lucky because at the age of 22 I met Bill. We have been together ever since. I'm not alone. But I do like to have friends too. That I have found is hard to come by.
I've been around a long time. I'm fairly attractive. Less so now than when I was in the glory days of my youthful innocence but my visage isn't scaring little children.....yet. I'm sociable, I can hold a conversation and I'm funny....at times. With all that going for me one would think I would be inundated with friends. Not so.
I've come to the conclusion that I'm delusional in thinking because I was gay and moved to a gay resort area that I would automatically have a lot of friends. At best my thinking was unrealistic.
I just got off the phone with my boss at the hotel. I mentioned to him that I was writing about my "friend" problem on my blog. He said he's lived here his whole life (fourth generation Lewes resident) and he only has one or two friends. And he's straight. So you know what? I think I should count my blessings with the friends that I have. I got to get real.
Thank you my friend Bob for inviting Bill and I to dinner at your home tonight. It was a lovely dinner and the conversation was interesting and stimulating. We'll have to do it again.....soon, my friend.